Half a decade later
It feels like it has been just a few days since I roamed this hall as a student, a staff, and a teacher. But it seemed so long since I left that I almost forgot that this hallway would lead me to the abandoned room leading to a fire exit. I came to wonder if it is still abandoned. It is. The room was still full of paper boxes with a pile of dust in which you could write your name.
Then I heard a sound of a kid. It almost scared me because it is a university, and no kids should be running around here. I went out of the room and found that there was indeed a kid playing with his ball in the long hallway. He kicked the ball, making it land on my feet. He looked at me for a while, then looked behind him, then looked at me again. He maybe lost because after that worried look, he cried.
"Hey, hey. Don't cry, please. Here, look at the ball, and I'll shoot the ball again. Would that make you happy? Look." I called him and spun the ball at the tip of my finger. Then the kid looked at me smack. He smiled, then ran up to me and hugged my leg. I smiled and rubbed his head to shoo away his sadness.
"I want to do it too!" he said gleefully. It seems like he was just acting a while ago, but he has tears in his eyes. I wiped it and noticed that it seemed like I had seen these eyes before.
"Put your finger like this and try to balance it," I said as I taught him how to balance the ball. I still can't help to look at his eyes. It made me lose my focus and make the ball roll. The kid ran to catch it.
"What is your name? Where are your parents?" I asked as he came back with the ball in his hand.
"My name is Grey. I'm with my papa, but I got lost, and I can't find him," he said, and he was about to cry again.
"Oh. My name is Gray, too," I said.
"Really?"
"Yes, I'm Gray. And don't worry, okay? I'll help you find him. C'mon," I said as I grabbed his hand and led him to where the program was being held.
But before we got there, he tried to balance the ball in his fingers just like I do it. When he tried to spin it, the ball bounced and rolled on the ground.
Before he could even get it, a man stopped the ball from spinning and picked it up.
"Grey! Where have you been?" the man asked him. "We've been looking for you!"
And there it was. The reason why this kid's eyes seem so familiar.
"Maybe you did not look enough," I said as I approached Flavus. After all these years, the only thing that changed with him was that his head was now highlighted with white hair. But it complemented his still sad eyes.
"Mr. Gray?" he asked. I just smiled and responded with a nod.
"Yes, his name was also Gray," the kid said
"I didn't know you'll come," he said.
"It's a last-minute decision, actually. It just happened that I finally have the guts to come back here after I left," I admit.
He was still looking at me. Probably waiting for what I had to say next, but I kept it that simple.
"Do you want to visit the rooftop garden?" I asked him, and he just nodded. Now I came to wonder what he felt at that time.
After he left the kid to his Yaya, we went straight to that rooftop where we could see the whole university. The rectangular plot remains empty except for the pile of soil and wild grass flourishing above it.
"Your son has your eyes," I said. He looked at me for a minute before he burst out laughing.
"Son? Do you mean Grey? No. He's not my son Sir; he's my brother!"
"Wha... I mean... you do look alike, and he really has your eyes." I explained as he was still chuckling teasingly. "Your sad eyes," I added, making him just smile.
"Does it still look sad?" he asked, looking directly at me.
I looked at him and saw that it was. His eyes are still as sad as before, if not sadder.
"Hmmm," I nodded. "You know, before I came to you at the carnival that night, I already submitted my resignation," he looked at me, confused.
"Why?" he asked again.
"I don't know. I just did it. After what happened, I felt like I had to do it. That I have to leave this place."
"Is it because of me?"
"No. It's not because of you. I admit you're a part of it, but the entirety is because of me."
There was only silence after I said that. I just looked at him while he was staring at the university field below.
After what seemed like an internity, I decided to speak.
"Are you mad?" I finally asked. He looked at me and sighed.
"I don't know," he said softly. "The next day after that night, I went straight to your office and found it deserted. But instead of being mad, I only felt numb. Like I can't feel anything except longing. I know and feel that longing even now. And every day, I always hoped that I would wake up and miss you a little less."
"It was too hard for us to let go, but it would be worse if I stayed. But I wished I had stayed. I should have stayed, Flavus." I said in an equally soft tone.
"But later on, I realized that what we both did was just right, and it's just what we both need. We're both hurt and wounded. And wounded people tend to wound people. And I don't want us to end like that," he said, still not looking at me.
"Life has become unfair and unkind to us in this lifetime and the one before. But I'm always glad that we met. And maybe, when we met again. We can be who we wanted us to be.222Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMmsbJkCpAx
