雖然懷疑的種子已經變成小樹,心裡仍有一部分希望全是自己多心,希望能夠推翻自己的懷疑。於是我一邊仔細觀察著,一邊持續和齊先生約會。344Please respect copyright.PENANALngoU79Ssm
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然而每當看到他的時候,便又將懷疑拋諸腦後,老是要自己別想太多。344Please respect copyright.PENANAEDnfvWR8Um
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我們還是常常去爬山,也去了不少次他姊姊家。344Please respect copyright.PENANArBPW98qW6N
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某天,他又將我帶到他姊姊家,我心知肚明他將這裡當成免費的旅館。344Please respect copyright.PENANAf0bo2Sgdro
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離開時,我們一起到了停車場。
他突然想起什麼似的,說要回去一下,要我先走。
大概是什麼東西忘了吧?我表示想等他一起走,他卻執意讓我先走。
那個表情非常古怪。344Please respect copyright.PENANAWzc7NI2bwT
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他往回走進了電梯,我看著他的背影,看著這個我很常看的背影…344Please respect copyright.PENANA5gT0FrU7XY
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一起去爬山時,只有幾次,我們爬的是較危險的山,需要拉繩攀岩,他才會走在我後面。「如果妳跌倒了,我才能接住妳。」
除了那幾次,他總是走在我前面,嘴裡念著「妳好慢,怎麼不走快一點?」344Please respect copyright.PENANAn11TFXHTcY
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他不知道,我是故意放慢速度的。
這樣一來,我們就要花更多時間爬完那座山,我就更多時間和他相處。
我總是在他後面看著他的背影。344Please respect copyright.PENANAhIuPG7Vkp2
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是從什麼時候開始這麼喜歡他的呢?344Please respect copyright.PENANAeQji968MMk
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回過神來,我還在停車場。344Please respect copyright.PENANAT3rfhGqJNF
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二十分鐘過去,他沒有下樓。344Please respect copyright.PENANAV9kmtQWnLk
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我知道,他不會下樓了。344Please respect copyright.PENANA2Kq1NhzLGn
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「你讓我覺得自己像個情婦。」
打開手機,我傳了這句話給齊先生。344Please respect copyright.PENANANbd2yBldII
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騎車回家的路上,眼淚不停掉,浸濕口罩,霧氣也模糊了鏡片。344Please respect copyright.PENANA9N62TrKFNM
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「我是忘記關總電源才回去。」344Please respect copyright.PENANAureMCHT8UB
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隔天早上,他才回傳訊息。
而我沒有戳破他沒下樓的謊言。344Please respect copyright.PENANAZjt7hsvyjM
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那天我在網路上看到一則新聞,房仲將客戶的房子當成旅館,假借帶看之名行免費炮房之實。344Please respect copyright.PENANArOaxhrZd6m
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正當我在回想那間房子的不對勁時,黑兔子傳訊息來,打斷我的思緒。344Please respect copyright.PENANAQ2RnBeAMG1
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「那台車的車主姓名是黃添財。」344Please respect copyright.PENANARG8soC1bPz
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拜時代潮流所賜,總有一些名字,你一看就知道是什麼年代出生的人。344Please respect copyright.PENANAAzNUs9rsdQ
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但這個名字也是那個年代的菜市場名,就算丟到google上,也不會有任何結果。344Please respect copyright.PENANANuGUeh8lsC
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齊先生也很早就說過車子是家人的,即使車主不姓齊,也不能因此判斷車子不是他家的,所以我便沒有再多對這個名字或那台車多做調查。344Please respect copyright.PENANAXZtz7VVcyG
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患得患失的情形更嚴重了。344Please respect copyright.PENANA1BB0V9uk3L
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某個晴朗的早晨,我睜開眼睛,想著剛剛的夢,夢裡,我偷看了齊先生的身分證,配偶欄不是空的。344Please respect copyright.PENANAQSZ0xkwbwl
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我躺在床上,不停地審視自己內心。344Please respect copyright.PENANASSXOmM7fvw
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在單身四年之前,我有一段狼狽坎坷的戀愛,對方劈腿成性,造就了我一身「抓猴」的能力。但是即使不停的抓到對方偷吃,我也因為自己的執著離不開對方,整整糾纏了三年。344Please respect copyright.PENANAMLKHLurmiZ
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後來選擇單身,除了忙碌,也是怕了,累了。344Please respect copyright.PENANAUf3SBW4AMk
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為什麼經過了這麼久,當我想再次嘗試戀愛,卻又遇見不太適宜的對象呢?
是我經過單身四年,仍然沒有長進嗎?344Please respect copyright.PENANAa7hKBxyveZ
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人說傻瓜都比較幸福,因為太多事情不知道。但像我們這種容易觀察到細節不對勁處的「聰明人」,難道只有裝傻才能獲得幸福?344Please respect copyright.PENANA3DJmrqyKQ3
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我以為談了戀愛應該是要比較快樂,但快樂似乎離自己有些遙遠了。344Please respect copyright.PENANA0ENr8U4vtb
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我坐起來,知道不能再這樣下去。344Please respect copyright.PENANAZYil0YwWZI
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「如果你的配偶欄有人,能不能早點對我坦白?因為你,我覺得自己很不快樂。」344Please respect copyright.PENANAWYCg80eBjT
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看著發出去的訊息,這是第一次開門見山的說明問題,先前我總是試探,不曉得是害怕誤會他,還是害怕知道真相。344Please respect copyright.PENANAOSQsWU7htj
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齊先生也像是讀懂我的難受,很快就回訊息了。344Please respect copyright.PENANAGB4GUSwP8o
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「我不姓齊,名字也不是妳知道的那個。」344Please respect copyright.PENANAwlRRJefgS6
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「我和前女友復合了,但是也放不下妳。」344Please respect copyright.PENANAvBFaMxtN8F
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「對不起。」344Please respect copyright.PENANAGuqf11bGbi
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待續。
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