「唔記得就算啦,但你記唔記得我地應承過童女要好好做人?」320Please respect copyright.PENANACwXH9KqjHf
320Please respect copyright.PENANAu6qdJDVtDu
「真係無啵。你會唔會認錯人架?」我和客人來到後閘,往日見靈車出入才有開閘,今次卻留了道閘縫讓我們入,客人此時似乎很識路,我們靠住牆行,他蒙住頭都能夠在後面提我轉左轉右,要從哪道門入他毫不猶豫。320Please respect copyright.PENANAzEcDj9FaSj
320Please respect copyright.PENANAW2MpaeFWmV
啷啷聲在無旁人的走廊中迴響,我們兩人都心境平靜,絕無趕住投胎意思。320Please respect copyright.PENANAJn3UxB3Hbs
320Please respect copyright.PENANAksORjZ7WXS
「嘿!算啦算啦。」客人問多兩問,見我十問九唔知,就放棄俾提示:「你乜都唔記得咪幾好,至少呢八九年可以活得得自由自在,今日我地六個都要交成績表嚕,仲講返考試都無乜用,當我無提過啦。」320Please respect copyright.PENANAkMeoPNAIjn
320Please respect copyright.PENANA0OrK0musv1
我真是亳無頭緒,不知道交成績表是甚麼意思,但我下一分鐘就見識到了。320Please respect copyright.PENANAxgKOs2VLwD
320Please respect copyright.PENANA1lAKRLFptL
在下一個轉角,一對男女企定定等住我們,男的年約二十,冷帽眼鏡文青背心,手中拎住一根竹筷子,低調握在垂下的手中,至於女的其實是一個小妺妺,粉紅T-Shirt短褲波鞋,眼仔大大,正定睛望住我腰間的鈴鐺。320Please respect copyright.PENANAUDgPEYNArx
320Please respect copyright.PENANASa3cExPAGx
這時男的貼住右邊牆企,女的則貼住左邊,我沒路過唯有停步。鈴鐺沒有發響,客人立即也就停下腳步。「應該未到架喎哥仔。」客人催促。320Please respect copyright.PENANAz7MUT20Ocp
320Please respect copyright.PENANApHk4BCgxMc
「你最好除低膠袋先,有人擋住咗兩邊牆。」我解釋,於是客人立即鬆開頭上膠袋,揭起探視,他一認到擋路男女的外貌,立即展現恭敬點頭打招呼,一手把膠袋除下塞入褲袋,又整理著衣領。320Please respect copyright.PENANApJKHSklpTW
320Please respect copyright.PENANAE1R3WXnSP5
「兩位佛爺,好耐無見。」客人點頭道。320Please respect copyright.PENANA2pzBfKDAv1
320Please respect copyright.PENANARhcHAWEDBu
「千祈咪叫我佛爺,我Christian嚟架。」男人耍手兼擰頭,「叫我Raydon就得。你之前係唐樓天檯都見過我,果陣你地全部用個鐵盆養住,條條香魚都黑咪鼆,我就認唔出你地係邊個打邊個啦,但你仲認唔認得我?我果陣跟過Tina上嚟餵你地。」320Please respect copyright.PENANAxl43eevfvP
320Please respect copyright.PENANArl4ggZs1h2
「記得!你話想重新讀返個腦外科,話心師始終做翻醫生開腦最拿手。」320Please respect copyright.PENANAxw0eNQudzz
320Please respect copyright.PENANAAUbyzNSiqe
「哈哈,你果時個魚仔腦又記性幾好!今日我係嚟幫Tina手,唔洗對我太客氣架啦,好唔好人都好,Tina佢會做判斷。」320Please respect copyright.PENANASK6CwdeYpc
320Please respect copyright.PENANAqfTME1J8oc
這時原來叫Tina的小妺妺開始插嘴:「呢世做人好唔好玩啊?」320Please respect copyright.PENANAF623dmW3Tw
320Please respect copyright.PENANAjmD5WImuXk
客人苦笑:「做香港人唔好玩,不過都好過做條魚。」320Please respect copyright.PENANANh0XER3P2b
320Please respect copyright.PENANAyZG3ddon2M
「嗱,一陣檢查吓你有無乖乖地做好人啦!你地應承過我大過咗唔會好似Mandy咁黑心,我先俾你地用Mandy個身體嘅。」小妺妺說。320Please respect copyright.PENANAXElEw1CYRs
320Please respect copyright.PENANAe4CIOFKr1Y
「知道知道,但合格唔合格分別會點?」320Please respect copyright.PENANA8MQQ8kQsuI
320Please respect copyright.PENANAqtZWtIOvql
「滿意就俾你走,麻麻地就還返你俾Mandy,最多咪做返條魚要等過囉,我同長庚搬咗去英國,你可以試下做炸魚薯條。」320Please respect copyright.PENANAAef1mUuMCU
320Please respect copyright.PENANAKfBn2gPQvY
「炸魚薯條咁油膩,塞血管啊。」Raydon掩嘴笑住講。「嘻嘻!對唔住!讀正呢範有職業病。」320Please respect copyright.PENANAFIy36gwtaP
320Please respect copyright.PENANANhY35tS0yW
「唔識野!長庾煮西餐都好好食架!」小妺妺一臉不忿。「最多我咪幫你成條血脂拎返出嚟,好閒啫!」320Please respect copyright.PENANAQxxcDnyPnt
320Please respect copyright.PENANAE5X0ndxjhA
看住三人談笑風生,我完全被排除在外,我衰在聽不懂,那就劖不到歌柄。320Please respect copyright.PENANAu6OMGpizu9
320Please respect copyright.PENANAxNLj3u1ipI
然後Raydon舉起筷子,開始像個喃嘸佬咦吚哦哦。320Please respect copyright.PENANAdvKCbohmoI
320Please respect copyright.PENANA5QF0oMZumr
「唉,每次聽到尷尬。」小妹妹用手指塞住耳仔。320Please respect copyright.PENANAtsUU2o8Yg3
320Please respect copyright.PENANAau6sHxC6ge
「跟返傳統做法啫,尊重返!」Raydon又開始唸唸有詞,接著將筷子敲打在客人的額頭上,一下一下,就像和尚敲木魚,這時我聽出了四句半偈:「⋯⋯靈台鎖開見青天,不畏人知畏心師,平生不做虧心事,半夜敲門也不驚,也不驚!」320Please respect copyright.PENANA5t9KWXpYRo
320Please respect copyright.PENANAhaIS0MjD2K
Raydon話口未完,客人的額頭就發出「卟」一聲,不知從哪彈出了兩扇閉上的紅漆小門封在眉心,Raydon口咬筷子,然後小心翼翼用食指拇指揭開小門,再用留了指甲的尾指伸入客人腦殼,勾出一圈紅線來,掛在口咬住的筷子一邊頭,咬牙拉拉鬆鬆,尾指又勾多幾條線繩纏在筷子頭尾,像是在解繩結。320Please respect copyright.PENANAP0p5Y6MrbA
320Please respect copyright.PENANAthxHek8vil
「Raydon哥你幾好嘢,一啲都唔痛喎!」客人笑說,我見客人在遇到這對神秘男女後就頻頻做表情,半邊下巴肉都快要脫落了,吊吊揈好驚嚇,難怪師傅勸他遮住塊面唔好嚇親人。320Please respect copyright.PENANADXKDIOm2W0
320Please respect copyright.PENANAwpR6kakezp
Raydon解繩解到一頭大汗,口又咬住筷子講嘢唔清,我大約聽到他講笑推搪,叫還叫唔好加個哥字。320Please respect copyright.PENANACIuQWPLeOx
320Please respect copyright.PENANAsZTLWsWzxL
這時小妹妹又幫口解答:「你實係唔痛啦!心師以前都係魚師嚟,不過佢哋最識得解人腦,後來先分咗家啫。」320Please respect copyright.PENANAVaYJJLKo8h
320Please respect copyright.PENANAYPB7ufvLe4
心師?魚師?我聽都未聽過,你地有無聽過?