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*Trigger Warning: mentions of child neglect, and death. Implied loneliness, and depression. Read with care ❤️
Hawks dropped his head into his hands and let out a sigh. He slowly brought his face up dragging his hand down before resting his chin on his thumbs. He stared blankly forward, millions of thoughts running through his head. He finally looked back at Rena who had still not turned back towards him and had found the random painting on the wall to be much more inviting than the awkward tension in the air.
“Look…” he broke the silence. “I’m not mad or anything. I’m just… worried for your sake. The League of Villains, and especially Dabi, are unpredictable. That’s why I’m undercover. To try and predict what they are going to do next. I didn’t want you to get involved with them because there is no telling what they could do to you. What if they find out you’re from another world? There is no telling what they would do.”
Rena finally looked back at him. She could see the genuine concern on his face. Making her feel even more guilty. “I understand that but... It’s not like I went out looking for him. He dragged me into an alley and threatened to kill me if I didn’t accept his little deal.”
Hawks wings shivered, visibly showing his anger and concern. “Tell me exactly what happened.”
Rena told Hawks every detail of the incident. He just sat quietly and listened. His hands were flat together, resting his fingers on his chin as he leaned forward with his elbows on his thighs. Once Rena was finished he dropped his hands and sat quietly for a moment.
Finally, he reached for his drink and chugged the rest of it down. When he was finished he crunched the can with his hand and then used a feather to carry it to the trash can. Rena watched in amazement as this was the first time she had seen him do something like that with his feathers. I wonder what else his quirk lets him do.
“Well, if that's all he wants you to do then you got off easy. We can easily feed him fake information. I just hope he doesn't ask you to do anything drastic like he asked me.” Hawks sighed as he sat back a little more relaxed now that the alcohol was hitting his system.
He glanced over at Rena who was still slightly in awe of his feathers. “You good there, Mystie?”
“Oh, um yeah. Sorry. So what's your quirk exactly? I assumed it was just for flying. What else can you do?” she said, breaking out of her trance and reaching to take another sip of her drink. The small amount of alcohol hit her faster than she thought. I must be a lightweight. Great..
Hawks chuckled a bit “Well I can control every one of my feathers individually, I can also change their shape and density if I want to. I can feel vibrations from sound waves and interpret them into information.”
“OMG, so you have spy feathers? That's so cool!” She said starry-eyed.
Hawks laughed “Spy feathers? That’s a new one! But don’t go around telling people. That ability is a secret for, well, obvious reasons.”
“No wonder you’re good at eavesdropping.” Rena jabbed, finishing off her drink and reaching for another one. She was still miffed about earlier.
“Ouch. I said I was sorry. I just wanted to check on you and hang out a bit.” He held a hand to his chest, faking offense.
”Mhm. Whatever.” Rena said, taking another big gulp of her drink.
“Whoa take it easy there champ. We’re just casual drinking, no need to rush it.” Hawks chuckled.
Rena wiped her mouth on her sleeve. “Sorry, I guess it’s just taking the weight off a bit.”
”Want to talk about it? That usually helps too.” Hawks wasn’t sure if he should pry since the conversation seemed to be to a lost loved one and to be some heavy stuff. But he also felt the same way sometimes. Even though he was a hero and surrounded by lots of people he too felt lonely, stuck in his own darkness he couldn’t escape.
Rena just sat there quietly, debating to spill her life story to this stranger. She had shared a little with Lucy but didn’t dive too deep. But something about Hawks reminded her of her childhood friend, whom she told everything. Which is why she was conflicted. She didn’t want to get too close but she had a feeling she was about to let it all out. Stupid alcohol.
Hawks decided to gamble it all.. starting with the most interesting part he had accidentally heard. “Soooo, whose Clark?”
Rena’s eyes went wide and she snapped her head up looking at Hawks who had a shit-eating grin on his face. “Just how much did you hear?” She sighed, defeated.
”Um, how upset would you be if I said I heard it from ‘Hey, mom’?” Hawks said, taking a big gulp from his drink, avoiding eye contact by glancing out to the balcony. The scene of the crime.
Rena just rolled her eyes. “Fine. You win.” She took a huge gulp finishing off her second drink.
”So Clark… He was my childhood friend. We met when I was 7. It was the 2nd anniversary of my mother's death. I was not in a good spot, for a 7-year-old I was already lost in the darkness of despair. Silly right?
Growing up, I never really had much thought as to why my Father wasn’t around. Mother never talked about him, only told me once that we didn’t need him. It was just us against the world. I didn’t know or meet any other family until she went to the hospital. A grandmother I’d never met showed up.
It was my mother's mom. They didn’t have the greatest relationship so Mom never talked about her. To put a long story short there, Grandma was upset at my mother getting pregnant with me at such a young age so she disowned her, leaving my teenage mother to raise me on her own. When my mom died, I was placed in the care of a grandmother who wanted nothing to do with me. I was often left alone at the house for months at a time, while she was off traveling the world.”
Rena hadn’t realized the tears that were spilling down her face until a feather appeared with a box of tissues. She grabbed one and blew her nose, giving Hawks a thank you before she continued with her story.
”So two years of being alone, fending for myself, he came along. His grandparents lived across the street so he would come visit them on the weekends and during the summer.
I spent a lot of time by the lake and that’s where he found me. After that, he always made sure to come see me when he was in town. We quickly became friends and we were inseparable when he was around. I began to look forward to the weekends he’d be there. The summers were the best because he’d be there for weeks at a time. He brought me out of the darkness and well, I did what any helpless lonely idiot would do, I fell in love with him.
I was probably 14 when I realized it was more than just platonic love. But coming from a family that didn’t show me any kind of love, well besides my mother, I didn’t know what to do. So I kept it to myself. I didn’t want to ruin what we had because he was my lifeline. Then the unexpected happened. We were 15 and he told me he loved me, but he stopped me from confessing back and instead, told me he would be gone for a while. He said we wouldn’t see each other until after graduation.
3 years. I would be alone again for 3 years. The only thing that kept me sane was counting down the days until he’d be back. That and busying myself with school activities. Then graduation came and went, and so did an entire year afterward. He never showed up. Instead, Versa showed up and I got pulled into this mess. I moved to Florida to distance myself from that place that was so full of memories, so full of… him. It’s been 5 years since I’ve seen him so here I am, heartbroken and alone.”
Rena looked down to her hands where the tissue had been replaced with a glass of water. She took a big drink to ease her dry throat from talking so much. She finished the water, put the glass down, and let out a sigh. “So yeah, that’s Clark and my life story I guess.” She looked up expecting to see Hawks looking at her with pity but instead, she saw him with tears in the corner of his eyes and unexpectedly he jumped up, wrapping Rena in a hug, his wings curling up around the both of them.
“I’m… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked. But… I….I don’t think you are alone anymore. You’ve met friends in the last world you were in and I’d go as far as to say that we’re friends right? I… I could really use a friend, I’m…. I’m alone too.” He said looking towards the ceiling trying to keep himself from crying and staying the ever cool-looking hero that he was.
Rena was shocked by the action but after hearing the hero’s pain spilling through with the way he said he was alone too she understood. She moved her arms and returned the hug. “Yeah, we can be friends. I’d like that.” She smiled.
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