{Tyler}
While everyone else slept, I couldn't help but stare into the sky. The word “monster” kept ringing in my head, clearly in his voice. I resisted the urge to scream, or to destroy my body, even though it was physically painful to do so.
“Tyler?” Rae grabbed my hand, and I yanked it away from her, not in the mood to deal with her bullshit at the moment.
“What?” I snapped, making her flinch,
“Are you okay?” She frowned, looking down on me, while I began pulling my bun out.
“Yeah.” I lied, even though I knew that she wouldn’t buy into that answer.
“You know that Preston is going to be okay, right?”
“No, I don’t know that, and you don’t know that either, complications happen, it’s not that simple.”
“The chance of that happening is so low.” She removed my hands from my hair, forcing them to rest on my chest.
“What if he is that tiny percentage?”
“He won’t be, I promise you.” She leaned down, and moved her lips towards mine, but I blocked it with my hand, forcing her to sit up,
“Please don’t.”
“Why not?” She frowned,
“Because I’m not into you.”
“You were the other night~...” She attempted to put herself on top of me, but I lightly pushed her off,
“No. I wasn’t. I told you several times to get off me, and to leave me alone, so stop with this bullshit.”
“Please, it’ll make you feel better…” Rae held my shoulders down, and this time I pushed her with all my force, sending her crashing into a wall,
“I told you no!” I shouted, pulling up my hood, and walking away, bumping into Ami as we both rounded the corner, “Shit, sorry.”
“It’s okay... What’s going on?”
“I just need to get the hell out of here right now.”
“Well, okay, but where are you going to go?”
“I don’t fuckin’ know, I’ll figure it out.”
“You should go to Tarea’s. I’m sure his mom wouldn’t mind.”
“Uh, yeah, I’ll try that.” I nodded,
“Alright, be safe please.”
“I’ll try.” I muttered, as they rounded the corner into the camp.
“You’re Preston’s… boyfriend, right?”
“We’re not dating, but sure.”
“Really? I swear you guys were making out…”
“We probably were.”
“So you guys want to be in one and you aren’t?” She asked, “Oh, come in, it’s cold.” I awkwardly stepped in, as she shut the door behind me,
“We are in a relationship, just not a romantic one.”
“Ohhh, a friends with benefits kind of thing.”
“Uh, no.”
“Then you guys are…?”
“Queerplatonic partners, if he still wants to be...”
“Ah, okay. Let me pull up google real quick.” She chuckled, “Oh, that's cool. Do you want a coffee?”
“Uh, yeah, that'd be nice, thanks.” I smiled, before looking at Preston who was passed out on the couch. Despite the previous pain he was in, he seemed to be at peace, which was relieving.
“Why wouldn't he want to be in a relationship with you anymore?”
“I was the one who shot him… It was an accident but he already has issues with guns from when we were kids… God, I feel like shit.” I sighed, as she handed me a cup of coffee, “Thanks.”
“You say thank you too much.”
“Yeah, I guess I do… I'm just not used to people doing anything for me.”
“You aren't?”
“No, I'm usually always the one doing things for others… It gets tiring after a while, if I’m being honest.” I sighed,
“Yeah, it does. My husband left me when Tarea was born, and I swear to god, my hair turned gray after a couple months because of the stress.”
“Parenting is challenging. I have nine siblings, they’re all younger than I am, and it’s been tough on them.”
“That’s a lot of kids.”
“Yeah, they were really in love for a while, and since they don’t believe in birth control, or abortions, so… Yeah. Ten of us.”
“I can't even imagine having two kids, how did they do it?”
“I don't know if they really did it. I mean, they were… They tried, but they just aren't fit to be parents.” I sighed, “I was more of a parent than they were. It was... hell.”
“That sucks… Do you miss them then?”
“No. I don't. I… It sounds bad but… I couldn't care less if they died. I'd feel bad that they had shitty lives, because I always feel bad for people, for whatever reason, but after that, I'd continue on as normal.” I muttered, “I wish I could've helped them more though…”
“You can't fix people, if they don't want to be fixed.”
“Huh?”
“You're a fixer. You spend way too much time trying to fix others.” She sighed, taking a sip of her own coffee,
“Oh… Preston nags me for that a lot,” I laughed lightly, looking over at him with a frown, “But I can’t help it… I know what it feels like to feel real shitty, and I don’t want others to go through it… If I just ignore it, it makes me feel guilty as hell.”
“You've got to drag yourself out of your hole before you can drag others out of theirs.” She advised me, before pulling herself up, and walking upstairs to leave me alone with Preston, who was still asleep.
Preston groaned, immediately catching my attention. His eyes were only half open, so I kept my mouth shut, not wanting to wake him completely up,
“Dude, you have terrible aim.” He whispered,
“I know, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. It was stupid to think you’d be helpful when there’s a gun around… I don’t mean that in a bad way, just so you know. It’s just tha-“
“I know, I know. I’m not that sensitive, believe it or not.”
“I don’t. You take things to heart…” Preston sighed, before quickly hopping to a new topic, “What time is it?”
“Two.”
“AM?”
“Yeah.”
“And what day is it?”
“No clue.”
“How long have I been out, then?”
“Only since yesterday afternoon.”
“Oh. Okay. That's good.”
“Yeah. It is.”
ns 15.158.61.51da2
