Kat610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tVEfwWhCh
610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPcxqvJPXRS
January 1, 2005
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Same day
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"That's... not... I wasn't..." I try to explain, but now that the lust haze is gone, I am unable to rationalize my actions. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1FxEgV0Rjg
Was that what I was doing? I wanted to stop thinking about everything and I figured with what I heard about Ben, he wouldn't complain. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxBOxWeL0tB
"Ugh... I'm such an idiot." I cover my face with my hands. I just want to get out of here. Laying next to him in my underwear after being rejected is so embarrassing. I need to leave.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR1AauhRwRq
He pulls my hands away from my face. His eyes meeting mine. "No, you aren't. You are just hurting."610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsm1z5O2Y7H
Is that it?610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTDVxziXkD4
When I caught him with that whore, I was almost relieved. Maybe I'm just not processing my emotions properly... 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhx3xG8ltYJ
I should be devastated. I mean, I am really upset, but I feel more like I'm mourning the life I lost, not the person. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnypXQBDWTd
I think he wanted to get caught. He probably hoped I would join in or something.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAf58h9TyEV
What a creep. How could I give so much to him? I cannot let myself get wrapped up in another man like that again. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZDmHIwuJDn
I need to be strong. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoTfkHp112b
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I need to be independent. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3AUMI9xQPl
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I need to make better choices. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6ZSQpuWx3
I need to... not be here. Crap.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡffxDwvpkwt
Ben makes me feel weak and vulnerable.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRVh6ciJWZ3
But also powerful and wanted. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQsXioK1Tp
Ugh... I am so confused. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEzeZERRlrv
I do know that hopping from one guy literally onto another is not a good choice.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZS5niYv6cf
I also know that nothing casual can happen with my best friend's boyfriend's best friend. That would be all kinds of complicated. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgIn46spNZz
Hopefully I haven't made things too awkward. Oh god, what if they get married? I will have to see him all the time. I will be reminded of this night forever.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8oPBUjgZaT
He smirks, tucking my hair behind my ear. "There she is, the wheels are turning again." 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1oNjh9j7t
I can't help the laugh that bubbles up. I probably sound insane, but this night is all sorts of messed up. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX07Gsw3Cmm
His face lights up and his dimples emerge. Crap. His smile turns my insides to jelly.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsIHQuqSonr
"Come on, Katarina, give the poor little hamster a break. Tell me your thoughts." He gives me a reassuring smile. I'm not sure I like him using my full name, it makes my heart flutter.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbCwkumqXlZ
"I think..." I need a light topic. I just want to ignore my problems. "I think this has been the weirdest night."610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2VDHAyANy3
He nods in agreement. "Weird good or weird bad?"610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgkrqwpbqlC
"Hah... Both?" I wince, knowing he's going to prod for more and I don't want to go any deeper.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDrB2hUxmoF
"I am going to have to agree with you." I was not expecting him to agree. "Although, I think yours had a bit more bad than mine." His hand caresses my cheek and I can't help but lean into his touch. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh8daSYoDUu
I am so weak. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ZFpIqvbBG
"Hmm..." His touch is relaxing and I feel the day catching up with me. The emotions and tears taking their toll on my body. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBqrHVimAjJ
"You falling asleep on me, Kitty Kat?" I can hear the smile in his voice, but I'm having trouble keeping my eyes open.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEyzrod5tqe
"I am not a cat." I say, as sternly as I can muster, but it comes out weak. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGgzJUkaRkF
"Meow." He chuckles at his own joke.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhuR4Fhe392
"You are so not funny." I mumble.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5VKVbik66B
"Oh come on. You're no fun." He tries to tease me, but he doesn't realize just how accurate he is. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3rWekTnOdD
Maybe if I were more fun, things would be different. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVleJYCJNwS
"If only you knew..." I snuggle into his hard chest, hoping he won't ask anymore questions. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj04QX2XNs0
I know I should leave, but I just can't bring myself to part with him. I'm sure he's filling some void and I'm being pathetic, but he hasn't thrown me out yet.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLiRS4u7b9H
In fact, he pulls me tighter. Resting his face in my hair. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTID59yfkTL
"Don't worry, I will protect you." He whispers and as I drift off into oblivion, I actually believe him. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9rs1Wi2Ikg
I awake to the sounds of muffled shouting. There is a heated argument somewhere nearby. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhx8cm14cxj
When I try to move, I bump something hard with my elbow and freeze. I hear a groan and feel the bed move slightly. I am not alone.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcLIomgeZUH
Oh no. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXz6OsdZPbI
What did I do? 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbctwBuEcHw
Scanning the room, I realize I have no idea where I am or who could be behind me.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC1lI5M6Ria
Unless Vanessa is having a really rough morning, that was definitely too deep to be her voice.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡocQNSlDzki
Crap. I am too afraid to look, who could it be? Bits and pieces from the night come to me, but not enough to piece together anything solid.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4E65tWWLOT
I remember crying at some point.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1inQ3BM7G
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I remember drinking more than I should have.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhilzANQH6
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I remember Vanessa being her usual self. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG8FrIn99Zp
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I remember her new boy toy stuck to her side. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjtnlnibW06
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And I remember... Uh oh. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8WgMuj24rr
It couldn't be... I wouldn't... Would I?610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0xeHuvyrF9
Am I really asking myself this after waking up next to some random guy? Well, maybe not so random...610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhp7IBRvWpp
Oh god, this is all sorts of complicated. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp76JJ6iKT5
Okay, I just have to know... I try to roll over gently, without disturbing him. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1jmFtZMq1s
I find a pair of amused green eyes staring back at me. A gorgeous grin with dimples on his stupid perfect face. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxlcivtKYYz
Crap. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS4liqgRXQq
I know I'm blushing hard, I can literally feel my face burning. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrbrvgksJFM
How did this happen?610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPwGMra3dUo
"You done freaking out yet?" He asks with a chuckle. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjILSaE4Qiw
Is he... laughing at me? 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2qfPsBQrwO
"Uh..." And just like that, he has short circuited the connection between my brain and mouth. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZncK0g8rld
"Don't panic." He talks softly, like I am some wild animal that might bite him.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe6xYprcWY4
I am totally panicking. I just can't decide if I want to run out of the room or stay and figure out what exactly happened. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxVwsUFt2XM
My curiosity wins, just barely. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFmWsQ7ahRP
"Nothing happened." I must look really confused, because he feels the need to explain further. "We didn't have sex."610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxn2yMB9i5Y
"Oh..." I'm not sure if I should be relieved or hurt that he was naked laying next to me.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7bjG7NKQcs
Nope. Not letting my mind go there.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0CmycpeQ2H
I choose to feel relief. I wouldn't have remembered it anyway. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ347u7VQCqj
"Not for lack of you trying, of course." He flashes a cocky smirk at me. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAs31OYxRuL
I feel a frown tugging at the corners of my mouth, despite my attempt to keep my face neutral. No, I didn't throw myself at him, did I? 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiHLeJHs3sN
I vaguely remember waking up and thinking I heard my name through the wall and then... 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6SiZYqCat
"No way... I... Oh god!" My eyes pop open so wide, they begin to hurt.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3eV3sngHxJ
Crap. Did I really climb on top of him? Yep, I was totally grinding on him.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP8yyq0Nfgu
I gasp, my gaze running down his body before I can stop myself. I take in his muscles, but his bottom half is covered in a sheet. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdr4Othh1I1
His eyes meet mine. "Reminiscing?" 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAgfeCpJk6m
"What! No!" My voice is too high and rushed to be convincing. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqRTuZMffHc
I remember licking his defined chest.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP9n3YCGAL2
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I remember... 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq8r2nr5aZb
he was naked!610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMkid7bpfgv
I inwardly groan. I totally touched him. I know how big he is and... 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnXtBD5DuHf
Oh god! I know how he tastes. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgillcKEGTG
"Shit." I know it's inelegant, but I can't think of anything else to say.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡronjM6Tfly
His mouth pops open as his face twists in shock. "Did you just... I can't believe you just said shit!" 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyxHYs7hJb6
"What? Why not?" I sit up, feeling defensive. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhUIJAuKBw
Why is he so shocked? He barely knows me. Why does he assume this? Did I say something weird last night?610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6lrGk7Ac4d
"You seemed kinda offended when I cussed, so I guess I just assumed..." He looks shy, almost like he was caught doing something wrong.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡve067kw3ZR
"Based on?" Sure, I don't make a habit of using curse words, but it's more an ingrained reflex than an actual choice. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdFGUNCsCF2
He hesitates, like he's afraid to say and I begin to feel slightly nervous. Crap, what did I say?610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5q8ZUbihn2
"You... uh... kinda flinched." He blushes and looks around the room. Insecure Ben is totally adorable. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6MqZOoPfF3
"Oh." I'm honestly not sure how to respond because I definitely can't tell him the truth. "Well, I wasn't offended."610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiLC4Pw4f69
"Okay." He blows out a breath, looking up at the ceiling. "If you say so." 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb5Nh5fWPGa
He looks completely unconvinced but I can't give him more than that. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCe233PqRwN
"So." He clears his throat. "Not to be totally awkward here..." His gaze drops to the tent of his crotch before his eyes scan the floor. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKUMYIj5Uz8
"And not that I would mind laying in bed with you all day." He looks down my body and winks. "But, maybe we should get dressed?"610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88joW5wRUc
I look down at myself, just now realizing I'm sitting here in lacy underwear. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyGigOXwp9M
When I don't respond, Ben flashes his smile. "Or not, I mean you look great." 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfLkRtNox5D
I am unable to hide the look of shock on my face before I snatch the sheet to cover myself. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbqKYEoXXPT
Which is no longer covering "Little Ben", if you can even call it that.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoq1ZGB38zK
Oops.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqFyfjKID2y
Of course that would happen to me! I take a moment to look at it in the daylight and wow, it's like a sculpture. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtyum1YeKmN
Unable to stop myself, I have apparently lost my filter completely around this man. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzr5R51p3En
"Well hello, Big Ben." I try not to giggle like an immature school girl, but Ben's laugh makes me laugh harder. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNITDx6t68K
"Big Ben, huh?" He grins, making my stomach flutter. He shakes his head, amused. "What am I going to do with you?"610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAtlCjvpQx3
My mouth goes dry as my mind conjures up all kinds of things he could do to me. It feels like all the air was sucked out of the room as I struggle to control my breathing. Is it hot in here, or is it just me?610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6eBR6S0HO6
My gaze returns to "Big Ben", as it seems to grow, straining to reach me. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa1txuQG6Ux
Prying my eyes away, I meet his green gaze. He's no longer grinning or teasing, in fact, it looks like he's in pain. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAi4XUs2bIZ
"So, you like what you see?" His eyes never leaving mine. I try to close my mouth and steady my breathing. I need to keep my composure, but my head nods without my approval. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡySMuaWnniQ
I lick my lips, remembering last night. I can't get my mouth to form words.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxZrTncHTSr
"Because I wouldn't mind seeing a little more." He reaches forward, tugging down the sheet. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFs2j9yuTIt
He sucks in a breath. "Fuck, Kat."610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡelkd9rh8Ra
I close my eyes, my insides turning to liquid fire. I love his cussing, like he can't control himself. Maybe it's because of my background and it makes him seem like such a bad boy, but it turns me on, like crazy.610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2T6smFODa1
He caresses my breasts through the sheer fabric. "God damn, you are beautiful." 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYbsKcR28Kf
I absorb his words as another wave of lust hits me. I know this is a bad idea. I know we should not be doing this, but I'm not sure I could stop it, even if I wanted to. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfZsB4M3L0
His hands move down my body as his mouth meets mine. His kiss is hungry and desperate and I can't get enough. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGgq8fov6J0
His hand grazes me where I'm aching and I nearly explode. I need him. Now. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡarS1PCYJdp
"Do you have a condom?" He has to have one in here somewhere, right?610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8YtYTeBL9A
He blushes and looks slightly uncomfortable. "Actually..." We both freeze as the sound of yelling grows closer. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZYXhZiyOA
I pull the sheet up to cover myself just as the door bursts open. All I see Vanessa's fiery hair flying around as she takes the scene before her. "What the fucking fuck is fucking going on in here?" 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxist0NuaQy
I know her well enough to know when she can't think, she drops f-bombs. Her gaze drops to Ben's crotch, before he grabs a corner of the sheet to cover himself. 610Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4eSaC8liDa
I can't help the laughter that bursts out of me at the sight of her craziness. "Calm yourself, Vanessa."
ns 15.158.61.55da2
