Kat621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv3REVMJI8k
621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ798sPp8U2t
January 1, 2005
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Same day
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"That's... not... I wasn't..." I try to explain, but now that the lust haze is gone, I am unable to rationalize my actions. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwvSwkqsG5U
Was that what I was doing? I wanted to stop thinking about everything and I figured with what I heard about Ben, he wouldn't complain. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFqqEy5wIj
"Ugh... I'm such an idiot." I cover my face with my hands. I just want to get out of here. Laying next to him in my underwear after being rejected is so embarrassing. I need to leave.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoYq8jrHvGx
He pulls my hands away from my face. His eyes meeting mine. "No, you aren't. You are just hurting."621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsouOfaLDqs
Is that it?621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJy5EebecY
When I caught him with that whore, I was almost relieved. Maybe I'm just not processing my emotions properly... 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcrSFWZLWA2
I should be devastated. I mean, I am really upset, but I feel more like I'm mourning the life I lost, not the person. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtx2vrmZDJd
I think he wanted to get caught. He probably hoped I would join in or something.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1zYxTD9h6P
What a creep. How could I give so much to him? I cannot let myself get wrapped up in another man like that again. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2AU6V4ljWk
I need to be strong. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNxeyIVPpeE
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I need to be independent. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡareFgTvNqD
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I need to make better choices. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0eZcM26eNy
I need to... not be here. Crap.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVH1ByYxl1r
Ben makes me feel weak and vulnerable.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡapCRB0ECGE
But also powerful and wanted. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdPcPLB5a7U
Ugh... I am so confused. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjvDOC0ifGN
I do know that hopping from one guy literally onto another is not a good choice.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0DjAJzJgyp
I also know that nothing casual can happen with my best friend's boyfriend's best friend. That would be all kinds of complicated. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWEsKaCS7vb
Hopefully I haven't made things too awkward. Oh god, what if they get married? I will have to see him all the time. I will be reminded of this night forever.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRssZTPaabn
He smirks, tucking my hair behind my ear. "There she is, the wheels are turning again." 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvNLDZ9wigc
I can't help the laugh that bubbles up. I probably sound insane, but this night is all sorts of messed up. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPnRaaAuEP2
His face lights up and his dimples emerge. Crap. His smile turns my insides to jelly.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqedbMw34W7
"Come on, Katarina, give the poor little hamster a break. Tell me your thoughts." He gives me a reassuring smile. I'm not sure I like him using my full name, it makes my heart flutter.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbGQL5NBJL7
"I think..." I need a light topic. I just want to ignore my problems. "I think this has been the weirdest night."621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAUnnU2IwQR
He nods in agreement. "Weird good or weird bad?"621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6KaWnleIie
"Hah... Both?" I wince, knowing he's going to prod for more and I don't want to go any deeper.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4iVpJwLNSi
"I am going to have to agree with you." I was not expecting him to agree. "Although, I think yours had a bit more bad than mine." His hand caresses my cheek and I can't help but lean into his touch. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT2RGFWKTmr
I am so weak. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH5yicQ5SAv
"Hmm..." His touch is relaxing and I feel the day catching up with me. The emotions and tears taking their toll on my body. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7rmPqDCk0
"You falling asleep on me, Kitty Kat?" I can hear the smile in his voice, but I'm having trouble keeping my eyes open.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuz1IXbd5S8
"I am not a cat." I say, as sternly as I can muster, but it comes out weak. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5gW1uuL5jz
"Meow." He chuckles at his own joke.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqAgpJyQ45F
"You are so not funny." I mumble.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡljHO6PmGlZ
"Oh come on. You're no fun." He tries to tease me, but he doesn't realize just how accurate he is. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWRnP8yTSRx
Maybe if I were more fun, things would be different. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVycoKy02jF
"If only you knew..." I snuggle into his hard chest, hoping he won't ask anymore questions. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hzUyUxyGc
I know I should leave, but I just can't bring myself to part with him. I'm sure he's filling some void and I'm being pathetic, but he hasn't thrown me out yet.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdAbPbc6jvc
In fact, he pulls me tighter. Resting his face in my hair. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiRAG3uLl5Y
"Don't worry, I will protect you." He whispers and as I drift off into oblivion, I actually believe him. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmHk5QxcZuY
I awake to the sounds of muffled shouting. There is a heated argument somewhere nearby. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rxDFqxhXq
When I try to move, I bump something hard with my elbow and freeze. I hear a groan and feel the bed move slightly. I am not alone.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl46Nlg7oNC
Oh no. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJo2inINPh4
What did I do? 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ZQB0vqQ1Z
Scanning the room, I realize I have no idea where I am or who could be behind me.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2bJhq4xyG
Unless Vanessa is having a really rough morning, that was definitely too deep to be her voice.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsIydPGptGp
Crap. I am too afraid to look, who could it be? Bits and pieces from the night come to me, but not enough to piece together anything solid.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNqK6NUSYJz
I remember crying at some point.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdeWtZLh97I
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I remember drinking more than I should have.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqcpxBtro0a
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I remember Vanessa being her usual self. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9OBraTNQXg
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I remember her new boy toy stuck to her side. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGupN64NbwC
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And I remember... Uh oh. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOnchgnrW9U
It couldn't be... I wouldn't... Would I?621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3t7ubYX6E6
Am I really asking myself this after waking up next to some random guy? Well, maybe not so random...621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkYXdE0e82E
Oh god, this is all sorts of complicated. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡunMxwVcXD6
Okay, I just have to know... I try to roll over gently, without disturbing him. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnmZYMTmgDb
I find a pair of amused green eyes staring back at me. A gorgeous grin with dimples on his stupid perfect face. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMgRHpR7bMa
Crap. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOygzxQkrww
I know I'm blushing hard, I can literally feel my face burning. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpN4LLLF1FV
How did this happen?621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmZsNdLKhSg
"You done freaking out yet?" He asks with a chuckle. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4rD6SJHEKq
Is he... laughing at me? 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXg7tpHv8HW
"Uh..." And just like that, he has short circuited the connection between my brain and mouth. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhPAJ1IvDg5
"Don't panic." He talks softly, like I am some wild animal that might bite him.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcR9nu8Mmy4
I am totally panicking. I just can't decide if I want to run out of the room or stay and figure out what exactly happened. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgVfQ9qO9uC
My curiosity wins, just barely. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz5XWBsKmIC
"Nothing happened." I must look really confused, because he feels the need to explain further. "We didn't have sex."621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡArAVd97umb
"Oh..." I'm not sure if I should be relieved or hurt that he was naked laying next to me.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSskIC5e2xf
Nope. Not letting my mind go there.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj4zGiAzRpb
I choose to feel relief. I wouldn't have remembered it anyway. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGHiROTcfT
"Not for lack of you trying, of course." He flashes a cocky smirk at me. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4jwtaCzQmO
I feel a frown tugging at the corners of my mouth, despite my attempt to keep my face neutral. No, I didn't throw myself at him, did I? 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJrThX5B3jS
I vaguely remember waking up and thinking I heard my name through the wall and then... 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp0GTy7JLWZ
"No way... I... Oh god!" My eyes pop open so wide, they begin to hurt.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtD41LKPF4
Crap. Did I really climb on top of him? Yep, I was totally grinding on him.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC49afGK2AP
I gasp, my gaze running down his body before I can stop myself. I take in his muscles, but his bottom half is covered in a sheet. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ94CTaCDjvI
His eyes meet mine. "Reminiscing?" 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQxMLWTRFum
"What! No!" My voice is too high and rushed to be convincing. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXc29lt0Qs
I remember licking his defined chest.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfTU1Emfk2
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I remember... 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSHZQ9o5Fyn
he was naked!621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj460bWqWKM
I inwardly groan. I totally touched him. I know how big he is and... 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6BLVUYK6it
Oh god! I know how he tastes. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX8fwRXsxXG
"Shit." I know it's inelegant, but I can't think of anything else to say.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXwJ6ZGQM9Z
His mouth pops open as his face twists in shock. "Did you just... I can't believe you just said shit!" 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWV0hJTWUiF
"What? Why not?" I sit up, feeling defensive. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZU8WIMLY5e
Why is he so shocked? He barely knows me. Why does he assume this? Did I say something weird last night?621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjYXm4s2Cgs
"You seemed kinda offended when I cussed, so I guess I just assumed..." He looks shy, almost like he was caught doing something wrong.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBJuez8oNBV
"Based on?" Sure, I don't make a habit of using curse words, but it's more an ingrained reflex than an actual choice. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtx4ENrMzke
He hesitates, like he's afraid to say and I begin to feel slightly nervous. Crap, what did I say?621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsf9FM0BPiD
"You... uh... kinda flinched." He blushes and looks around the room. Insecure Ben is totally adorable. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0t2saCgc38
"Oh." I'm honestly not sure how to respond because I definitely can't tell him the truth. "Well, I wasn't offended."621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJguXONGE38
"Okay." He blows out a breath, looking up at the ceiling. "If you say so." 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBEFVOWyrE3
He looks completely unconvinced but I can't give him more than that. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvEdgpByeiE
"So." He clears his throat. "Not to be totally awkward here..." His gaze drops to the tent of his crotch before his eyes scan the floor. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBNFR0Gqwf
"And not that I would mind laying in bed with you all day." He looks down my body and winks. "But, maybe we should get dressed?"621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cjorWP2Rq
I look down at myself, just now realizing I'm sitting here in lacy underwear. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPlKDlWlCo
When I don't respond, Ben flashes his smile. "Or not, I mean you look great." 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeGzEURwDdP
I am unable to hide the look of shock on my face before I snatch the sheet to cover myself. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCCVUDDJAuF
Which is no longer covering "Little Ben", if you can even call it that.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ961cV4VQbN
Oops.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOavZlaGHS
Of course that would happen to me! I take a moment to look at it in the daylight and wow, it's like a sculpture. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡatqFUnAgL5
Unable to stop myself, I have apparently lost my filter completely around this man. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSnaiKRrJeX
"Well hello, Big Ben." I try not to giggle like an immature school girl, but Ben's laugh makes me laugh harder. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQtopG9tk7d
"Big Ben, huh?" He grins, making my stomach flutter. He shakes his head, amused. "What am I going to do with you?"621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9v3O2hRX05
My mouth goes dry as my mind conjures up all kinds of things he could do to me. It feels like all the air was sucked out of the room as I struggle to control my breathing. Is it hot in here, or is it just me?621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz6THGYCnMw
My gaze returns to "Big Ben", as it seems to grow, straining to reach me. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDsxsAEs0KZ
Prying my eyes away, I meet his green gaze. He's no longer grinning or teasing, in fact, it looks like he's in pain. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTvFgFIYcQp
"So, you like what you see?" His eyes never leaving mine. I try to close my mouth and steady my breathing. I need to keep my composure, but my head nods without my approval. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRnKnZbFjMr
I lick my lips, remembering last night. I can't get my mouth to form words.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN6PYQhp2wr
"Because I wouldn't mind seeing a little more." He reaches forward, tugging down the sheet. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVq2VmVG2v
He sucks in a breath. "Fuck, Kat."621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa796EQCVTa
I close my eyes, my insides turning to liquid fire. I love his cussing, like he can't control himself. Maybe it's because of my background and it makes him seem like such a bad boy, but it turns me on, like crazy.621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmfEyOFbiwa
He caresses my breasts through the sheer fabric. "God damn, you are beautiful." 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4TZmu0KDk
I absorb his words as another wave of lust hits me. I know this is a bad idea. I know we should not be doing this, but I'm not sure I could stop it, even if I wanted to. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1sBtAON1xO
His hands move down my body as his mouth meets mine. His kiss is hungry and desperate and I can't get enough. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnAZiB17cmW
His hand grazes me where I'm aching and I nearly explode. I need him. Now. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNGZhqPpUvA
"Do you have a condom?" He has to have one in here somewhere, right?621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ9BDzbFmXt
He blushes and looks slightly uncomfortable. "Actually..." We both freeze as the sound of yelling grows closer. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFk5v5rrUu1
I pull the sheet up to cover myself just as the door bursts open. All I see Vanessa's fiery hair flying around as she takes the scene before her. "What the fucking fuck is fucking going on in here?" 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWLgmbEkTe
I know her well enough to know when she can't think, she drops f-bombs. Her gaze drops to Ben's crotch, before he grabs a corner of the sheet to cover himself. 621Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSeEHqZhgQD
I can't help the laughter that bursts out of me at the sight of her craziness. "Calm yourself, Vanessa."
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