Kat606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRWfeFmqeEB
606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKanwc3HQcQ
January 1, 2005
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Same day
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"That's... not... I wasn't..." I try to explain, but now that the lust haze is gone, I am unable to rationalize my actions. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMA44WHtySy
Was that what I was doing? I wanted to stop thinking about everything and I figured with what I heard about Ben, he wouldn't complain. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVMcn20z4I
"Ugh... I'm such an idiot." I cover my face with my hands. I just want to get out of here. Laying next to him in my underwear after being rejected is so embarrassing. I need to leave.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpkdVcRUhNg
He pulls my hands away from my face. His eyes meeting mine. "No, you aren't. You are just hurting."606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSxusBdPfiJ
Is that it?606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1nR3MFvX8B
When I caught him with that whore, I was almost relieved. Maybe I'm just not processing my emotions properly... 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJwzRjUsFix
I should be devastated. I mean, I am really upset, but I feel more like I'm mourning the life I lost, not the person. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHEhINIGQCw
I think he wanted to get caught. He probably hoped I would join in or something.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFvi4bdGpxR
What a creep. How could I give so much to him? I cannot let myself get wrapped up in another man like that again. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqJBGnxjQXn
I need to be strong. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkfHj3ovcsO
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I need to be independent. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcRLfH9DapB
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I need to make better choices. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ07H0AjKWb6
I need to... not be here. Crap.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9nTyhTSLCR
Ben makes me feel weak and vulnerable.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwUeWTyPtZe
But also powerful and wanted. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvZtyHxrLAJ
Ugh... I am so confused. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4uMW7dCWmu
I do know that hopping from one guy literally onto another is not a good choice.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGEHxNGJpU
I also know that nothing casual can happen with my best friend's boyfriend's best friend. That would be all kinds of complicated. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmamGL3ADdY
Hopefully I haven't made things too awkward. Oh god, what if they get married? I will have to see him all the time. I will be reminded of this night forever.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfsceGyWarZ
He smirks, tucking my hair behind my ear. "There she is, the wheels are turning again." 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi90BxHhB2I
I can't help the laugh that bubbles up. I probably sound insane, but this night is all sorts of messed up. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ54EU6v6BUE
His face lights up and his dimples emerge. Crap. His smile turns my insides to jelly.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofbbX3kIWE
"Come on, Katarina, give the poor little hamster a break. Tell me your thoughts." He gives me a reassuring smile. I'm not sure I like him using my full name, it makes my heart flutter.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP2aHh5ZOJb
"I think..." I need a light topic. I just want to ignore my problems. "I think this has been the weirdest night."606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNB085UhCdz
He nods in agreement. "Weird good or weird bad?"606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7GFjbmouyT
"Hah... Both?" I wince, knowing he's going to prod for more and I don't want to go any deeper.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTvkThlPzP
"I am going to have to agree with you." I was not expecting him to agree. "Although, I think yours had a bit more bad than mine." His hand caresses my cheek and I can't help but lean into his touch. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy8i3iRfNIa
I am so weak. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dXMl37yuZ
"Hmm..." His touch is relaxing and I feel the day catching up with me. The emotions and tears taking their toll on my body. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2Om5KU2wX
"You falling asleep on me, Kitty Kat?" I can hear the smile in his voice, but I'm having trouble keeping my eyes open.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡreirqf7mQi
"I am not a cat." I say, as sternly as I can muster, but it comes out weak. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ84XRUoaWr6
"Meow." He chuckles at his own joke.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK4YsgafRLp
"You are so not funny." I mumble.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ18VNLCYe8z
"Oh come on. You're no fun." He tries to tease me, but he doesn't realize just how accurate he is. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ402RD6rNNr
Maybe if I were more fun, things would be different. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcX0LKe2mIk
"If only you knew..." I snuggle into his hard chest, hoping he won't ask anymore questions. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxrocGPPT2
I know I should leave, but I just can't bring myself to part with him. I'm sure he's filling some void and I'm being pathetic, but he hasn't thrown me out yet.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡadIrc8NJR4
In fact, he pulls me tighter. Resting his face in my hair. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM3QdnXI01O
"Don't worry, I will protect you." He whispers and as I drift off into oblivion, I actually believe him. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrfY3bwhnl9
I awake to the sounds of muffled shouting. There is a heated argument somewhere nearby. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Ls1KT9cfL
When I try to move, I bump something hard with my elbow and freeze. I hear a groan and feel the bed move slightly. I am not alone.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYlpxSwxrx3
Oh no. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2aWTWRJfpR
What did I do? 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT5emmkFhFN
Scanning the room, I realize I have no idea where I am or who could be behind me.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU4YrBaBUfC
Unless Vanessa is having a really rough morning, that was definitely too deep to be her voice.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbmQwGvFmI
Crap. I am too afraid to look, who could it be? Bits and pieces from the night come to me, but not enough to piece together anything solid.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEPQNo5ZlnV
I remember crying at some point.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWp12X3RjJ6
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I remember drinking more than I should have.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjsvKqqImXJ
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I remember Vanessa being her usual self. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVrMhvGVC0
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I remember her new boy toy stuck to her side. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN0T7eR2fgc
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And I remember... Uh oh. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5y6G9pNwJg
It couldn't be... I wouldn't... Would I?606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOltSCgBFm8
Am I really asking myself this after waking up next to some random guy? Well, maybe not so random...606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeGNdEjDcBd
Oh god, this is all sorts of complicated. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfZLtZ6bMN
Okay, I just have to know... I try to roll over gently, without disturbing him. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr1RnyohvL7
I find a pair of amused green eyes staring back at me. A gorgeous grin with dimples on his stupid perfect face. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeImjJHEft9
Crap. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUa65PsH930
I know I'm blushing hard, I can literally feel my face burning. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrNTbLzdB5u
How did this happen?606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM60HKRjDvs
"You done freaking out yet?" He asks with a chuckle. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGajdAZuzoy
Is he... laughing at me? 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOXRwDrnI8R
"Uh..." And just like that, he has short circuited the connection between my brain and mouth. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOTKjnY3Y28
"Don't panic." He talks softly, like I am some wild animal that might bite him.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtLHDexSKRb
I am totally panicking. I just can't decide if I want to run out of the room or stay and figure out what exactly happened. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjfE7n0Sa1F
My curiosity wins, just barely. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuostg0He8w
"Nothing happened." I must look really confused, because he feels the need to explain further. "We didn't have sex."606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ00WPVcHYEb
"Oh..." I'm not sure if I should be relieved or hurt that he was naked laying next to me.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3m5xQ1ac11
Nope. Not letting my mind go there.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIpJ3TusXqP
I choose to feel relief. I wouldn't have remembered it anyway. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi4nTJz1JWS
"Not for lack of you trying, of course." He flashes a cocky smirk at me. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gi35ZvTRj
I feel a frown tugging at the corners of my mouth, despite my attempt to keep my face neutral. No, I didn't throw myself at him, did I? 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwn4BuuFIME
I vaguely remember waking up and thinking I heard my name through the wall and then... 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhlNtfaNgQx
"No way... I... Oh god!" My eyes pop open so wide, they begin to hurt.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe04boQcKPA
Crap. Did I really climb on top of him? Yep, I was totally grinding on him.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvDwKg9xI1j
I gasp, my gaze running down his body before I can stop myself. I take in his muscles, but his bottom half is covered in a sheet. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwOtoCDGLi3
His eyes meet mine. "Reminiscing?" 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpTMEANpaXJ
"What! No!" My voice is too high and rushed to be convincing. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy29sQhB0Wg
I remember licking his defined chest.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJJ86GEqv1V
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I remember... 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4cnhgg7leN
he was naked!606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh51OxcUibL
I inwardly groan. I totally touched him. I know how big he is and... 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡThj8QowBH4
Oh god! I know how he tastes. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeumcv5kj3n
"Shit." I know it's inelegant, but I can't think of anything else to say.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8kphsRM7xq
His mouth pops open as his face twists in shock. "Did you just... I can't believe you just said shit!" 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOVGFi9dsLk
"What? Why not?" I sit up, feeling defensive. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbRdUGqYls
Why is he so shocked? He barely knows me. Why does he assume this? Did I say something weird last night?606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWtt9RVOps7
"You seemed kinda offended when I cussed, so I guess I just assumed..." He looks shy, almost like he was caught doing something wrong.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlpkXP4tBzB
"Based on?" Sure, I don't make a habit of using curse words, but it's more an ingrained reflex than an actual choice. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLRUiJ4r1ie
He hesitates, like he's afraid to say and I begin to feel slightly nervous. Crap, what did I say?606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcsTVZe3ewO
"You... uh... kinda flinched." He blushes and looks around the room. Insecure Ben is totally adorable. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkzktBgLeaW
"Oh." I'm honestly not sure how to respond because I definitely can't tell him the truth. "Well, I wasn't offended."606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrTop01hlr7
"Okay." He blows out a breath, looking up at the ceiling. "If you say so." 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhZduZRwmjh
He looks completely unconvinced but I can't give him more than that. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHvM9KW4KQv
"So." He clears his throat. "Not to be totally awkward here..." His gaze drops to the tent of his crotch before his eyes scan the floor. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF8i58qBB1F
"And not that I would mind laying in bed with you all day." He looks down my body and winks. "But, maybe we should get dressed?"606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuQ1SkXhbJB
I look down at myself, just now realizing I'm sitting here in lacy underwear. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxb6LiKzIQ1
When I don't respond, Ben flashes his smile. "Or not, I mean you look great." 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GGm7hIVpq
I am unable to hide the look of shock on my face before I snatch the sheet to cover myself. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG75UghtKDN
Which is no longer covering "Little Ben", if you can even call it that.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5QbKQQs91i
Oops.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfAFVJGLFAy
Of course that would happen to me! I take a moment to look at it in the daylight and wow, it's like a sculpture. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4bqwuAaoC
Unable to stop myself, I have apparently lost my filter completely around this man. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtwHsDUkya7
"Well hello, Big Ben." I try not to giggle like an immature school girl, but Ben's laugh makes me laugh harder. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPJ0qrnmUi
"Big Ben, huh?" He grins, making my stomach flutter. He shakes his head, amused. "What am I going to do with you?"606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtx7JdVfGJm
My mouth goes dry as my mind conjures up all kinds of things he could do to me. It feels like all the air was sucked out of the room as I struggle to control my breathing. Is it hot in here, or is it just me?606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1mb7dn63k
My gaze returns to "Big Ben", as it seems to grow, straining to reach me. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwoEqWd6H8D
Prying my eyes away, I meet his green gaze. He's no longer grinning or teasing, in fact, it looks like he's in pain. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9FFHhtwkX
"So, you like what you see?" His eyes never leaving mine. I try to close my mouth and steady my breathing. I need to keep my composure, but my head nods without my approval. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnlNJJgNkfW
I lick my lips, remembering last night. I can't get my mouth to form words.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS3HQL2gsOX
"Because I wouldn't mind seeing a little more." He reaches forward, tugging down the sheet. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGfVHv2mCs5
He sucks in a breath. "Fuck, Kat."606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ11Ku7KIZbd
I close my eyes, my insides turning to liquid fire. I love his cussing, like he can't control himself. Maybe it's because of my background and it makes him seem like such a bad boy, but it turns me on, like crazy.606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmbTSA0pHyC
He caresses my breasts through the sheer fabric. "God damn, you are beautiful." 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq0YgyrrBpF
I absorb his words as another wave of lust hits me. I know this is a bad idea. I know we should not be doing this, but I'm not sure I could stop it, even if I wanted to. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhuXdkY9Wfo
His hands move down my body as his mouth meets mine. His kiss is hungry and desperate and I can't get enough. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYQ3Ba2lxlV
His hand grazes me where I'm aching and I nearly explode. I need him. Now. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡERAOedIfEB
"Do you have a condom?" He has to have one in here somewhere, right?606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZemk8YTt1I
He blushes and looks slightly uncomfortable. "Actually..." We both freeze as the sound of yelling grows closer. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZWx2sW6y6Z
I pull the sheet up to cover myself just as the door bursts open. All I see Vanessa's fiery hair flying around as she takes the scene before her. "What the fucking fuck is fucking going on in here?" 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8zd1tNe4hG
I know her well enough to know when she can't think, she drops f-bombs. Her gaze drops to Ben's crotch, before he grabs a corner of the sheet to cover himself. 606Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp1ISCmR0gf
I can't help the laughter that bursts out of me at the sight of her craziness. "Calm yourself, Vanessa."
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