Kat594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK7DaMiNHaa
594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8YT9APj8F8
January 1, 2005
*
Same day
*
594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDycZ6Gw74y
"That's... not... I wasn't..." I try to explain, but now that the lust haze is gone, I am unable to rationalize my actions. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwv4EyLt3BR
Was that what I was doing? I wanted to stop thinking about everything and I figured with what I heard about Ben, he wouldn't complain. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3GiAnLacxd
"Ugh... I'm such an idiot." I cover my face with my hands. I just want to get out of here. Laying next to him in my underwear after being rejected is so embarrassing. I need to leave.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZp4QVbYh0
He pulls my hands away from my face. His eyes meeting mine. "No, you aren't. You are just hurting."594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvRPbDYiqOh
Is that it?594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoGu0DP9IKS
When I caught him with that whore, I was almost relieved. Maybe I'm just not processing my emotions properly... 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqk3PlncUeh
I should be devastated. I mean, I am really upset, but I feel more like I'm mourning the life I lost, not the person. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGywJAvWABT
I think he wanted to get caught. He probably hoped I would join in or something.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4vVldERYPe
What a creep. How could I give so much to him? I cannot let myself get wrapped up in another man like that again. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5uF2oIvFgY
I need to be strong. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdtRhdl4Whn
594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzLVSCnGPed
I need to be independent. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZtVzZDuN8W
594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUnp2XEiVtW
I need to make better choices. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB3diJaoojk
I need to... not be here. Crap.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGBnYeX5cv3
Ben makes me feel weak and vulnerable.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡInIn5pn28I
But also powerful and wanted. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXxd229ehOt
Ugh... I am so confused. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG5SdFItIt4
I do know that hopping from one guy literally onto another is not a good choice.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi5uiY355Tz
I also know that nothing casual can happen with my best friend's boyfriend's best friend. That would be all kinds of complicated. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCd2qgyPNp
Hopefully I haven't made things too awkward. Oh god, what if they get married? I will have to see him all the time. I will be reminded of this night forever.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK6TnNWVd4o
He smirks, tucking my hair behind my ear. "There she is, the wheels are turning again." 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ42LVWxyRCd
I can't help the laugh that bubbles up. I probably sound insane, but this night is all sorts of messed up. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXLB9MP3Tyl
His face lights up and his dimples emerge. Crap. His smile turns my insides to jelly.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZBZolF9C8O
"Come on, Katarina, give the poor little hamster a break. Tell me your thoughts." He gives me a reassuring smile. I'm not sure I like him using my full name, it makes my heart flutter.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpj1v1b1mDH
"I think..." I need a light topic. I just want to ignore my problems. "I think this has been the weirdest night."594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGq2P8SfCS2
He nods in agreement. "Weird good or weird bad?"594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOPagU5QZsK
"Hah... Both?" I wince, knowing he's going to prod for more and I don't want to go any deeper.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoy4vsEkcJ5
"I am going to have to agree with you." I was not expecting him to agree. "Although, I think yours had a bit more bad than mine." His hand caresses my cheek and I can't help but lean into his touch. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOAwdu92o6V
I am so weak. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLzSkfPoEdk
"Hmm..." His touch is relaxing and I feel the day catching up with me. The emotions and tears taking their toll on my body. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfMbv7fxE59
"You falling asleep on me, Kitty Kat?" I can hear the smile in his voice, but I'm having trouble keeping my eyes open.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6lMjBtwwJK
"I am not a cat." I say, as sternly as I can muster, but it comes out weak. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8QYxBTyi6U
"Meow." He chuckles at his own joke.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Xb57vXvnw
"You are so not funny." I mumble.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0aQcvXjzug
"Oh come on. You're no fun." He tries to tease me, but he doesn't realize just how accurate he is. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ZOUvo974S
Maybe if I were more fun, things would be different. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqG5bzdUA0k
"If only you knew..." I snuggle into his hard chest, hoping he won't ask anymore questions. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnWLJnRyYyB
I know I should leave, but I just can't bring myself to part with him. I'm sure he's filling some void and I'm being pathetic, but he hasn't thrown me out yet.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡomi3wIYeE2
In fact, he pulls me tighter. Resting his face in my hair. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsFjGQFijJY
"Don't worry, I will protect you." He whispers and as I drift off into oblivion, I actually believe him. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ97VojfMPHD
I awake to the sounds of muffled shouting. There is a heated argument somewhere nearby. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLPWvOkgKgK
When I try to move, I bump something hard with my elbow and freeze. I hear a groan and feel the bed move slightly. I am not alone.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE4ygkJNbS6
Oh no. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaeEhmCwOkc
What did I do? 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq3eDovZ7Sh
Scanning the room, I realize I have no idea where I am or who could be behind me.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM2nxxuh701
Unless Vanessa is having a really rough morning, that was definitely too deep to be her voice.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDxeVUOGp5i
Crap. I am too afraid to look, who could it be? Bits and pieces from the night come to me, but not enough to piece together anything solid.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5EzVt93ZGw
I remember crying at some point.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLgWp7sUWyP
594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCQm7n1cKj
I remember drinking more than I should have.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3BNmTbGhu4
594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGewhVFJdku
I remember Vanessa being her usual self. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXLaip278Fq
594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw9apyUq9LD
I remember her new boy toy stuck to her side. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ38p2wXKt6b
594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvH6YQ6qB5B
And I remember... Uh oh. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcs9KmY7tPn
It couldn't be... I wouldn't... Would I?594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxrbqpUunSc
Am I really asking myself this after waking up next to some random guy? Well, maybe not so random...594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpMwGsT2lCs
Oh god, this is all sorts of complicated. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeCi1TxH6gM
Okay, I just have to know... I try to roll over gently, without disturbing him. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxPnKtxMw4
I find a pair of amused green eyes staring back at me. A gorgeous grin with dimples on his stupid perfect face. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgSr27M83lr
Crap. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSCp8w9Zee1
I know I'm blushing hard, I can literally feel my face burning. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8NK0oh8lP
How did this happen?594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUOy2VZcOQM
"You done freaking out yet?" He asks with a chuckle. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnjQJ1ScA16
Is he... laughing at me? 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡujrqTqFQYg
"Uh..." And just like that, he has short circuited the connection between my brain and mouth. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpJaQrlNYfE
"Don't panic." He talks softly, like I am some wild animal that might bite him.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyKXTxo3SX
I am totally panicking. I just can't decide if I want to run out of the room or stay and figure out what exactly happened. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1hFgCsUZSz
My curiosity wins, just barely. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz4oJlcB4wR
"Nothing happened." I must look really confused, because he feels the need to explain further. "We didn't have sex."594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2RPMzBzoWz
"Oh..." I'm not sure if I should be relieved or hurt that he was naked laying next to me.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOVyn1XS7Xv
Nope. Not letting my mind go there.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwg6WBYF9Ub
I choose to feel relief. I wouldn't have remembered it anyway. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQsFUFV9sz8
"Not for lack of you trying, of course." He flashes a cocky smirk at me. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCRxZ7RghgL
I feel a frown tugging at the corners of my mouth, despite my attempt to keep my face neutral. No, I didn't throw myself at him, did I? 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡohZqT4iqZw
I vaguely remember waking up and thinking I heard my name through the wall and then... 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk29cet0Byz
"No way... I... Oh god!" My eyes pop open so wide, they begin to hurt.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoPjhmOCrEE
Crap. Did I really climb on top of him? Yep, I was totally grinding on him.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMdrnlTEC6n
I gasp, my gaze running down his body before I can stop myself. I take in his muscles, but his bottom half is covered in a sheet. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUsTpZKcdP6
His eyes meet mine. "Reminiscing?" 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZeJsBA2O4
"What! No!" My voice is too high and rushed to be convincing. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGRy4cAMeT
I remember licking his defined chest.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLc861uKJBc
594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNvPwbg1Jva
I remember... 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMTKSX5PcL
he was naked!594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcs9Ma6fEga
I inwardly groan. I totally touched him. I know how big he is and... 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe2rEISxGBB
Oh god! I know how he tastes. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4PISEcZiJ
"Shit." I know it's inelegant, but I can't think of anything else to say.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ6m7o6S5eK
His mouth pops open as his face twists in shock. "Did you just... I can't believe you just said shit!" 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tTwAPct31
"What? Why not?" I sit up, feeling defensive. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsQOdrmxYeh
Why is he so shocked? He barely knows me. Why does he assume this? Did I say something weird last night?594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡePmmEUwBdF
"You seemed kinda offended when I cussed, so I guess I just assumed..." He looks shy, almost like he was caught doing something wrong.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV7LIQLFimp
"Based on?" Sure, I don't make a habit of using curse words, but it's more an ingrained reflex than an actual choice. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7aBhZMLAam
He hesitates, like he's afraid to say and I begin to feel slightly nervous. Crap, what did I say?594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmILsVzgdOQ
"You... uh... kinda flinched." He blushes and looks around the room. Insecure Ben is totally adorable. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9plPzdgn5
"Oh." I'm honestly not sure how to respond because I definitely can't tell him the truth. "Well, I wasn't offended."594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqy7JK1yBLd
"Okay." He blows out a breath, looking up at the ceiling. "If you say so." 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPQaEwOMhC2
He looks completely unconvinced but I can't give him more than that. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxggy5ZkwzG
"So." He clears his throat. "Not to be totally awkward here..." His gaze drops to the tent of his crotch before his eyes scan the floor. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyuwuL9RkzO
"And not that I would mind laying in bed with you all day." He looks down my body and winks. "But, maybe we should get dressed?"594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3rMOfDDskY
I look down at myself, just now realizing I'm sitting here in lacy underwear. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDECIlujQNL
When I don't respond, Ben flashes his smile. "Or not, I mean you look great." 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmql5mVuHV
I am unable to hide the look of shock on my face before I snatch the sheet to cover myself. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdS5ly0JYqW
Which is no longer covering "Little Ben", if you can even call it that.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ1MphRuHiN
Oops.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEydOgdLdFn
Of course that would happen to me! I take a moment to look at it in the daylight and wow, it's like a sculpture. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCDxYMGuFNA
Unable to stop myself, I have apparently lost my filter completely around this man. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhA9sJm2vVI
"Well hello, Big Ben." I try not to giggle like an immature school girl, but Ben's laugh makes me laugh harder. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeJiJ58idZo
"Big Ben, huh?" He grins, making my stomach flutter. He shakes his head, amused. "What am I going to do with you?"594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOcMzosQ5cx
My mouth goes dry as my mind conjures up all kinds of things he could do to me. It feels like all the air was sucked out of the room as I struggle to control my breathing. Is it hot in here, or is it just me?594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36c7z4iPJx
My gaze returns to "Big Ben", as it seems to grow, straining to reach me. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ7A08K094F
Prying my eyes away, I meet his green gaze. He's no longer grinning or teasing, in fact, it looks like he's in pain. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsdEs9Iyzko
"So, you like what you see?" His eyes never leaving mine. I try to close my mouth and steady my breathing. I need to keep my composure, but my head nods without my approval. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuFWvd07TMo
I lick my lips, remembering last night. I can't get my mouth to form words.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF2dl4rtvgX
"Because I wouldn't mind seeing a little more." He reaches forward, tugging down the sheet. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqD6ehN5tgU
He sucks in a breath. "Fuck, Kat."594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5zYlBAb4To
I close my eyes, my insides turning to liquid fire. I love his cussing, like he can't control himself. Maybe it's because of my background and it makes him seem like such a bad boy, but it turns me on, like crazy.594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ3ksGMyB0F
He caresses my breasts through the sheer fabric. "God damn, you are beautiful." 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqtdEOgRu2b
I absorb his words as another wave of lust hits me. I know this is a bad idea. I know we should not be doing this, but I'm not sure I could stop it, even if I wanted to. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDtIRdMhLGM
His hands move down my body as his mouth meets mine. His kiss is hungry and desperate and I can't get enough. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2sZKjQ4vU7
His hand grazes me where I'm aching and I nearly explode. I need him. Now. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwI0iwvnYg
"Do you have a condom?" He has to have one in here somewhere, right?594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwKCgfohSfV
He blushes and looks slightly uncomfortable. "Actually..." We both freeze as the sound of yelling grows closer. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWMJg1twL6K
I pull the sheet up to cover myself just as the door bursts open. All I see Vanessa's fiery hair flying around as she takes the scene before her. "What the fucking fuck is fucking going on in here?" 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgSxgk7ZkTc
I know her well enough to know when she can't think, she drops f-bombs. Her gaze drops to Ben's crotch, before he grabs a corner of the sheet to cover himself. 594Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ96BbuMPRYG
I can't help the laughter that bursts out of me at the sight of her craziness. "Calm yourself, Vanessa."
ns 15.158.61.6da2
