The remainder of the month seems fine. The only problem Zye seems to have is that Jace hasn’t been around. Callua drops in plenty and stays for long periods of time. But the one person he wants to see is busy. He understands, of course, but more than popping in hasn’t happened in weeks.
It’s one reason why he’s decided he’ll go get something special to eat today. The small restaurant a street over has the best sandwiches and it’d make him feel better. Not that anyone can stop him. Kass has given him today off and Shae is working. Even Callua canceled on him because she needs to go help Jace.
No big deal.
All he has is a headache, nothing dramatic, and he hasn’t had any problems like before since that day. It should be fine. The only bad part is the fact that it’s overcast and chilly. Not a lick of sun pierces the thick cloud coverage. It’s gray and dreary. But at least there’s no snow with spring right around the corner.
Zye keeps the black jacket zipped up and the hood pulled over his head. Just in case, he keeps one hand in his jacket pocket, fingers wrapped around his phone. His fingertips rub up and down the slender casing around it to stay calm.
He definitely should have worn his sunglasses. If anything, to just keep the looks away.
The destination isn’t very far at all once he gets takes the shortcut through the backyard. It’s just down around the corner and on the other side of the street. So close.
It’s the first thing he sees.
It’s still daylight yet it doesn’t matter. If anything, it’s probably encouraged by the terrible weather blocking the sun. The same type he saw last time idles at the corner. From what he can see it’s at least different in its shape; large, round, and intimidating with three tentacles extending from its back.
His breath catches in his throat at the sight. No one sees it but him. Thankfully, he doesn’t think it sees him. The best he can do is turn around and dart into the alleyway he just passed. It has him more than grateful that he lives in the older part of the city where buildings aren’t crammed together.
“Shit…figures. Can’t even go out.”
The only thing he can do is think of returning home. Ordering out will have to suffice. Taking a step away from the wall, Zye finds the world tilting. The only reaction he can afford is leaning back against the wall with all his weight, allowing it to catch him. He slides down while taking a deep breath.
“Fuck, why now?” he groans out while palming his face.
There’s a splitting pain blossoming between his eyes. It mimics the one that curls up his spine and extends to his left side. All of it has him sinking to the ground while not caring who sees. His forehead leans against his knees as he tries to breathe, to calm whatever is happening. Meanwhile, the thoughts are endless and the anxiety is amping up with each second.
How in the world will he get home like this?
There’s no one to call to come help him. Of course, he’s sure someone would. But then they’d know he went out without someone. That thought alone has him feeling helpless.
Can he really do nothing on his own anymore?
The back of his throat burns at that thought. If he were home, he’d be in bed with a pillow pushed against his face to catch the tears. That as well as the screams of frustration.
But here?
Fingers grip at his phone tightly he’s almost afraid he’ll break it before he can get it out of his pocket. He lifts it up and begins to turn the screen on. He’s scrolling through the contacts when he realizes he does have one person that he could call. Someone that won’t scold him about what he’s doing. Someone that’s removed from the situation— for the most part.
Selecting the contact, he waits for it to start ringing before lifting it to his ear. He’s glad it only takes a moment for the line to pick up. Hearing Hax’s voice has relief flooding his body.
“Hello?”
“Uh…Hi, it’s Zye.”
There’s a brief pause. “Is everything alright?”
Zye drapes an arm over his knees and then presses his forehead to it. “Yeah…Maybe? I was wondering if you were busy at the moment.”
“Not at all. I was just leaving to go get something to eat before returning to work.”
It’s taking too long to push the words out. Long enough for Zye to change his mind about doing this. He’ll get home on his own. This is stupid, thinking he can just call this man up and he’ll drop everything for him.
“Ah, I hope you get something good. I actually…I have to go. Sorry, I shouldn’t have—”
“Zye. Please, I’m not that stupid. Send me your location and I’ll be right there.”
“You don’t have to. I shouldn’t have called. It’s nothing.”
A heavy sigh hits Zye’s ears. “Don’t be a child. I offered. Besides, I have something I want to talk to you about.”
He did call Hax. It’s rude as it is to try and skirt out of the call. That and he really could use the ride. If the quivering muscles in his legs are anything to go by, there’s no way he’d make it home before Shae. That’s the one thing he doesn’t want to happen. Shae would have him at Kass’s before he can blink.
“Fine, sure, I’ll message you my location.”
“Would you like me to stay on call with you until I get there?”
“I should be fine. Same car?”
“Yes, I’ll see you soon.”
The line goes silent. It takes a moment to send Hax a message with his location. All he can do is turn the phone’s screen off and clutch at it like it’s his only lifeline. The silence makes waiting for Hax even worse. He’s too unnerved to peek around to see if the Nether is still there. Not when there’s an off chance that it can sense him not just see him.
He lets out a heavy sigh and begins to stand up. The least he can do is not look like he’s some pathetic man huddled in an alley. Zye keeps looking at the time; flicking the screen out and waiting for the bold numbers to shimmer into focus. After about five minutes he scoots closer to the sidewalk.
There’s a small bit of attention drawn to him as he does. Not that he’s surprised. Tall with a hood pulled up and lurking in an alley? It doesn’t spell great things about him. He doesn’t particularly care either. He meets each of the eyes that look at him so that they quickly move along.
By the time the anxiety is worming up to the surface, he sees it— that same car as last time. It gets close, not quite to where he is, but enough to where he can run to it should he need to. His phone chimes and that’s his sign. He tries to keep his walk normal, not too hurried or panicked in appearance.
The window to the passenger seat rolls down as he gets close. Peeking into it, he’s met with Hax’s smile. “Ready to go?”
“Uh…yeah.” Zye opens the door and slips inside.
A thunk as the door shuts. Zye buckles himself in and waits for Hax to start moving. Pulling back onto the road, he begins the task of taking Zye home.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to make you drive all the way out here.”
“Don’t be. It seems to be how we usually meet and it’s not all that bad. I don’t mind escorting you home.”
“I guess. I feel bad, I could have been interrupting and it has to be annoying. We barely know each other.”
Hax breaks, waiting at the stop sign for someone to cross the street. It allows him to glance over at Zye. “I had nothing going on. I’m too old to be running around with a full schedule.”
“Wait. What? You don’t look that old.”
“I’m old enough to be your father. But thank you for the compliment.” His eyes return to the road as the car moves forward.
Something Zye is thankful for. Zye has to cut his eyes away. He wants so badly to stare— to try and figure out if this man is bluffing. Then again, it wouldn’t be completely out of the ordinary. He could have already been in his late twenties when they first met for all Zye knows.
“So, can I guess you’re some wealthy suit then? Not that I wouldn’t chip in for—”
“No, no. But I’m well off, so don’t worry about it. Think of it as we’re even. I’ll get you home safe and you can give me your ear for a minute.”
Coming to a stop outside of the house, he pulls up to the curb seeing as Zye’s motorcycle is in the driveway. The car turns off and Hax unlocks the doors, “Shall we?”
“Yeah, sure.”
Zye hurries to get out first. All so he can lead Hax up to the front door and unlock it. Welcoming this unexpected guest inside has him a little uneasy. He hopes no one else shows up. Explaining things would be a hassle and he doesn’t care to deal with it right now.
Following the lead of the shoes by the door, Hax steps out of his black slip-ons. He only goes in so far while Zye locks up and does the same. Stepping around Hax, he gestures to the couch. “Do you want something to drink?”
“I’m fine, thank you.”
Zye moves toward the chair when Hax makes his way to the couch. Standing there, he begins to slip out of his jacket. Meanwhile, Hax sits down and gets comfortable. Hax rests his hands on the lap of his dark gray slacks with lighter gray pinstripes on them.
Turning toward Zye, his bangs shift against his face but still manages to hide his left eye. The rest of the hair, held into a high ponytail, cascades down his back. He seems to hesitate at first with fingers plucking at the long black sleeve he wears.
“Do you know a man named Jace, by chance?”
Zye is stunned. To the point where the jacket slides off his arms and onto the chair. His eyes never leave Hax’s.
“Ah. I’m sorry…I saw his name on your phone the last time we met. I was just wondering if it was the same person. Silver eyes and yellow tattoos below them?”
“Why?” he asks back while stepping closer, staring down at Hax.
“You see…I haven’t been able to reach him lately. He’s helped me out quite a bit. Much like when I drove you home away from that dark thing that was following you.”
“Wait. Hold on. You can see them too?”
Hax nods and stops fiddling with the sleeve now that Zye has let the tension go. “I can. It’s why I don’t usually get out much. They’re everywhere, more so than usual.”
Zye, sitting down, is still quite confused. “But what does that have to do with Jace?”
“Oh, he’s a bodyguard of sorts. I’m not sure how he keeps them away but it seems that his presence is all it takes. However, he’s been avoiding my calls lately.”
“Sorry about that. I know he’s been busy. I can let him know if you want.”
“No, I was just hoping he’s alright. I don’t want him to think I overstepped by asking your help to contact him. I haven’t been getting out much, anyway, so it’s fine.”
“If you’re sure. Oh! Have you tried finding one of these?”
Zye extends his wrist and pulls up the light blue sleeve to reveal the bracelet cinched around his wrist. Hax leans forward almost immediately. One hand holds onto Zye’s while the other brushes over the medallion resting against Zye’s wrist.
“I think I’ve seen this before.”
“He said it can help protect against them. I mean, they’re still pretty freaky and I don’t recommend getting close.”
“True. Especially when you don’t know what they are.” Hax’s fingertips glide off the cool metal and brush over Zye’s skin. “I’ll have to get one myself. Someone I know was talking about wards and whatnot, maybe this is what they meant.”
“If you want I can try to find the person that made this one. Or even ask Jace about it.”
Zye lifts his head to meet Hax’s eyes and that’s when it hits. The sensation that rushes through him has him wanting to fall over. His head feels heavy and the world dares to try and tilt. It takes all he has to not let Hax notice— at least he hopes the man doesn’t.
“It’s alright. I know he’s a busy man and you’ve helped me much more. If I need to I’ll get in touch with either of you.”
“Glad I could help. Anything else you needed?”
Hax pulls away and it has Zye feeling like the man takes his energy at the same time. Not that he thinks it’s possible. He chalks up the disorienting feeling to the adrenaline finally leaving him. He shouldn’t have gone out, to begin with. However, at least the headache seems to be gone.
What he doesn’t expect is to be sent a concerned gaze from the man next to him. “No, but are you alright?”
Zye scoffs, “Yeah…Yeah, I’m fine. I’ll, uh, walk you out.”
Hax scoots to the end of the couch. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll see myself out. You should lay down and get some rest before—”
Zye is crumpling towards him before Hax can even finish speaking. He sighs as he catches Zye. All of Zye’s weight hits him with his head gently knocking against his shoulder. It takes him a moment to slip away and lie Zye on the couch. Something that’s easier said than done, considering. He makes sure Zye is comfortable as best he can with his legs bent and leaning toward the back of the couch.
He grabs Zye’s arm and lifts it from where it hangs awkwardly. Setting it across the man’s stomach, Hax lets his fingers brush over the coin once more. There’s a strange fondness in his gaze as he rubs his thumb over it.
“Ridiculous…she could have made it a little more durable like I asked. There’s already not a lot of energy left in this one.”
Hax tugs at the blanket draped over the back of the couch. A flourish later and he has it draped over Zye. He watches the sleeping face grimace and he can’t help himself. He shouldn’t. And yet, he does.
“I’ll have to see if she has a backup just in case. Until then…perhaps this will help until you’re ready.”
Walking past, he stops and brushes Zye’s bangs back. His palm presses against Zye’s forehead. A slight glow outlines his fingers as he leaves it there until the cool skin turns hot. Pulling away, Hax keeps moving. He has to get his shoes and leave.
This kind of development means he has things to prepare within the next month. One of those things is making sure Jace is ready to play his part.
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30Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZv2gSoC8dt
For the last two days, Jace hasn’t been able to get in touch with Zye other than a message here or there. The only reason he hasn’t been too worried is because Shae or Callua haven’t alerted him to anything. It’s bad enough that it takes a ridiculous amount of energy to even make the phone work if he’s too far away.
It’s why he’s quick to finish his job, a meeting with Hax, and catch up on a mission with Gray all so he can get here today. Even arriving in the world has him anxious. It doesn’t help that finding a place to pop into existence is usually complicated.
There are always people looking where they shouldn’t. Especially this time of day with the sun hanging high in the sky. In fact, there’s not a cloud in sight. It really is a beautiful day. Perfect for taking someone out into the city even. At least, that’s his plan— their plan.
Jace reveals himself beside the wall Zye takes to get to the park without having to go the normal path. No one tends to notice whoever is near it, usually children. Heading over to the house, he gets close enough to see the door opening. For a moment he expects it to be Zye. Instead, it’s Shae who walks out.
There’s a somber look to his body language that Jace takes note of. He moves a little closer before speaking up. “Is everything okay?”
“Huh? Oh, Jace, hey.” Shae stops turning the key to the apartment mid-lock and instead pockets them. He gives a shrug. “It’s just rough today. If you had something you two were going to do, I don’t think it’s happening. He’s having a hard time.”
“Sick?”
“No, well…Just symptoms acting up. You’re welcome to go in but it might be better to leave it be. If he already tried to bite my head off, not sure you’ll fare much better. I can tell him you stopped by.”
Jace doesn’t hesitate despite the change in Shae’s attitude. It’s the first time that he’s acted like this toward him. He moves straight for the door and begins to open it. “Don’t worry about it. Go on, I can handle it.”
Shae gives him a stern expression. They’ve gotten along well enough which is why Jace is surprised when Shae walks up to him. He’s close enough that he has to look up to meet Jace’s eyes and to where he doesn’t have to speak loudly at all.
“Okay…look. I can barely get him to respond to me right now. So if there’s even a tiny bit of doubt, leave. This is more than just going to the doctor or cuddling when someone doesn’t feel great. I’m serious, Jace. I know you probably mean it but…maybe just tell him you can’t today.”
“I’m glad he has someone like you looking after him,” Jace replies as he turns away from Shae. “I am serious about this and I’m not leaving when he needs me most.”
Shae clenches his hands into fists. It hurts to even say. It hurts more to know he could be the last one standing among all of his Chroma friends. None of this gets easier. Worse when he wishes he had someone to say that to him, too.
“Jace, I don’t think he has long. That usually means he’s gonna try to push everyone away like usual when something goes wrong.”
“Then I just need to be here more.”
Turning around, Shae stares at Jace’s back. There’s little he can tell from Jace’s body language. Not that he’s ever been good at that anyway. He trusts Callua if anything and she trusts Jace. It never mattered to him if Zye was really in love. As long as he was smiling and still here that’s all that he needed. He just didn’t want Zye to get hurt in the long run.
Dying is hard enough.
Dying alone is harder.
Shae takes a deep breath. “I’m thinking of taking him to Kass if he’ll let me. He’d be taken care of till the end.”
“I’m aware of the arrangement. If you do, let me know if I’m not already there.”
“Sure. If you need me to bring anything home let me know. Or if anything happens I’m not far away.”
Jace partially turns back to him with a reassuring smile. “Same to you.”
He watches Shae leave before entering the apartment. It’s a slow departure that gives Jace a chance to steady himself. After all, that isn’t what he expected from Shae. The news that he’s thinking of taking Zye to Kass says a lot about how the other man must be feeling today. If Shae is going to warn him then the two must have gotten into it to top it off.
A drop in the bucket to his seemingly endless lifespan compared to what they’re going through.
The entire place is quiet. There’s not a single sound that reaches Jace’s ears as he makes his way through. From the entryway, to the living room, and to the ajar bedroom door in the hallway. He gives a soft knock on it and waits for a sound from the other side. When none comes he gives the door a little nudge to open it.
“Zye?”
There’s a mumbled reply he can’t quite make out. It prompts him to slip into the dimly lit room. He turns the light on a little bit more and pushes the door shut. Jace slips out of his jacket and drapes it over a nearby chair. It doesn’t bother him that it slides off, landing on the floor instead.
Silver eyes are focused on the huddled-up form on the bed. The thick comforter is pulled up over Zye’s head. Not an inch of the man can be seen much less heard. He stops beside the bed and brushes a hand over the comforter in an attempt to figure out which part of Zye he’s touching.
“What can I get you?”
“I’m fine.”
His voice is hoarse and cracking. It breaks Jace’s heart just to hear it. Why did it suddenly get worse? What in the world could have triggered him to go downhill like this while Jace was gone? It’s frustrating to not have answers.
“Shae said you weren’t feeling well. How about we just relax here instead?”
“No, just…not tonight.”
“Do you need something? I can go get you dinner if you’d like.”
He tries to reach out, his hand falling onto the blanketed shoulder. At least, what he believes is a shoulder. But it’s the final straw to whatever started with Shae. Zye’s irritated enough that he throws the cover back and knocks Jace’s hand away.
Jace doesn’t expect the pale complexion or the dark bags under his eyes. The very things that are red and puffy from tears he’s already shed. Lips are bitten into and chapped, showing just how anxious he must be right now.
Zye glares up at him. “I’m really not the best company right now, can’t you get that? Just go away.”
“I told you it doesn’t matter to me. When someone isn’t at their best that usually means that’s when you need someone else the most.”
“This isn’t I just don’t feel good or I’m a little dizzy.” He grips at the bed with a hold that makes his knuckles go white. “I’m in so much pain I want to cry. I haven’t had a shower in three days. And I’m this close to punching whatever gets in my face next.”
Jace takes a step back as Zye swings his legs over the edge of the bed. “I’d leave but I don’t think you should be alone if you feel that bad.”
Zye stands. Toe-to-toe with Jace, he glares at him. He’s so incredibly frustrated. He’s never felt this horrible. Never once has he thought he’d show anyone just what a mess he can be. Especially the one person he’s begun to care about more than anyone.
His hands hit Jace’s chest, weakly pushing him back. Except the only thing it does is make him teeter. Jace doesn’t budge at all. There’s only a worried gaze on his face as he reaches out for Zye.
Jace steadies him, making sure he doesn’t sway to the point where he drops to the floor. Doing so only has Zye getting more irate. He pushes away from Jace, again, only to take a step back and end up on the bed. His hands brace his short fall so that he only bounces slightly. The entire time he’s trying not to look up at Jace.
“I can’t do anything for you, why are you still here?”
He takes a deep breath. Zye isn’t in the right mood— he’s breaking down. It makes him wish he hadn’t ever left his side. “Because I’m here for you. Not because I want you to do anything.”
Zye lowers his head with a laugh. “You just don’t get it. I’m human and I’m dying. You can’t fix that. It’s getting worse and that means I’m not fun to be around— I can’t keep pretending for you. At the rate I’m going I’ll end up at Kass’s and holed away until I die.”
“If you don’t want me here I’ll leave. Until you can tell me that, I’m not moving.”
Jace drops to one knee. He reaches out for Zye’s hands but the man quickly moves them away. Instead, he settles his palms against Zye’s knees.
“It hurts to see you like this, but my love for you isn’t weak enough to not be able to handle it. I don’t want you to pretend, ever. I’ll take every bad day no different than every good one. Let me have them, please.”
The last straw snaps and Zye shoves Jace sideways. Jace takes it in stride, lets Zye vent his frustrations and get it out of his system—not that it hurts in the slightest. Even if it means he ends up on his back. He watches as Zye stands, stumbles, and falls to a knee over his lap. Zye leans over him with one hand curling into the front of his shirt.
“I was fine with dying alone. I didn’t mind that I’d be forgotten and no one would care. No one would wonder, hey where did Zye go? But here you are…you…” Zye meets Jace’s gaze, those dual-colored eyes swirling with emotions and tears that bead up at the corners. “I’m scared. I’ve finally got what I want. I…I got to pretend I was normal. I have Cal and Shae. I still have Kass and Len. I have people that laugh with me…And I have you.”
Jace goes to reach up only to stop when the tears begin to drip down over flushed cheeks. The eyes he stares up into are so sad, lacking the bright glimmer they usually have. It makes him hate the fragility of mortals. He can only imagine that this has been building up for a while now. Looking back, he should have seen the signs and broached this sooner.
“I just don’t want to go. I h-hurt Xerxes so much and I can’t even make it up to him! He sends me updates on how well he’s doing and I-I miss him! I don’t even think I can make it to his graduation now. I…I don’t think I will.”
Slowly he crumples forward. The fist relaxes into fingers that so desperately cling onto Jace’s shirt. His shoulders are shaking as he tries to not let the sobs out. Tears are fine. Choking back the pain, sure. If he loses it now he’s not sure he’d be able to get back up let alone talk.
“And…you won’t leave. I know you won’t. You’re too stupid to run away while you have the chance. Save yourself the heartbreak.”
Jace’s hands brush up Zye’s sides, along his arms, and settle up onto his cheeks. He pushes the man to sit up more. Jace wants to see the tear-stricken face and reddened eyes. This vulnerability is something he desires to protect. There’s nothing more he wants to do than show Zye that it’s okay to not be okay sometimes.
“Do you know why I won’t leave?”
Zye’s brows furrow and his lips draw into a thin line. He swallows hard before giving a slow, small shake of his head.
“It’s because you’ve shown me that I can be a better version of myself. One where I don’t hate myself for what has happened or I can’t control. And I want the same for you. I want to inspire you the way you do me.”
One hand slips away, rubbing at the back of Zye’s neck.
“Love…is full of hardship. But that’s why there’s someone else there to carry the burden with you.” A smile touches the corners of Jace’s lips; soft and warm like the morning sun. “Even if you stop feeling for me…there’s always going to be a piece of me that’s going to love you— love you for forever and more.”
“But I—”
“No buts. I’ll always fight to be right here at your side no matter what. You shouldn’t have to be alone through this. I’m not letting you sit here and hurt alone.”
Zye pushes away from Jace and he’s allowed that much. His movements are unsteady and his body trembles from the pain. But he wants to sit to the side so that Jace can get up. Leaning against the bed, Zye sighs heavily.
“It’s just going to hurt you…”
Jace chuckles as he sits up. “I can handle it. Disease or not, you’re still mortal. I knew what I was getting into. Besides…I may have an offer for you. I’ve been thinking about it. A lot more lately considering how you’ve been doing.”
He stands and extends Zye a hand. Helping him to his feet, Jace feels the lack of a grip and sees the way he wobbles. Jace can’t believe Zye’s gotten so bad off. It hasn’t been that long— is that really how powerful this disease can be?
Was he hiding his symptoms as best he could? Has he been in this much pain all this time? How could he have not noticed that Zye was…
He doesn’t even want to think about it.
Zye lets Jace help him into bed. There’s no sense in fighting him at this point. Jace gets him comfortable before stripping off his own boots. All he can think about is climbing onto the bed next to Zye. Once he’s on his back, he beckons Zye closer until the man is curled up against his side. Purple and blue eyes look up at him; full of emotions that he can only imagine are spinning out of control.
“I want you to think hard about what I’m going to offer. It’s a loaded question. And even if you say yes you can always change your mind later.”
Jace takes a deep breath and meets Zye’s eyes, holding the gaze there. He had hoped to talk to Zye about this while he’s not overcome with emotions. However, it might be one of the few things that can ground him again. It’s worth a try.
“You can come with me, be like us. There’s responsibility, but I wouldn’t dream of putting it on you until you were acclimated completely and— Haa…right, slow down. Just think about it and if you have questions or when you’re ready to choose I’ll be here either way.”
“I…Just like you?”
Jace reaches down and grabs one of Zye’s hands in his. Fingers lace together with a tight squeeze. “I’m sorry…I know it’s selfish. Especially when you don’t feel good. I should have waited until the morning. It’s not exactly a light at the end of the tunnel unless you want it to be. Just…we’ll talk more over the week about it, okay?”
“I don’t mind. I guess…what would happen to my life here?”
“We’d have to figure it out— together.”
Zye looks away. His gaze settles on the large, warm hand against his own. The information— the proposition— is overwhelming. He doesn’t know yet he does. His heart yearns to say yes and cling to this man. His head tells him to listen and think, to not jump before looking. To take his time.
Time.
Time isn’t a luxury he has.
Instead, he settles for something else. He was feeling exhausted even before Jace showed up. The argument with Shae took it out of him already. He doesn’t just have Jace here now but he also has another path he can choose? It’s enough to have him calming down, letting himself relax if only a little.
“Are you leaving, then?”
Holding onto him a little tighter, Jace leans his head back on the pillow. “No, I’m staying right here while you need me. You’re more important than whatever I need to do.”
Jace lets Zye bury his face against his shirt. He lets the mortal think he doesn’t hear the whispered thanks or feel the quiet shaking of his shoulders. The emotions are too much for him; the fear forces the tears up and out with no remorse. What Jace doesn’t realize is there’s relief mixing in with it.
That there might be a chance to not have the fear take hold. That the space they’ve created has allowed him to be vulnerable, to let the emotions out without worry.
Jace stays even after Zye has worn himself out. Sleep has grabbed hold of him finally but it makes no difference to Jace. There’s still pain etched through him and it’s a pain that Jace can’t fix. Not entirely at least.
He’s never asked any of them about how to accept a soul under his wing but Hax is willing. He knows Charmilla will berate him. She’ll scold him even and tell him to give up that nonsense. But he doesn’t care. He’ll try it if it’s what Zye wants. Besides, there’s nothing for Jace to lose in trying. Nothing for either of them to lose at this point.
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30Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLHbIJBt9EX
The following evening finds Zye doing a little bit better. Mentally he’s over the moon despite the bleak side of his situation. Of course, it’d be better if Jace would get back already so he can talk to him about it more. They spent all of last night and this morning enjoying their time together.
All up until he left to go get them dinner while Callua sits with him. Not that he minds, he has missed her company. Still, he’s a bit nervous when she flicks the television to mute while the commercial airs between programs. Zye knows he should poke at the subject first, he just can’t help but worry about what she’ll say. Just because she’s his friend doesn’t mean she’d approve.
“So…are you staying long?”
Callua huffs at that and gives him a playful glare. “What? Trying to get rid of me now that he’s not busy?”
“No! I just…well…So, uh, he made me an offer.”
The light-hearted expression falls almost immediately. Callua sighs while setting the remote on the table. Sitting next to him, she leans back against the cushions. “And?”
“He, you know, said he’d make me like you. Whatever y’all are. It sounds good and I know it’s not a perfect offer. But I…I don’t know. He won’t get in trouble for this right?”
Callua hums. She wants to phrase this just right and Zye’s expecting and hopeful face isn’t helping in the slightest. Regardless, it doesn’t feel right to lie to him about it either.
“It depends on who knows that you weren’t a star first. The fact that you’re skipping a step might rub some people the wrong way. We’re not supposed to associate with humans like this.”
She laughs at that, trying to lighten the mood.
“Of course, we all do. It’s hard to stop being human. But Jace won’t care what others think, he never has, not really. If living is what you want, he’ll make it happen. If not, I’m sure he won’t leave your side for a single second until you’re gone.”
"What about you?”
“Idiot. Obviously, I chose and keep doing so every day. I’m here aren’t I?” She smiles wide at the pout he gives her for calling him out. “Everyone has regrets, Zye. When you live as long as I have you just try to do your best.”
“Wait, he said you trained him. Are you older than Jace?”
“Technically? Yes. Physically? Nope!” Reaching over, she pokes his shoulder. “So, have you decided?”
Zye leans forward until the t-shirt rides up his back and his forehead is against sweatpants-clad knees. There’s a flush to his face and she can see the tips of his ears turning red as well. “I could have answered yesterday. But I’ll tell him soon, I can’t really afford to wait.”
“How are you holding up? I mean you seem to be in good spirits now.”
“I…yeah I guess I’ll be okay. Still hurts like a bitch but the meds are helping I guess. Maybe it was just a fluke it happened.” He tries to smile it off as he sits back up. Except, he can see the look in those orange eyes. She’s not buying it. “Look, it’s fine. I’ll be fine. How about telling me about your past, hm?”
“Yeah, no. That’s not happening.”
“Maybe when you’re ready? You know I’d listen.”
Callua chuckles at that. “You really are going to say yes to him.” The glare she gets has her mood lifting a teeny bit. She’s beyond worried. The fact that Zye’s happy is all that matters at the moment. “When you’re on the other side, I’ll tell you. But you owe me, too.”
“Huh? How does that make sense?”
“You get to know my secret past,” she replies while wiggling her fingers at him. To which he swats her hands away. “Just come explore with me. I’ll even train you, the Callua special.”
“I’d love that,” he says with a laugh. “But if it’s anything super tragic or out of a horror movie, you’re paying for dinner.”
Callua waves her hand. “No, no, nothing like that. Although, from what I’ve heard of Jace’s past , those little pieces would fit that description. Apparently, it was, uh, well it explains how he is sometimes.”
“What do you mean?”
“You know; overprotective and overbearing. Suffocating almost.”
“I don’t see it.”
“All you see is his ass, you don’t count. But it’s just the cards we get dealt. Some of us are luckier than others.”
Zye groans at that. He hates it, hates that it’s not inaccurate. Even so, it’s depressing. “You know, it still sucks. Sometimes I see people enjoying their life and smiling and being happy— I just get angry. I know people have it worse, but what’s my luck to get this shitty hand?”
“Jerk! Are you saying I’m not worth it?”
“What? No. I didn’t—”
Callua grabs at him and pulls him close. He can’t stop the momentum as he ends up tugged against her, falling with her onto the cushions. She laughs all the way while his face nestles against her chest.
“You shouldn’t diminish your pain like that. That’s why you have friends, lean on us a bit more. Okay?” She pats his head, refusing to let him pull away. “I’m sorry I haven’t been around much, though. I really do love your dumb ass. Promise.”
“Right back at you. I’m not sure why I do when you’re trying to suffocate me with these things.”
Laughing hard at that, Callua slaps his back with one hand. She can hear the door opening and eagerly holds on until Jace comes around the corner. He has a perfect view of their shenanigans with both hands clutching paper bags of food. He can only sigh.
“Heh, jealous?” she asks with a grin.
He knows damn well she’s poking at him and he won’t dare let her. “Not in the slightest.”
Zye tries to pry himself away only for Callua to follow him, still clinging tightly. “Really? You’re not mad that my chest is so much softer for him to cry into?”
“How about taking this stuff to the kitchen? I got your order, too.”
Her eyes light up at that. She lets Zye go and jumps to her feet. Whisking the bags away from Jace, she makes her way to the kitchen. Meanwhile, Jace sits down next to Zye.
“Is everything alright? If you’re having a hard time you can go lay down or—”
“I wasn’t crying, I’m fine. She’s just pulling your chain again.”
“Ah…good. Then I got an extra side that I know you like.”
From the kitchen, Callua snickers while separating all the containers. “What, are you going to feed him while you’re at it?”
“If he wants me to, sure.”
Zye drags a hand over his face. The fingers squeezing at his knee give him comfort despite the embarrassment. It doesn’t help that Shae is yawning his way out into the kitchen.
“What’s all the racket? I was sleeping.”
Callua holds out a container to him. “The idiots are being cute and one of them bought us dinner.”
“Now that’s what I like to hear.”
About to stand, Jace dips his head down first. He gives Zye a chaste peck on his cheek. “I’ll go get your food.”
Except Zye grabs his hand the second he does. “Wait. Um…can I talk to you first? In private?”
Jace says nothing else. He stands and waits for Zye to do so as well. He follows behind with a vigilant gaze. He might be more worried about the man than he should be. But life is precious and fragile— something that’s becoming more and more apparent as the seconds tick by.
The door shuts behind him and Zye is immediately turning around. He meets Jace’s gaze with nothing short of genuine determination. He’s dead serious as he utters the word, “Yes.”
“What do you mean?”
“Dummy. I said yes, I want it. I’ll stay with you and we’ll figure it out. I mean you said I could always change my mind. But I should have— wanted to— say yes when you offered.”
Jace takes a step back only to bump his back against the door. He hadn’t expected an answer so soon. He also expected it to be a no. Suddenly, his thoughts are racing at a mile a minute while trying to figure this out. There’s so much he needs to do to prepare for this.
“We’ll have to plan carefully. I need to figure out how to make sure no one realizes— on both sides.”
“Jay, it’s fine. I…um…was wondering if I could stay here for a few months with everyone. I just need to see Xerxes graduate like I promised then I’ll leave with you. I swear I mean it!”
“You really are an idiot.” Jace grabs onto Zye and yanks him forward. The embrace is tight and unrelenting. He loosens it only to make sure he’s not hurting the other man. “It’s fine. I’ll make it happen. I’m just…happy.”
“So…it’s okay if I do?”
“I have some support behind me. He’s told me how I can do this. The most I’ll have to do is take you there after the change and then you can come back until you’re ready to leave.” Jace gives a hum of thought at that. “I can plan for it soon, the next couple of days maybe. I just have to make sure no one bothers me.”
Zye hugs him back. He curls his fingers into the back of Jace’s shirt with all he has and holds onto him. His anchor— one of the many lights in the ever-stretching darkness around him.
“Thank you. Seriously I don’t…I don’t think I can thank you enough.”
Smiling down at him, Jace spares a hand to lift at Zye’s chin. His lips dust over Zye’s. “I should be the one saying that. Now let’s go before your food gets cold.”
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