Coming to, Zye can’t fathom how he made it to Kass’s room much less into her bed. He sits up slowly with a groan. “The hell…”
“Stupid boy, I told you to be careful.”
“What happened?”
Kass sighs as she sits on the edge of the bed. She reaches over and takes his hand. “What do you remember last? How were you feeling?”
Zye tries to think back. He takes a deep breath and allows her to pat his hand. “I was coming back inside from escorting a woman to her car. I felt…okay? A little off but that’s normal these days.”
“You collapsed dear. Dropped like a sack of potatoes and scared Jin to death. Thankfully, he caught you. He’s worried sick about you and so am I. I think…we need to talk about the long term.”
“Kass, I’m fine. I just didn’t eat this morning.”
She levels a glare at him. “We both know you’re a horrible liar so don’t try.”
Zye lowers his gaze to his lap. He follows the waistband on his jeans in an effort to stall— to gather his thoughts if anything. The fact that he blacked out scares him to death, too. The closest he’s come is the day Xerxes tracked him down to Shae’s.
Kass smiles softly and takes one of his hands in both of hers. “I’ll be blunt with you. If things are going to get worse, I’d rather have you here with me. I want to make sure you’re taken care of without having to send you to be with Dr. Len.”
“We just want what’s best for you.”
The new voice has Zye looking up and he sees Shae standing from the couch. He’s moving toward Zye to hand him his phone.
“You have a few messages.”
It’s a surprise to see him there, sure, but he doesn’t pay it much mind. Not when the first name he sees is Jace right above Callua. He checks it and is happy to see the reply. Turning his attention back to Kass and Shae, he flashes a smile. “I’m fine, really.”
Shae crosses his arms over his chest. “We’re not trying to gang up on you. It’s just something that needs to be thought about.” He tosses Zye his beanie and turns. “I gotta get back to work. Call if you need me.”
It leaves him with Kass and the soft expression she wears. “We’re just worried, Zye. I don’t want you getting hurt when no one is around unlike today. It’s a miracle he got to you in time. Otherwise, you would have woken up in a hospital.”
“I…I get it. I do. I’m fine, though! If it did get bad, sure. Of course, I’d want to be here with you.”
Kass sighs as she stands. It’s only for a moment because she’s leaning back over the bed. She pulls him into a gentle hug. “Do you want me to have someone walk you home?”
“It’s okay. Jace was going to meet me after my shift anyway. He’s been waiting out back.”
“Then we shouldn’t keep him waiting.”
Stepping away, she watches him like a hawk. Every movement is scrutinized to determine whether or not he really is okay. Not that Zye pays it any mind. He’s swinging his legs over the side of the bed and pocketing his phone. Careful as he stands, he begins to tug the beanie onto his head, hiding all of his bangs in it.
Kass holds out her arm and is glad when he loops his with hers. Together, they walk back down to the first floor. Zye only lets go of her once they’re at the back door. He opens it and steps out, not surprised in the slightest that Kass lingers in the doorway.
“Hey there, Jace.”
“Hello, Kass. It’s a pleasure to see you.”
“Same. Now don’t let this one fool you today, keep an eye on him.”
Jace sweeps his gaze from Kass to Zye who is actively avoiding his eyes. “What happened?”
“Nothing—”
Kass leans against the door frame. “He collapsed. Lucky he was near someone who caught him. Fine, but I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him.”
“Is it safe for him to be walking?”
“Hey, I’m right here. And I’m fine. Can we go?” Zye tries desperately to interject but Kass won’t have any of it and neither will Jace.
She gives a little hum of thought. “Perhaps not. He’s lucky he’s got you coming to get him or he wouldn’t be leaving.”
“I understand.” Jace locks one of his arms with Zye’s. “Then we’d better get going so I can get him back in bed.”
Zye groans and begins to pull away, wanting out of this situation fast. “I’m not ten, come on you two.” He’s able to guide Jace away from Kass waving from the doorway. Once they’re far enough away, he bumps his arm against Jace’s side. “And you, I told you to wear a jacket. It’s only February, still cold here.”
“Sorry. I was in a hurry.”
He doesn’t really mind. Not when the black t-shirt lets him have skin contact. The warmth radiating from Jace is welcomed. It feels so good he can’t help but lean a little closer as they walk.
“Were you out saving souls again?”
“Yes, and meeting with stars that need help.”
“Is everything okay?”
Jace glances over at him. “Yes and no. A lot is happening right now. Not everyone has the best intentions.”
“Pfft, got that right. Oh!” Zye fishes into his jacket pocket and pulls out a key on a silver ring. He holds it out to Jace. “Shae and I figured you should have a key. Ya know, in case of emergencies and stuff. Cal has one, too.”
“That means a lot.”
Zye flashes him a wry smile, “Really? You can teleport right into my room and this means a lot?”
Jace blushes at that. He’s never even thought of doing it— not without Zye’s consent anyway. Taking the key, he’s just putting it into his pocket when Zye stumbles. Jace yanks him closer to keep him from falling. He stops moving the instant Zye is about to walk again.
“Let me carry you.”
“What? It’s broad daylight and you want to carry me home?”
“Please. It’d make me feel better.”
“Jace, I’m okay. And we’re more than halfway there. Lighten…up…” Zye cuts his eyes away from the look on Jace’s face. He’s so concerned that it has Zye unable to deny him what he wants. “This is so stupid. Fine. But you owe me one.”
Laughing at that, Jace lets him go and squats down. “Sure. Now come on.”
It takes a moment for Zye to even muster up the courage. He knows Jace is strong, but that doesn’t deter his doubts. Still, he keeps to his word and climbs onto Jace’s back with arms wrapped securely around broad shoulders. He has to get used to the arms looping back to hoist him up and brace beneath him. All he can do to help is not struggle.
“See? It’s not so bad,” starts Jace once he begins to walk.
“Yeah, uh-huh. Are you sure I’m not too heavy? I mean—”
“Light as a feather.”
“Liar.”
Zye leans forward and rests his head on one of his arms. It lets him breathe in the scent of a campfire, the only thing he can compare it to. It confirms what Jace already said— he was working prior to this.
“Are you sure you’re okay? You’ve been dipping out a lot these days.”
Jace sighs at that. Something he finds he’s been doing a lot of lately. “I’m okay. It’s just certain areas are a bit more active than usual. I’d rather not have to run out after saying I can hang out either.”
“I didn’t mean it like that, just, I was…ya know…worried.”
“No need, I can handle it. I do have Cal and my friend Gray to help me. They’re more reliable than anyone else.”
“Huh, I’ll tell her you said that.”
Laughing, Jace adjusts his hold as they enter the cul-de-sac. “By all means. I think she needs to hear it more.”
“So…do you have to leave today?”
There’s a pause. Enough of one that Zye already knows the answer.
“I don’t mind, was just wondering if you wanted me to order food or anything.”
“You know I don’t have to eat. I’d say you were thinking of something else.”
Zye lets his arms hang to where he can tap a hand against Jace’s chest. “Like you’d blame me. Have you looked at yourself lately? But, no, not really.”
“Did Kass say something that upset you?”
The question hits the center of the bullseye and Zye can’t deny it fast enough. Certainly not when they pass over the sidewalk and step up toward the porch. It’s there that Jace begins to lean back down, allowing Zye to slide off his back. Once Jace turns to him, he answers.
“She wants me to come live with her.”
“Because of how you’re feeling?”
“Yeah…I mean. I wouldn’t mind but I’d rather her not know when I’m dragging you up to my room to have sex. ‘Cause once I’m there, she won’t let me out of her sight. I know it.”
“You’re a handful.” Jace shakes his head. “What do you want?”
“I guess…I want to stay here as long as I can.”
“Then tell her that. If things take a turn then you can go live there. I wouldn’t mind having to go there either. She’s interesting to talk to.”
Zye brushes his fingers against Jace’s. He rubs one of his fingers between two of his and he knows exactly what it does to Jace— what it does to him. Zye hates that he knows Jace is about to leave. It’s been so sporadic these days and he’s worried. He’s barely hearing from Callua as it is.
“Don’t worry. I’ll go lay down and do something.”
“Promise?”
“Only if you seal it with a kiss. And you better mean it.”
“You can be such a child.” Jace is already moving in for it with a smile despite his reply. He doesn’t put much into the kiss. A simple and chaste little tap that has Zye pouting when he pulls away. “I’ll give you something better when I see you again.”
“Ass. Get out of here before I kick you.”
Jace places a kiss on his cheek before doing just that. He takes a few steps backward, watching as Zye gets into the house. It’s only once he’s sure the man is inside that he actually leaves. A quick look around to make sure no one is outside allows him to hide his presence and open a portal. One he quickly steps through.
It takes him to the basement of one of the many havens he’s helped set up throughout the worlds. Not that he particularly cares for this one. The outside is full of snow and a destroyed city. This place, however, is safe from all of that as long as they don’t leave up the stairs and out the hatch.
Otherwise, it’s a bit depressing with its cots strewn about the large cement basement. Normally there’d be stars of both kinds here. But not today, it’s just the two he’s promised to meet. Callua sits on the ground with a long burgundy coat tugged around her body. Standing next to her is Gray looking the same as usual save for a pair of pants versus shorts.
“Sorry, I’m late.”
Gray shakes his head, “We haven’t been here that long.”
“We have, don’t lie to him.”
To save Jace from the scolding, Gray is quick to pick up the topic. “The safe houses are lined up and secured. There’s plenty of stars moving through them already and it seems like we have more on our side than anyone realizes.”
“I’m not surprised. Not many want to go against the grain and upset the balance.” Jace tugs the bandanna from his back pocket and begins to fold it. “Anything else?”
Callua shakes her head. “No. But…do you think it’ll come down to having the big guys get off their high horses?”
"Sooner or later, yes.” Jace sweeps most of his hair up and ties the bandanna around his head. “Right now we need to figure out what Soren is up to. Something isn’t adding up.”
“I can get on that more. He’s had me running countless errands. But I’ll see what I can do,” replies Callua.
Gray straightens up, pushing away from the wall. “What would you like me to do?”
“Nothing. Stay safe and hidden. I might try speaking with Charm about it again.”
Callua is quick to interject. “She’s pretty upset with you for continuing to ditch your reports.”
“Why? What did she say?”
He’s curious. Considering how their last meeting went? He can only imagine how irritated she is with him. Callua shakes her head.
“Seriously? I can’t keep covering for you. You know how she feels about mingling. I can tell her I don’t know where you go but she knows I’m lying.”
“Yet she lets you get away with it.”
“I look up to her, Jace, I don’t live with her. And you know why she’s worried. She doesn’t want you to be another Daichi. Not…not that I think you would be.”
Silence settles between the three of them. Gray doesn’t want to broach the subject further. Jace doesn’t want to admit how hurt he feels that she thinks he’d go that route. All in all, Jace tries to shake the feeling. Especially since he will have to go speak with her. He doesn’t want to be agitated before he even gets there.
“What about Hax? Any more reports on his movements?”
Gray speaks up first. “I have someone tailing him for you as we speak. He seems to be enjoying the worlds and walking around with the mortals when he’s not in Solis. He’s not hard to keep up with.”
“That’s fine, let me know if anything changes.”
Jace turns to leave. He can’t stay here any longer if they’re going to make progress with any of the leads they have. Except Callua is eager to stop him in his tracks.
“Jace, how is—”
“You should go see him.”
“It’s…getting more frequent isn’t it?”
“It is.”
“Is this about the human you’ve been dating?”
The question has both Callua and Jace turning to look at Gray. Jace can’t believe it. What they’re talking about surely can be figured out from some context clues. But that doesn’t mean Gray should know. He turns a glare onto Callua who immediately puts up her hands in defense.
“I may have spilled the beans. But only to Gray!”
“I can’t believe either of you.”
Gray steps forward. There’s a look on his face that neither of them sees very often. He’s the brawn to keep them safe afterall. He’s been thinking and devising some sort of solution, something he’s very good at. “If you don’t mind my prying, he’s dying correct?”
“Yes.”
“Then have you proposed welcoming him into the fold? I know it’s not usually how it’s done, however, one of the Keepers in Noctis has a Guardian as well. I don’t see why it’d be an issue here.”
Callua glances between the two of them, jaw going slack. “You…you can’t be serious…”
Gray nods, “Completely. If that’s what he wants, of course.”
“I…had thought of it, yes.”
Callua steps forward, hands gripped into fists at her side. “Jace!”
He meets her eyes and he sees it; the concern and fear in those tangerine-colored eyes. She’s worried about him for all the right reasons. In the same breath, he wishes she would trust him a little more. Trust that he would never do that to someone.
“It wouldn’t be like what Daichi did. This would be legit.”
“And do you even know how?”
“I don’t. Charm made sure not to ever tell me. But—”
“But what?”
“I can ask Hax.”
Callua goes quiet at that. The mere mention of that man’s name has her sulking already. Not that Jace can blame her. She walks beside Charmilla— there’s no way she’d ever approve or like Hax in any way. The bias is already too well ingrained. Jace, however, doesn’t have that. It means Gray is the one that speaks up first.
“Are you sure he’d help?”
“I think he would.”
Wringing her hands, Callua appears more than just a little uneasy about it all. “I still don’t know, Jace. Even with everything that’s going on? Charm would be furious.”
“I’d have Hax on my side.”
Gray picks up where Jace leaves off. “And you’d just have to avoid Kerse. If she thinks there’s new blood in the ranks, she’ll show up and hunt you down to ‘test’ him.”
Jace steps away and begins to conjure a portal. The swirls of orange lick up from the ground behind him. “I’ll talk to him about it. I won’t do it unless he wants it. And maybe I can get Hax to help me hide the news when I do it. At least for a little bit.”
“We do have safe houses set up,” adds Gray.
Even so, Callua still has that expression. She’s immensely worried that this could go bottom up. Jace gives her a reassuring smile as the rest of the portal flares to life behind him.
“It’ll be fine. I’ll get in touch after I finish up this task and meet with Charm.”
Callua crosses her arms across her chest as if to hug herself. “Please be careful, Jace.”
“And let us know if you need anything.”
He nods to them each in turn and slips away. Clearing out Nether is exhausting, but knowing he doesn’t have to meet Charmilla back at Solis helps. It means after he’s with her he can cleanse and hurry back out.
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The places where he meets Charmilla are always breathtaking. It makes him want to ask when she gets out to these places, what with everything being so crazy. But he also knows that things haven’t always been this tense.
This distant world, however, is far from all of that. At the summit of this grand mountain is a shrine reveling in the wealth of spring. White flowers sprout and cover everything they can touch. They’re the strangest things to Jace. They look like fingers flicking out in a clockwise motion around the bud.
So fragile yet gorgeous.
Especially with how the sunlight glints off of them and fills the forgotten shrine with warmth. It reminds him of memories he’s tried to tuck down, to suffocate beneath duty and service to these Infernals and Celestials. A long sigh slips from him as he sits on the edge of the shrine’s platform at that thought.
“Why are we meeting here again? I thought you said we shouldn’t repeat locations for safety reasons.”
A chuckle mixes with the air, giving it a lightness that has begun to spoil. She turns to him and shifts her gaze from the skyline to the sour look on his face. The long dark hair, strands cut at an angle from the right shoulder down to her waist, fans out around her. The motion has the heels of her boots clicking against the stone path.
“I thought you enjoyed the peace and quiet? Or are you having too much fun with the mortals lately?”
A hum of thought— a tune only she knows.
“Then again, you walked with them once. It’s hard to forget one’s life. I hope you’ve been taking care of yourself.”
He knows what she’s referring to. It’s the last thing that he wants to discuss. His past only has his body betraying him. The mind takes too long to recover from memories drudged up from the depths of a soul’s agony. It all resounds through his body like a bell’s chime through a cathedral.
“What did you call me for?”
“It seems he’s benched you more than I thought or prepared for. So, I’ve decided Callua needs to step up more. I need her to be on the Dark Surge’s heels.”
“Did something happen?”
The question has Charmilla’s face twisting. There’s anger lighting her pink eyes and a furrowed brow he’s never seen before. She’s usually so calm and dignified. Yet now she dons an expression that could rip the ground asunder with one strike of lightning.
“The Dark Surge attacked Celeste. I’ve already heard from them and they’ve told me they’ll be okay. But for now, they’ll be taking precautions. Leaving Noctis is out of the question now that the Surge is settling for ambushing.”
It’s shocking news. He can only imagine how many it took to overwhelm a Celestial. His attention is drawn to Charmilla as she steps toward him. The string of bright yellow gems tied to each tip of her curled horns jingles and shifts. Much like the trinkets still strung up along the shrine’s roof.
The breeze brushes past them and down into the awaiting trees. The air is crisp and cool, refreshing even. Jace catches himself wishing that every place was as peaceful as this. No fighting or scheming. Just beauty and serenity.
Charmilla continues while placing her hands on her hips. The white skirt rumbles from how tight her hold is. The frustration only grows more obvious. “Two of our insiders have reported the attacks on those who won’t choose a side has increased. However, there’s been also been another increase in Nether. An alarming number of high ranks in places that have been monitored and cleansed regularly.”
“Maybe I can get some information out of Hax or even Kerse if I get close enough.” He bites back what he really wants to say— that he already knows. That he’s been to a place that has seen that happening already and he’s been working his ass off to keep it safe.
“Thank you, Jace. You’re always so reliable.”
She turns, redirecting her gaze back to the sun. The glare of it has Jace having to cut his eyes away from her. The stark whites of her outfit are even more so in this lighting no matter how many dark accents are on it.
“Is there anything else you needed?”
“Can’t I just call you to talk? I’ve been worried. You’ve been sending fewer reports in.”
Jace leans back against the edge of the shrine. “You said it yourself that I’ve been benched.”
“That normally wouldn’t stop you. Are the mortals that much fun? They don’t make for bad friends I suppose.” She catches his gaze from the corner of her eye.
It takes everything Jace has to lower his eyes to the ground. His elbows rest on his spread knees with hands clasped together between them. He doesn’t want her to see him. He knows her stance on things. Things that relate to how much time he’s been spending with one particular mortal. She’s already given him a warning— a demand to cease his folly.
There’s no way he can tell her that he has feelings for Zye. It’s something he hasn’t felt in forever, not since he was alive. Not when she’s warned him already. Not when he knows she’d rather forbid him from leaving Solis should he admit it.
Charmilla is sharper than that. She can tell from his body language. He’s keeping something from her. Secrets lead to betrayal— something she can’t have happening right now. He’s slowly becoming an unknown factor and it’s setting her on edge.
“Jace, be honest with me. What have you been up to? Are you getting too close to the mortals? To the point where you would ask for time away and neglect your duties?”
The friendliness begins to ebb away. She sidesteps toward him with arms crossing beneath her bosom. He remembers this side of her all too well. She’s not just motherly in nurture. She’s motherly in putting her foot down and setting rules in stone. Except the motherly part is something that doesn’t seem as apparent now.
It’s the lack of an answer that seals it for her.
“You know full well that love isn’t for us. Eternity is a very long time. People quit and move on regardless of who they love. I’ve seen it happen countless times.” Charmilla places a hand on his shoulder. “Don’t do this to yourself, Jace, and not with a mortal soul that isn’t even in one of our ranks. You know better.”
It’s a lesson she’s drilled into him since the day he started working this role. The countless times she’s sat him down and explained that what he used to have, he can never allow himself to have again. Something that Hax always laughed at behind her back.
“I can just take him on as my Guardian if he wanted.”
The words fly off his tongue before he can stop them. Hell— he didn’t even think about them before they jutted out. Such a powerful suggestion has Charmilla physically recoiling. Her hand cups against the other as if he’s burned her.
“Don’t, you know better. This life isn’t something you should wish upon anyone. It can be exhausting, lonely, and trying. Only strong souls can carry this burden.” She rights herself; shoulders straightening, chin tilting up, and fingers waving the suggestion off. “I won’t allow it.”
Jace rises to his feet. Fingers curl in against his palms to either side of him. He can feel his body temperature rising. There’s heat beneath his skin and the fire inside dares to leak outward— the visage of his power wants to escape his control.
“It’s only because that’s how you’ve made it.”
“Jace, please. You’re still a child compared to us. You have so much growing to do. Don’t get attached to where you can’t let him go when it’s time. Do not make your selfish wish his regret.” She tries to step toward him, but his glare stops her mid-step. “I won’t allow you to do that to yourself.”
Of course, he’s thought about that. He’s not stupid. He hates everything about being alone doing these missions. Now that everything is falling apart, he can’t even work with other Keepers as he should be able to. He’s barely even met them.
The thought of dragging someone else into it is the last thing he wants. The words hold so much truth. Perhaps it’s the tone that has the ire building up to where he has to make sure he starts summoning a portal out of here as he backs away. But he can’t help it. He won’t let her talk down to him like that— not anymore.
“You know Charm, you’ve never lived a life. You’ve sat in your little castle with Kerse and Hax. You don’t understand anything.”
She notices the escape route he’s making. Notices how irate he is over the conversation. It concerns her so much that she tries to keep her voice even. “I know far more than you think.”
“No. You don’t. And you certainly don’t know me.”
“If you leave you’ll regret this, Jace. Come back with me to Solis and we’ll talk.”
“I’m not going anywhere but where I want to go.”
Charmilla sighs and steps toward him. He watches one arm fall to her side. Fingers spread and flex as if she’s going to summon her weapon— her power even. It has him realizing he’d better move fast unless he wants to evoke real anger from her. And once he does, he can’t come back any time soon.
He feels like a child rebelling against their parents— against any authority. But he won’t have the first thing he’s looked forward to be taken away from him. Never again.
A step back and Jace is already slipping into the portal. Before he goes he leaves her with one last thought to gnaw on. “I wouldn’t ever force anything on anyone. Not intentionally. Unlike the rest of you. It’d be his choice, not mine, and it’s the least I can offer to someone I care about.”
The energy dissipates and fades once he’s departed. Left alone in this rundown shrine, Charmilla pinches her eyes shut. Shoulders tense as lightning arcs across her fingertips. She’s enraged and wishes she had just met him at Solis, to begin with. Then she could have kept him there.
Regardless, there’s a sensation welling up in the pit of her being that she hasn’t ever felt before. She doesn’t know how to stop it or what to do.
All she knows is everything she thinks she can control is slipping between her fingers.
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