Nathan
I thought about it a lot, about everything happening at the current moment.
About Jessie being Harry's target, about Jessie blushing at every guy who walks by her, about her pains, and about what Rachel said.
But most of all, about Harry. And I thought about the solution. The perfect solution to each of them.
And I came to one conclusion; asking out Jessie.
It's a horrible mistake I know, but it's also a temporary solution to a) prevent Harry from doing whatever he is planning to do. And b) to make Jessie happier, even if it's just for a while.
So here I was. Standing in front of Jessie and uttering the stupidest three words I've ever said to anyone.
"Be my girlfriend"
This is the second time I have ever asked out a girl, the first time was- well I don't really like to talk about the first time since it wasn't that happy of a memory. But Jessie is the second girl I have ever asked out, her case is entirely different tho.
I don't feel nervous, or excited or anything as I used to feel when I asked out Ho- no Nathan, don't go there.
I'm not a playboy, I have never played with any girl's heart. I don't like to use girls for sex either, or have one night stands with them, even if it be their own choice too. I'm young and hormone driven guy , yeah. But that's not the right way to treat any girl.
If I do that, then I won't be able to stare my sister from shame. Who will be harassed and asked out by guys like me. And I wouldn't be able to dare stop her from doing what she wants. So I can't do that to Rachel.
But right now... I feel like I'm a playboy. I'm doing the exact thing which any play boy would do, lie to a girl, gain her heart, and throw her away after two months.
I immediately shake off the feeling of guilt, and tell myself this is for the better. This is the best solution and decision, this is to protect Jessie, and to not let her become like Rachel.
Jessie's eyes are widened, she is staring at my eyes, then she frowns and looks away. I can't read her expression, and I lick my dry lips, as I stare at her waiting for any reaction. But she just frowns and seems to be in deep thought.
I wait patiently for her, this might have been a big surprise for her, hell it was even a bigger surprise for myself. I never thought I would lie to a girl about my feelings.
"W-what do you mean?" Jessie finally speaks. Making me release the breath I hadn't realized I was holding.
"Be my girlfriend" I repeat, "let's go on dates, be romantically involved with each other. Have nice memories together."
Which are not a lie after all. I'll just pretend we're friends, it wouldn't remind me of lying to her. At least I hope so.
"Umm... it's not April's fool day, is it?" Jessie asks, seeming unsure as she stares at the wall behind me, where I guess a huge calendar is hanging on the wall.
I can't help but smile, it's so like Jessie to think I'm pulling a prank on her. I immediately remember it's because she has never been asked out, and she feels insecure. So my smile disappears.
"It's not Jessie" I mumble, and clear my throat. "I mean it, let's... umm date"
Jessie sighs, her frown still present on her forehead. Her arms crossed over her chest, she's biting her lower lip now and then from nervousness and anxiety. "It's... very sudden"
"I know Jessie." I say calmly, as I try to smile at her which doesn't reach my eyes.
"You're not.... perhaps pitying me, are you?" Jessie asks, her eyes studying every move I make. As she's trying hard to see through me.
"Of course not!" I lie. Because first; I am. And second; Rachel did tell me Jessie doesn't like being pitied.
"T-then why?" Jessie asks. She isn't frowning anymore, but looks surprised and a little shocked.
"Why what?" I frown as I try to understand what she means.
"Why are you telling me this now?" She asks, "why are you even asking me to be your girlfriend? And not just date you."
I swallow hard. Oh lord. I was trying my best to avoid the real lie. But then I have no choice. I have to, otherwise she won't believe me.
"Because I love you" I say. Without stuttering, without hesitating, and with a strong confident voice.
"S-since when?" She asks. I knew this would happen. I knew Jessie is not someone who immediately agrees, she has many questions. And I got ready for all of them.
"It doesn't matter." I say, "what matters is I love you, and I want you to be my girlfriend"
"B-but...what about Rachel?"
"What about her?"
"Won't she be against it?"
"No she won't" I answer, she has planned all of it herself. I add mentally to myself. "And it's not her business, although I'm pretty sure she'll agree, since she will want both of our happiness."
"Are you saying you'll be happy with me?" Jessie asked, her cheeks having a shade of pink on them.
"Yeah, I will" I say, which is not a lie. Jessie can be very fun to hang out with.
"Umm... Nathan. I appreciate what you say and all that," Jessie starts, "but I seriously need to think about it"
"Sure!" I reply as I smile at her, "let me know your answer later?"
"Yeah" Jessie says, as I walk away smiling to myself, forgetting about the feeling of guilt, because I knew Jessie has already agreed by giving herself time to think of it.
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