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我在書枱前呆了大半日。熱茶已涼，但我未嚐半口，心思都在眼前電腦屏幕上——剛輸入的文字不停被刪。字越少，心越亂，人越躁。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9PbVcm8hrC
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKZo5UO8RGE
不了。受不了。我離座往廚房換茶去。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ440NUp0I2r
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡao1wtEBg9B
廳中老妻瞄我半眼，大概知道發生甚麼事，沒有作聲，繼續看電視。我對她的不表態不勝感激——她以最聰明的方法維護我的尊嚴。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIb3oHUPjA6
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZM9KcTGoX5
滾水撞上茶葉，水仙香氣隨著冉升白煙溢散開去。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZbJ8Rms4Av
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAM6dWz4Thp
壓力似乎一併消散。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7c0BF4firX
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofwkhFG5GI
茶盡。我再續杯。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU1YBdfSM60
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVhPymbHLfD
添茶不是長遠之計——屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRPN5yCdPdE
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1pZaLwVnF
嘆一口氣，慨嘆自己太天真可愛。怎麼會相信自己有寫作天分，而且一信就是幾十年。幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我只得不停安慰自己說旁人不識貨。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcncZniMWxi
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI4aBppDwTw
口不對心。心裡其實清楚自己料子如何。但我還是堅持寫下去。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVw60Xflsgs
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjedZHL1sRy
是習慣、面子、尊嚴緣故，更是不想承認自己做了一個長達幾十年的白日夢。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiRsq2DGZ2G
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN9SVL7wGBh
夢醒一場空。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvL0oVrsigX
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtq76Cyc9Vx
我本平庸，無甚專長，唯獨寫作能力相對身邊友儕略高丁點。丁點而已，卻足以讓我樂透幾十年。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyMklMhHboZ
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPpT7GsOwaj
工作不順利時，我會告訴自己——我的專長不在工作上，所以被罵亦是無可厚非；人際關係不如意時，我會告訴自己——如果世人只能用文字溝通，我該是表達能力最好的人；走倒運時，我會告訴自己——我正在為快要誕生的偉大作品累積靈感……355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYQCsFdNLx0
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ggA7H5DR0
一切都是有意義的。如果我真有寫作天分的話。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTBph50TRL1
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO8mXVezH40
捧著熱茶回到座位。身在心在能力不在。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKWxDAaxQnN
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmV2FgDuXc2
在刺眼的屏幕白頁前，我又嘆一口氣。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIbEWE8zP3D
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtZcHtY6mG
我不曾長大，仍是幾十年前那個我，沉浸在中文老師讚賞的我。同學們紛表羨慕我的寫作天份，請教我如何想出精彩故事、練出動人文筆。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQ5qkEWKjJ
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsNjwc7Vb0e
我沾沾自喜。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmRe771qwuz
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdLmwehi0eN
細心回想，我當時已覺竅門不在天分，而是努力。努力鑽研文字的運用，努力細味名著佳作當中的韻味，努力思考故事情節起伏，努力觀察分析人世百態……名副其實的將勤補拙。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz3txRT9uYA
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgOX8FDHMeJ
但我沒有向同學們坦白。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ17dZFl11g8
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc0W5c3LTKI
因為我喜歡被讚賞的感覺。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWvrcvahtj7
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9MF1AkmZeC
努力，努力，努力。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnzBmOftxro
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2KMSBR5Io5
我的寫作技巧與日俱增，亦在多個學屆寫作比賽中獲獎。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡggf1LkHTNH
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy46BaxRzFf
我以為自己將來鐵定能夠成為作家。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZCLy5sn5Nj
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwCYUJrPWiF
以為。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8VsTxhciVa
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY68671cWe5
告別校園後，我成為一個普通文職。普通收入，普通打扮，普通生活。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡClS3y935nY
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM7nPbyJ0Nf
普通得輕易被取代。普通得難以承受。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrK3A4sLYNl
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHQxJ8hN5r5
我不得不告訴自己我是多麼的有寫作天份！我是多麼的獨特！355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTP6SkbfVbQ
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDRQ5taVk2r
某夜下班回家，我泡了一壺水仙，乘著茶香全情投入寫作世界。沒有外物打擾，我的世界只有我。一切如願。那麼順心，那麼安寧，那麼快樂。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5eG3dveHgU
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF76Msmq6KO
我的作品感動了我。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqJHasFBiQ
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwyASgJA3sr
我希望藉此找到更多懂我的人。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1aDXiIklC
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzvHf633S7m
幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我的世界與真實世界不斷相互碰撞。面對無止境的打擊，我不曾問自己為何堅持。因為一旦心生此等疑問，變相在內心種下「自我質疑」的根苗，一發不可收拾。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz2rqIJI6m7
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQqtg6FpL9k
無法接受自己幾十年堅持建基於一個沒可能實現的夢想。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeI60wdBjk7
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz3gnZfAA81
無法承受自己生來就是如此普通、平凡、平庸……355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaamNjZEOvQ
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4zKboB6Wi2
熱茶又涼了。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoO7jhQgTs0
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqIYOEFNZiu
屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1EJQNauksb
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLkdCUDpbgL
老妻繼續以不表態維護我的尊嚴。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ44LfKoz0FT
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz428l2OBEP
我的作品只感動了我。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLKDW4bKCnx
355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3X8lDxZq0
因為我的感受只有我讀得懂。355Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFdziYE01Et
