二十年前——441Please respect copyright.PENANAazVWrHCeA9
441Please respect copyright.PENANArx2vmf3wRm
小荷是個人見人愛的六歲小女孩,胖胖白白的臉配上一雙水靈大眼。她每天穿著荷媽親手做的一雙由彩色布碎拼湊而成的小鞋子到處玩耍,有時會跟同村的孩子們跑上山頭採菇,有時會為獨居老人送上新鮮採摘的漂亮花朵,有時會在湖邊遊蕩。441Please respect copyright.PENANAaAmInzcV2R
441Please respect copyright.PENANAEg8h4xauws
荷媽曾多次提醒她切勿走近湖邊,但小荷偏偏喜歡看蓮花,說蓮花是仙女的化身。荷媽忙著預備晚餐,不甚耐煩地反譏小荷幼稚。小荷不堪被譏諷,激動嚷著會帶蓮花仙女回家,然後頭也不回衝出家門。441Please respect copyright.PENANAApdcdf7klr
441Please respect copyright.PENANAD3VM8ijX5W
傍晚,晚餐備好了,小荷還沒有回家。荷媽心緒不寧,深怕小荷遇上意外。她挑燈外出,急步走往湖邊。441Please respect copyright.PENANAbOPSpUoEXk
441Please respect copyright.PENANAWBUrxpbbfU
小荷不在。441Please respect copyright.PENANAoZ9N30bszj
441Please respect copyright.PENANAw91MgOU4zN
荷媽的心頭涼了大截,連忙前去村長家求助。沒多久,大伙兒在湖邊叢林間搜索。441Please respect copyright.PENANAPfXYWZU2VT
441Please respect copyright.PENANAeNGFrxewxz
無發現。441Please respect copyright.PENANA72ONIpiKSv
441Please respect copyright.PENANAG3IzQYC3B0
村長打算重新部署搜索行動之際,有人指著湖中央的一朵蓮花大叫:「看!湖中那朵蓮花上有一隻鞋!」441Please respect copyright.PENANAL2DENnM9uv
441Please respect copyright.PENANAmEkNfJXA4i
大伙兒定睛細看,卻因光線不足而未能確定那是否一隻鞋。荷媽救女心切,不理眾人勸阻跳入湖中游向那朵蓮花。游著、游著,她的身影突然消失了。441Please respect copyright.PENANAhK77YmoYb5
441Please respect copyright.PENANAxkG2AwU8py
為免有更多人命犧牲,村民只得待天亮才落水找荷媽。不出所料,荷媽的腳踝被水草纏住,溺斃湖底。村民認得蓮花上的鞋子確是屬於小荷,但找遍湖底亦找不到她的身影。唯有繼續在林間搜索。無果。個多月後,眾人認為找到小荷的機會渺茫,於是停止搜索。441Please respect copyright.PENANA1xw02BwL5i
441Please respect copyright.PENANA2DGoTnK9OA
村裡開始流傳蓮花仙女帶走小荷的傳聞……441Please respect copyright.PENANACVViXwuKIy
441Please respect copyright.PENANA18JEzRQeKG
「那是在你出生前發生的事情?」阿夏一邊聽得著迷,一邊望著車窗外的油油綠草地,驚嘆著這寧靜山村背後竟有這種可怕事。441Please respect copyright.PENANAsZnR0nJXXo
441Please respect copyright.PENANA1rPDQ8aiBs
「不。當年我十歲,和小荷挺熟絡。」芙兒沒心情欣賞風景,逕自倚著椅背,微微仰首凝視車廂天花那色調偏冷的米光燈。441Please respect copyright.PENANAbb8nWGwtc2
441Please respect copyright.PENANABNm7V6yZuL
「小荷失蹤一事是你當警察的原因嗎?」阿夏與芙兒作伴數年,不難看出芙兒心事重重,尤其今趟「回鄉之旅」是離鄉別井十多年的芙兒主動提出,可見其別具意義。441Please respect copyright.PENANA0odEc1wJ5x
441Please respect copyright.PENANAilZ9B5Pd2D
「嗯……一部份吧。不能說是完全因為她,也不能說是與這事情毫無關係。」芙兒苦笑,些許後悔無故主動提及這大煞風景的陳年往事。回鄉目的不是向各位鄉親苦老宣佈自己與阿夏的婚訊和設喜宴嗎?不是要歡天喜地、眉開眼笑嗎?441Please respect copyright.PENANAXgBiEB11WW
441Please respect copyright.PENANAi0NmG8bNRM
「不管如何……」阿夏是個聰明人,明明對案件內容細節有興趣,但也知道要適可宜止。他輕拍芙兒的手背,安慰道:「事情已然過去,多想無益。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAxSTuUdbmcc
441Please respect copyright.PENANAFq9ylEpdz1
「是的。過去了。」芙兒吁一口氣,似是釋懷,奈何揪心的感覺難以單憑幾句安慰說話連根拔起。441Please respect copyright.PENANAxrpS1wyTAX
441Please respect copyright.PENANAx2su5n4ME2
顛著、簸著,好不容易來到村口。大城市發展一日千里,隱世小村亦逃不過時間巨輪的輾壓,已然根據政府的規劃建議打造成「山村旅遊區」。生來就是城市人的阿夏未曾到過農村,覺得這地方別具風味,但在村內待了十多年的芙兒卻嗤之以鼻:不也就是電視劇裡的假農村嗎?441Please respect copyright.PENANAtcotHr4NUt
441Please respect copyright.PENANAtC5A682fSw
驀地,一個想法在芙兒腦海掠過。441Please respect copyright.PENANAXMBd9S8PAi
441Please respect copyright.PENANAV9JT2Fh9uE
「阿夏。」芙兒拉拉阿夏的手袖:「我們先去蓮花池那邊看看吧。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAXtnY6CAOiA
441Please respect copyright.PENANARZPtS4ibL2
不出芙兒所料,蓮花池已面目全非。池邊的泥地與草叢變成了磚路與涼亭,上了漆的鐵製圍欄整齊繞池而立,蓮花換了個品種,顏色更亮麗奪目,尺寸亦比以往的大上數倍。唯一不變的是頭頂上的烈日,仍然熾熱得惡毒。441Please respect copyright.PENANAyMwNP1ulAY
441Please respect copyright.PENANAeKqLVLQ0wP
芙兒逕自繞著蓮花池逆時針方向拐圈踱步。時間彷彿隨著步伐逆行,日落月出,瞬間回到二十年前那個夜晚……441Please respect copyright.PENANAfvsuUyF0AZ
441Please respect copyright.PENANAuoMKuvt5uG
「我帶芙兒外出散步散心。」晚飯後,芙爸病懨懨地對妻子說。441Please respect copyright.PENANAWRGP3QuJPY
441Please respect copyright.PENANAtJYIbkT0zR
「嗯。」芙媽忙於照顧病兒,分身不暇。441Please respect copyright.PENANAxh8V3coqF8
441Please respect copyright.PENANAWbV7iN8UQo
夏夜有月,月下有蟬,蟬聲擾人又煩人。路上,芙爸眉頭鎖得更深。芙兒乖乖不作聲,默默尾隨他快步走。441Please respect copyright.PENANAifosNIphLh
441Please respect copyright.PENANA5qNJsZdTA7
「芙兒,你愛媽媽嗎?」441Please respect copyright.PENANACcx0oiHf76
441Please respect copyright.PENANAmdMiEAmyCY
「愛。」441Please respect copyright.PENANA7TwGzVxWQN
441Please respect copyright.PENANA7ckkFIZmht
「你愛爸爸嗎?」441Please respect copyright.PENANAYU0PGyi4VF
441Please respect copyright.PENANA7uLEvALndR
「愛。」441Please respect copyright.PENANA8Y0X8nnRIU
441Please respect copyright.PENANA8GiK3pwXjM
「你愛哥哥嗎?」441Please respect copyright.PENANAyJClSgBzRm
441Please respect copyright.PENANA9hDeRvGbOB
芙兒心裡一寒,不自已停下腳步——她早前無意間發現爸爸向前任村長秘密查詢有關人口販子的事。難道爸爸為了替哥哥籌措醫藥費而打算賣掉她?441Please respect copyright.PENANAd143sQjKMj
441Please respect copyright.PENANAtAwkQGOx3d
「你愛我嗎?」芙兒無力反問。441Please respect copyright.PENANAw049opkIpU
441Please respect copyright.PENANAEEZtJ5Z9Lf
芙爸沒有回答,繼續低頭開步走。441Please respect copyright.PENANAFHxZNsLVt2
441Please respect copyright.PENANA5QZU3m3Bi6
芙兒想要跑回家去,雙腳卻不由自主隨著爸爸走,縱然明知那是不歸路。441Please respect copyright.PENANAXGNwoeZxVR
441Please respect copyright.PENANAa69TGnZ77U
途經蓮花池,巧遇小荷。芙爸倏忽衝前打昏小荷。芙兒明白爸爸的意圖,連忙拉住他。441Please respect copyright.PENANAF5NzFB4HuY
441Please respect copyright.PENANAymaQjvZTMe
「小荷是無辜的!」441Please respect copyright.PENANAuOirYQmvPq
441Please respect copyright.PENANAM4kOLWwSYX
「但我捨不得你啊!」441Please respect copyright.PENANACeLxdhi8bM
441Please respect copyright.PENANApvgBDdYMqP
芙兒不期然鬆開了手——她聽得出話裡的割捨與堅決。爸爸向來善良老實,日子艱難亦不會做鼠竊狗偷的勾當。奈何今次關乎兒子的生命安危和女兒的命運!他寧可割捨良知,亦要保住家人。441Please respect copyright.PENANAWNVXL2yZYc
441Please respect copyright.PENANAcCBsVq7Woj
芙兒理解了、妥協了,芙爸眼神反倒更為悲憤不安。他脫下小荷的一隻鞋,使勁拋向蓮花池。鞋子剛好不偏不倚落在池中央的一朵大蓮花上。441Please respect copyright.PENANALLj1wXIshM
441Please respect copyright.PENANAqmq3amFKm2
父女兩人不約而同望向那朵大蓮花。純白蓮花被夜色沾污成帶有瘀青的淡灰色,悉才看來色彩繽紛的小鞋子亦被迫融入夜色,成了一個若隱若現的小黑點。441Please respect copyright.PENANAdcCKnCdJVu
441Please respect copyright.PENANAqSWbfXCGGY
小黑點,人生裡的大污點。441Please respect copyright.PENANAIit6uoPh3Q
441Please respect copyright.PENANAb9aGd7oJZh
來到約定的地方。人口販子沒有芙兒想像中的鼠頭獐目。他相貌平凡,打扮平凡,舉止平凡,有如田裡的一顆穀粒,獨一無二卻平凡普通。441Please respect copyright.PENANAQABoIG7JWq
441Please respect copyright.PENANA5viARCIKSG
二人無聲的奉上小荷,默默的收下金錢,不能見光的交易在無光的樹林中順利完成。441Please respect copyright.PENANAjyiLfOwwca
441Please respect copyright.PENANAH7YdVc7beg
芙兒自此在這夜池邊中無限輪迴。441Please respect copyright.PENANAufQUVRfwQk
441Please respect copyright.PENANAAaOKamkYrS
晝如夜,夜是夜。此人是小荷,那人是小荷,異裝同臉。池中有蓮,家中有蓮,路中有蓮,蓮上有鞋。441Please respect copyright.PENANAcBYcg3mn3c
441Please respect copyright.PENANAoSaEsr6vzv
瘋了。芙兒的世界瘋了。441Please respect copyright.PENANA6WrERE5eUD
441Please respect copyright.PENANAvkjxn8p161
需要救贖。無人能救。只得自救。441Please respect copyright.PENANAsGRcZyhVnA
441Please respect copyright.PENANAWmkRZZLQEk
救哥哥,犧牲小荷。救自己,犧牲誰?441Please respect copyright.PENANA58qxb23EJn
441Please respect copyright.PENANARUWO45LdM2
「記住,賣掉小荷的人是我,不是你。」441Please respect copyright.PENANA9RIDwyv4Cy
441Please respect copyright.PENANAPurjwQyw33
「我沒有阻止你。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAUfGCi4p8xQ
441Please respect copyright.PENANAf5FMQ6Ni3W
「阻止得了麼?」441Please respect copyright.PENANAwIhgTkyaDn
441Please respect copyright.PENANATVVDXgtNWD
「至少,我該要嘗試。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAYAAI1KdyEX
441Please respect copyright.PENANAoSp08efl9Z
「嘗試有用麼?」441Please respect copyright.PENANAGhJ8v3zej0
441Please respect copyright.PENANA7cpv66OOOk
芙兒如夢初醒——芙爸企圖獨自扛起一切責任,救贖芙兒。她不自控笑著流淚,內心得到救贖的同時又跌落另一深淵——自己得救,爸爸犧牲。441Please respect copyright.PENANAwP4kv1dsSX
441Please respect copyright.PENANAMtUsGHozPo
真的得到了救贖嗎?不肯定。441Please respect copyright.PENANARPPxunKkAb
441Please respect copyright.PENANArvUZ6ukDhD
她離鄉到城市尋找工作,輾轉當上警察。對失蹤案尤感興趣。找人,找救贖。找到人,找不到救贖。441Please respect copyright.PENANAiazi0D0loi
441Please respect copyright.PENANAi8ShDZU87k
收到來自家鄉的信,提及哥哥病逝。她丟掉信件,假裝未曾收到。根本沒意義,根本誰也沒能得救,無論犧牲多大。441Please respect copyright.PENANAtiokyZtbDL
441Please respect copyright.PENANAH9jr9m6AC0
芙媽來了,問芙兒為何不出席哥哥的喪禮。她說不知道哥哥逝世一事。芙媽低頭掩面大笑,笑了很久,然後哭了很久。「你爸說你不會為此回來,我說你不是狠心的人。原來我們都錯了——你根本不知情。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAhPGZm2C6O1
441Please respect copyright.PENANAtvZe1Q9Tnv
有甚麼值得笑或哭?芙兒不明白。或許媽媽也不明白,純粹為笑而笑、為哭而哭,無謂卻有為。至少她的情緒得以紓緩,面容不再繃緊。441Please respect copyright.PENANAAZTRprTXCT
441Please respect copyright.PENANAAdvZfMt4Wi
數年後,芙媽死了。芙兒同樣沒有出席喪禮。她向上司請假數天,躲在家裡,足不出戶。不斷憶起媽媽當日又哭又笑的癲狂模樣。真羨慕。沒有隱藏,沒有秘密。441Please respect copyright.PENANAXO4A1NrRD6
441Please respect copyright.PENANAdDvrPSeOTg
假期完結後,芙兒重投工作。警局來了一個新丁,名叫阿夏,比芙兒年輕數載。他長有一張孩子臉,胖胖白白,水靈大眼,像小荷。芙兒的目光離不開阿夏,主動接近他、勾搭他。二人由相識至同睡一床,僅是三天內的事。441Please respect copyright.PENANAFiaexsVBwM
441Please respect copyright.PENANACdFcHDx3Ef
阿夏不解。441Please respect copyright.PENANAxf2NRrm4PG
441Please respect copyright.PENANAL1dzQKIs3I
「你不似是水性楊花的女人。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAkDzJOnnXLp
441Please respect copyright.PENANAYnnpjvar98
「你不似是諸事八卦的男人。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAEVkBxBEBXW
441Please respect copyright.PENANA6zbnKcLJKi
阿夏開始追求芙兒。芙兒不接受,卻偶爾與他同睡。為何不愛他卻會與他睡?是發洩,是鬱悶,或是對往事的情感投射?芙兒解釋不了,亦不想解釋——找到解釋之時,另一個問題就會隨即出現。441Please respect copyright.PENANArKrC51reIC
441Please respect copyright.PENANAawJTbyCmK9
繼續同睡,繼續被追求,繼續找人找救贖。生活不過如此,平平凡凡,無無謂謂。441Please respect copyright.PENANAisMh92ACel
441Please respect copyright.PENANA26x0pbJGrI
數年後的某天,芙兒收到來自兒時鄰居的一通電話。對方說芙爸病重,行將就木,希望她回鄉探望。441Please respect copyright.PENANAlutSdEQwAA
441Please respect copyright.PENANA6ef4zL1Cu7
「是他希望我回去,或是大家希望我回去探望他?」441Please respect copyright.PENANAy5CQH5kg2C
441Please respect copyright.PENANAELUwEfa3fz
「他堅持不要通知你,但大家還是決定要告訴你。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAxn5z0PACyJ
441Please respect copyright.PENANA4PDvoPvAAS
「我明白了。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAM3D6HTFteS
441Please respect copyright.PENANASX6lz7chWL
當晚,芙兒跟阿夏說要盡快回鄉宣佈婚訊、設喜宴。441Please respect copyright.PENANABfxuuHpBNy
441Please respect copyright.PENANAfIyoCtQZGq
「你跟誰結婚?」阿夏詫異。441Please respect copyright.PENANAA4pQvUT7S0
441Please respect copyright.PENANAKMnHhV348W
「你。」芙兒明白阿夏的不明白。441Please respect copyright.PENANAA0JfYKFVu2
441Please respect copyright.PENANA6aM5B3lSzl
顛著、簸著,好不容易來到村口。大城市發展一日千里,隱世小村亦逃不過時間巨輪的輾壓,已然根據政府的規劃建議打造成「山村旅遊區」。生來就是城市人的阿夏未曾到過農村,覺得這地方別具風味,但在村內待了十多年的芙兒卻嗤之以鼻:不也就是電視劇裡的假農村嗎?441Please respect copyright.PENANAEfCbbWpiHK
441Please respect copyright.PENANADp8SUEzTLQ
驀地,一個想法在芙兒腦海掠過。441Please respect copyright.PENANAydkozYSSmO
441Please respect copyright.PENANA4Yzc28UJQG
「阿夏。」芙兒拉拉阿夏的手袖:「我們先去蓮花池那邊看看吧。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAUn8cOsNKOx
441Please respect copyright.PENANAOJPvCgj9I1
不出芙兒所料,蓮花池已面目全非。池邊的泥地與草叢變成了磚路與涼亭,上了漆的鐵製圍欄整齊繞池而立,蓮花換了個品種,顏色更亮麗奪目,尺寸亦比以往的大上數倍。唯一不變的是頭頂上的烈日,仍然熾熱得惡毒。441Please respect copyright.PENANA9X1jTlEkpU
441Please respect copyright.PENANAmIiiWvzNFb
芙兒逕自繞著蓮花池逆時針方向拐圈踱步。踱踱踱,時間有可能隨著步伐逆轉,帶她回到二十年前的那個晚上嗎?若明知結果,她還是會不阻止爸爸賣掉小荷嗎?441Please respect copyright.PENANAwQQODr4qr4
441Please respect copyright.PENANAEhUhP4aKTX
老家陋宅裡,趁著阿夏上廁所的空檔,芙兒湊近芙爸耳邊直接問:「若明知結果,你還是會賣掉小荷嗎?」441Please respect copyright.PENANAWFKUEGBHnx
441Please respect copyright.PENANAUTo3R6NxGc
「會。」氣若柔絲的芙爸斬釘截鐵:「因為我是當爸的。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAB1FoH3YYc5
441Please respect copyright.PENANAEq5icAL143
「若沒有遇上小荷,你會賣掉我嗎?」441Please respect copyright.PENANAbrhjwkvAvU
441Please respect copyright.PENANAx7Ei12AiSS
「會。因為你們兄妹倆都會活著。活著才會有希望。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAMPtyVpDVx8
441Please respect copyright.PENANA3n2SDOZPOL
芙兒大受刺激,轉身奪門而出。441Please respect copyright.PENANApUI2slDXGb
441Please respect copyright.PENANARbdL63C64y
夏夜有月,月下有蟬,蟬聲擾人又煩人。路上行人疏落,卻異裝同臉,小荷的臉。路中倏忽生出白蓮朵朵,蓮上皆有小彩鞋一隻。芙兒知道自己瘋了,眼前盡是幻覺。理智脫軌,她不再恐懼,像個十歲的少女那樣跳脫輕盈,一步踏一蓮,來到池邊。441Please respect copyright.PENANAySdS3qgUrC
441Please respect copyright.PENANA6vA3W71Dcl
池邊有人,像小荷,像芙爸,像人口販子,像阿夏。她握著一隻彩色小鞋,木無表情直盯池中那朵大蓮花。芙兒走近女子,女子報以微笑,遞上手中小鞋。441Please respect copyright.PENANA1EhIoyldUz
441Please respect copyright.PENANAOeRqi5ppdI
芙兒接過它,模仿爸爸當晚的姿勢,以完美的拋物線弧度拋出小鞋。小鞋不偏不倚剛好落在池中央的蓮花上,有如二十年前的那夜。純白蓮花被夜色沾污成帶有瘀青的淡灰色,悉才看來色彩繽紛的小鞋子亦被迫融入夜色,成了一個若隱若現的小黑點。441Please respect copyright.PENANAzs4yOcAn2l
441Please respect copyright.PENANASGKgTr2n4H
女人哈哈大笑起來,笑聲豁然開朗。芙兒腳下的白蓮和小鞋驀地消失隱去,唯獨女子依然完好站在面前。笑過以後,女子轉身離開,身影沒入林間不復見。441Please respect copyright.PENANA3hWcVnNQD8
441Please respect copyright.PENANAmYeShgc9uL
芙兒惘然——她不肯定對方是幻覺或是確切存在的真人。441Please respect copyright.PENANACODk5X8unZ
441Please respect copyright.PENANAFffkJrw6DF
數日後,芙爸與世長辭。441Please respect copyright.PENANAqS72m61HH6
441Please respect copyright.PENANAEYb4DhFnqM
「既然不需要沖喜,你還會跟我結婚嗎?」441Please respect copyright.PENANA5A2FfQkGNI
441Please respect copyright.PENANA4gYoGyhNtp
「你想跟我結婚嗎?」441Please respect copyright.PENANAgXqGrkWRem
441Please respect copyright.PENANA8j1va0pm75
「想。我愛你。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAAcnBOXEOG4
441Please respect copyright.PENANAsvko9rX9NX
「那就繼續吧。」441Please respect copyright.PENANAGhKtD0nxmx
441Please respect copyright.PENANAMC7pJMa5Ge
喜慶夜,大排筵席。此人是小荷,那人是小荷,新郎是小荷,老爺是小荷,奶奶是小荷,滿堂皆是小荷。芙兒帶醉喜極而泣,感激小荷前來祝福她。441Please respect copyright.PENANAZaFVwRPRQC
441Please respect copyright.PENANAhV1Uc6d93x
宴後,賓客散去。醉得幾近失去意識的芙兒被攙扶到新房去。滾燙的臉龐忽爾涼涼的。她知道有人為她用濕毛巾抹臉抹汗。441Please respect copyright.PENANA6B02tnpWGF
441Please respect copyright.PENANAk7QqV0C4PV
「謝謝你……小荷……」441Please respect copyright.PENANAYghswdoXrV
441Please respect copyright.PENANAWJRopodRDk
「不用客氣……」441Please respect copyright.PENANAKObOsCGzqz
441Please respect copyright.PENANA9pkMDknJv2
說著說著,阿夏哭了。晶瑩淚水沿著胖白的臉頰下滑,水靈大眼楚楚可憐。像小荷。