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我在書枱前呆了大半日。熱茶已涼，但我未嚐半口，心思都在眼前電腦屏幕上——剛輸入的文字不停被刪。字越少，心越亂，人越躁。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg5iaJsNzWd
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡApaQSZs4SB
不了。受不了。我離座往廚房換茶去。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm7YQXDk2bI
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCl0vzVUOZV
廳中老妻瞄我半眼，大概知道發生甚麼事，沒有作聲，繼續看電視。我對她的不表態不勝感激——她以最聰明的方法維護我的尊嚴。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq0xXJgJfcY
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNHUv2BT3uQ
滾水撞上茶葉，水仙香氣隨著冉升白煙溢散開去。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIoJkcYGYai
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡblIo2RjhMb
壓力似乎一併消散。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZcZMR1FoH2
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFrRjl4yubg
茶盡。我再續杯。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvX1tFa69rB
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0jSoWaD1XJ
添茶不是長遠之計——屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq8VWsCLQEa
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5OukOw1RtM
嘆一口氣，慨嘆自己太天真可愛。怎麼會相信自己有寫作天分，而且一信就是幾十年。幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我只得不停安慰自己說旁人不識貨。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA7StL5DhXE
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgEPLXcM8L
口不對心。心裡其實清楚自己料子如何。但我還是堅持寫下去。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfFNaZ9OUx
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0XmA8FQnYI
是習慣、面子、尊嚴緣故，更是不想承認自己做了一個長達幾十年的白日夢。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvYpPyNrLQB
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVoR1VAAtKj
夢醒一場空。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH5Pqc6691g
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJRQl62P8b
我本平庸，無甚專長，唯獨寫作能力相對身邊友儕略高丁點。丁點而已，卻足以讓我樂透幾十年。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNU3LGH7dh
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHv0KiiG0s4
工作不順利時，我會告訴自己——我的專長不在工作上，所以被罵亦是無可厚非；人際關係不如意時，我會告訴自己——如果世人只能用文字溝通，我該是表達能力最好的人；走倒運時，我會告訴自己——我正在為快要誕生的偉大作品累積靈感……380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRkdcygJcIr
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZz9OpZTCks
一切都是有意義的。如果我真有寫作天分的話。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmeFLz6uz4w
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUmaHpt6BvK
捧著熱茶回到座位。身在心在能力不在。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPL0CLcGWgj
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD651X4znrj
在刺眼的屏幕白頁前，我又嘆一口氣。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxrZclOY4zL
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpbC3W2ZBNp
我不曾長大，仍是幾十年前那個我，沉浸在中文老師讚賞的我。同學們紛表羨慕我的寫作天份，請教我如何想出精彩故事、練出動人文筆。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6TwOYKYM67
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwqoMPcN0F
我沾沾自喜。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS4yr4SSgBp
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ41uSanApNF
細心回想，我當時已覺竅門不在天分，而是努力。努力鑽研文字的運用，努力細味名著佳作當中的韻味，努力思考故事情節起伏，努力觀察分析人世百態……名副其實的將勤補拙。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHLKwjBd4gp
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFY8fGlRA4x
但我沒有向同學們坦白。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡket5R2NH7o
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXbZsqEXP5g
因為我喜歡被讚賞的感覺。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlwW7HOoVn
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsM3eYoxMeS
努力，努力，努力。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zDLyHMtF1
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfvtAL2SOrG
我的寫作技巧與日俱增，亦在多個學屆寫作比賽中獲獎。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9eZKLzjwl8
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcOwADYKSlL
我以為自己將來鐵定能夠成為作家。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkzIiJcXK3L
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVsgNNrBbU
以為。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgdn5nbpenZ
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkuZZr7YgEq
告別校園後，我成為一個普通文職。普通收入，普通打扮，普通生活。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqdDmPjjJvE
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS24zCF1kqd
普通得輕易被取代。普通得難以承受。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIrBhW0VOHI
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm8hcT9vWZp
我不得不告訴自己我是多麼的有寫作天份！我是多麼的獨特！380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOCLjvm3Jtm
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6hroJAqlEw
某夜下班回家，我泡了一壺水仙，乘著茶香全情投入寫作世界。沒有外物打擾，我的世界只有我。一切如願。那麼順心，那麼安寧，那麼快樂。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG7fGfr9yhA
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw9H8HZ3q40
我的作品感動了我。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3i0ZQ8yXOp
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7icgTvr6gb
我希望藉此找到更多懂我的人。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc2XFxri7Gk
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7OK0imURk
幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我的世界與真實世界不斷相互碰撞。面對無止境的打擊，我不曾問自己為何堅持。因為一旦心生此等疑問，變相在內心種下「自我質疑」的根苗，一發不可收拾。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFYJ8yQRXlV
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAs506aZ8aM
無法接受自己幾十年堅持建基於一個沒可能實現的夢想。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyY8ie7Y9vb
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkeMban6acD
無法承受自己生來就是如此普通、平凡、平庸……380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWZvisZ3okE
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW0JzvhGbZ6
熱茶又涼了。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcCTafy1Oni
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbly9v5ErmB
屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJubV8BpU8H
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfJOYEZ2lqc
老妻繼續以不表態維護我的尊嚴。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEteCRSo1I3
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUQr8Btmjll
我的作品只感動了我。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr94cLuFCF9
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA3p50fqtey
因為我的感受只有我讀得懂。380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWf0ltvRyw7
