
仍然沒有人向我拜年。161Please respect copyright.PENANAzZI9bxOpjX
161Please respect copyright.PENANAgKTBRu9JV2
紅桃紫衣金龍,滿堂歡慶與我無關。我和唯一親人阿弟是家族中輩份及年齡最高的兩位。同樣白髮蒼蒼,老態龍鍾,待遇卻天淵之別。161Please respect copyright.PENANAxDDmwxPP8n
161Please respect copyright.PENANAS0voscjcWP
大家喜歡他、敬重他,圍著他團團轉,噓寒問暖,斟茶遞水。我只得穿上寒衣呆坐露台一隅,隔窗遠觀那份溫暖幸福。161Please respect copyright.PENANA9qsVKedsxd
161Please respect copyright.PENANA85IWZur92O
妒忌?羨慕?後悔?161Please respect copyright.PENANAaSCFhsWART
161Please respect copyright.PENANAWawwtjqpcV
幾十年來,我無數次問自己,若早知結果,會否重蹈覆轍?若然抉擇不同,如今會否活得更好?161Please respect copyright.PENANA3PQBSJ1fkU
161Please respect copyright.PENANADsZgqrZqPj
目光不期然瞟向客廳沙發。161Please respect copyright.PENANAsCHCtt1iwy
161Please respect copyright.PENANAzp7SqZpds2
看,與阿弟閒話家常的表妹,就是當年其中一個見死不救的傢伙。聽,表妹說救活阿弟的醫生即將百歲大壽,打算送他足金壽星公像作賀禮……161Please respect copyright.PENANARioZN2NH1c
161Please respect copyright.PENANAnpdlPGuEZe
嗖——新春寒風格外刺骨沁人。161Please respect copyright.PENANA6wSOsThfYh
161Please respect copyright.PENANAJ1Tmp3H0y5
那是一個純樸年代,大家毫不忸怩造作,全無顧慮表現出心中所思。阿弟命懸一線,醫生開天殺價,親友一毛不拔。我可以怎麼辦?我有選擇嗎?161Please respect copyright.PENANA4JS4R8TMjf
161Please respect copyright.PENANAlh4kp7hBa0
嗖——落地玻璃門被趟開,不知哪位親戚的小孩傻呼呼冒冷踏入露台,詫見有人安坐黑暗角落:「你也在捉迷藏?」161Please respect copyright.PENANAosZ7jxB25t
161Please respect copyright.PENANAiccBvXCQZ8
「沒有。」突然有後輩對我說話,我乍驚乍喜,略顯不知所措:「你知道我是誰?」161Please respect copyright.PENANA2VYsUHmeTz
161Please respect copyright.PENANA6SMhD16czZ
「遠房親戚長輩。」稚子聰敏,答案模稜兩可,卻也挑不出錯處。161Please respect copyright.PENANAp9whRPMif4
161Please respect copyright.PENANAbWavDsjlWE
「乖!」我珍愛輕拍他的小小頭頂,喜悅淚水差點兒奪眶湧出:「給你紅包!」161Please respect copyright.PENANAcHpuWwgjoX
161Please respect copyright.PENANA3s1KWKICsB
每年新春,我總會預備幾封紅包在口袋,為的就是不知何時出現的新舊交替。161Please respect copyright.PENANAjmvIUZCMLy
161Please respect copyright.PENANAaOCfJnOnVU
人難免一死,記憶和歷史無法完整傳承予後輩。知情人士相繼離世,加上他們向來忌諱提及我的過去與存在,終有一天,後輩們只把我視為「遠房親戚長輩」、一個普通不過的老者。161Please respect copyright.PENANAvymuw5guBk
161Please respect copyright.PENANA2sRg4a1b54
小孩收到紅包,興奮連講幾句祝賀說話,喜孜孜踏著小跳步回到室內。他的身影在拐角處消失尚沒一分鐘,表弟婦臉色玄青,直闖露台,不發一言,退還紅包。161Please respect copyright.PENANAkXQzGrnwcA
161Please respect copyright.PENANAP5lWlC7IwM
我沒有接過。她乾脆將紅包扔在地面,轉身俐落揚長而去。客廳人聲消失好幾秒,然後再次熱鬧起來。新年快樂、喜氣盈門、一團和氣……161Please respect copyright.PENANA3mKWuVUNi6
161Please respect copyright.PENANAdu7Ez4Z99t
我知道大家心知肚明露台發生甚麼尷尬事。我知道地上紅包已被風吹走。我知道今天遭遇是未來寫照:我將會孤獨終老。161Please respect copyright.PENANAE9UMrageSf
161Please respect copyright.PENANAsdsEIsTaPb
嗖——落地玻璃門被趟開,某青壯後輩從客廳搬來一張有背竹椅,置於我身邊,然後阿弟在旁人攙扶下安坐。161Please respect copyright.PENANAUXsK63Qg5b
161Please respect copyright.PENANANZArHJI411
關門關窗,與世隔絕。只有我兄弟倆的世界。161Please respect copyright.PENANAFEiR3j1uaa
161Please respect copyright.PENANA7B9TNgJVBc
「小心著涼。」我倆同時開口。161Please respect copyright.PENANAmMpoZvuYf6
161Please respect copyright.PENANASe7rGizROi
相視苦笑。161Please respect copyright.PENANA9G9Jop6nwP
161Please respect copyright.PENANAjTQ6HnpNA0
「今天氣溫與那個冬夜差不多。」阿弟輕嗟。161Please respect copyright.PENANAPOjio1E9t8
161Please respect copyright.PENANAR8r0bATdCJ
「還可以。」我那時候完全不覺冷。短時間內在村裡來回跑動十幾圈。求醫生,求親友,求路人。最後只得取刀架著醫生喉嚨……161Please respect copyright.PENANA0BQ3zuoJbL
161Please respect copyright.PENANAjI5DIec4GS
「你不打算到客廳坐坐?」阿弟每年都會如此問我。161Please respect copyright.PENANAUvExLVO4cq
161Please respect copyright.PENANAfBqUqyEVC5
我猶豫。明明渴望融入家庭,為何我竟在阿弟主動伸出援手時卻步?161Please respect copyright.PENANAp7Zrugeqhq
161Please respect copyright.PENANAwq8JfQyO5r
「哥,不用怕,大家會給我面子。」阿弟暖笑。161Please respect copyright.PENANAX4POarMU7l
161Please respect copyright.PENANAV4l3nM77Zi
阿弟說得沒錯,面子的確重要。無人想跟犯罪者扯上關係,懶理我有何不幸遭遇。難得阿弟多年花盡心血建立大善人形象,重新得到大家接納,我又豈可破壞他得來不易的一切?161Please respect copyright.PENANAeWiLCEBr7P
161Please respect copyright.PENANAjPKkzGB35v
只願他新年快樂。161Please respect copyright.PENANAvMknErJOha
161Please respect copyright.PENANA5o2A4250NK
「不了。」我搖首婉拒。161Please respect copyright.PENANAPaIZZ5CrRx
161Please respect copyright.PENANAdG05Rb1R3t
幾句寒暄後,阿弟在親友催促下回去室內。161Please respect copyright.PENANATbdmuufIol
161Please respect copyright.PENANAHV4SqkpIdT
關門關窗,與世隔絕。161Please respect copyright.PENANABHbudWqU0f
161Please respect copyright.PENANAD2urpHQEQc
我長嘆一聲,把口袋裡所有紅包扔掉。161Please respect copyright.PENANA9HEHhvjcRY
161Please respect copyright.PENANASfRxLPZg8L
它們隨風四散,不由自主地消失於這個冬夜。