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根據居民的指示，我沿著竹林小徑走了一整天，終於到達目的地：一間全竹結構的寺廟。它比我預想中更為破落，冷冷清清的。我抬頭望向高高懸掛在山門的匾額，寫著「竹寺」。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCsnQCTPPZy
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOOaa1IUXyE
蠻有意思的名字。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4A9akScC9i
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUzvnQ3H83W
當我正要邁步內進時，一個打扮樸素的瘦削大叔剛好開門踏出。四目交投，雙方都愣住了幾秒。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBBkxtavpez
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ53D7RlqiVI
「歡迎內進。」沒等我回答，大叔已轉身為我引路。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYMuY8emar
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJKN4DJZHbb
眼見天色漸暗，我不再磨蹭，看能否找到綫索，省卻逗留此地的時間：「不好意思喔，大叔！請問黃XX女士住在這裡嗎？」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIDwgtDpEQl
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVpnE2MoYfi
大叔的腳步突兀地戛然而止。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhnYiQv9Hoo
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4V6yZFkJVP
是我的提問過於唐突嗎？478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJH69Z10Eb4
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp23JjRWYPF
大叔回頭仔細打量我，神色疑惑，似乎在猜測我和黃女士的關係。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Z7nX4cN9u
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Gn9BSJW3T
「有人託我將信件親手轉交予黃女士。」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ35Qic4VcgI
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZh4L5C007
「黃女士已離開這裡好一段時間，不知何時會回來……甚或是不知會否回來。」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4hyandiYIE
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxk0QU0Sb3G
「她有透露去處嗎？」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKkzv9LYF48
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡliF7neWYPv
「沒有……我帶你去她昔日的房間試找綫索。」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bdmrm2Sql
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQh2mgdldze
大叔再次邁步，步履沒有之前的輕，重若銀鉛。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiyLOlgYQ23
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI0FRLpY0qs
陰冷的空氣，空洞的房間，慘白的牆身，最基本的傢俬和雜物。沒有生活的氣息。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpnY9d8u5SP
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOH52JBMNJq
「剛才在門外碰見你，也還真令我驚訝。」大叔沒有進入房間，逕自在門外呢呢喃喃。「竹寺曾香火鼎盛。後來毗鄰的兩個小鎮分別新建更大更金碧輝煌的寺廟，無意間將信眾分流開去，到來竹寺掛單的僧侶亦逐漸減少，住持最終徇眾要求到另一寺廟主持大局。他指派我長駐於此，打掃清潔，說要方便途經的旅客。我一直覺得他想多了，豈料今天就遇見你。」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV04DEg3ZFI
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kF49oQ85W
「可能佛祖不想我白走一趟。」我話中有話，提醒侍奉佛祖的大叔不要忘記佛祖的存在，萬萬不能撒謊。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3e9Ds4JubF
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS4eQPmIRho
「我可以明天帶你見住持。他有掛單紀錄，可能有黃女士的聯絡資料。」大叔也不是省油的燈，簡單幾句就將我逼至沒有退路的位置：「但我希望你能先對我坦白事情的前因後果。住持是個大忙人。我可不希望為他增添不必要的麻煩。」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYgQ6rXjtWK
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxseUwlmrWp
我只得坦白交代。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXlqDkugf0e
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqUDM5bJzpX
我的妻子過身了。臨終前，她希望我能預留一年時間為她完成唯一的遺願：親手將遺書交予離家出走多年的生母——黃女士。事隔多年，黃女士曾在多個地方落腳。我每次根據綫索趕至時，她早已遷居。輾轉間，我追尋至竹寺……478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU9sCVFKyGn
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcZEpzX27Z
「距離一年限期，還剩多少日子？」大叔生起關切之情。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW6GCONM9Im
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz2jk3Dk0yz
「三日。竹寺很可能是我的最後機會。」我加倍留意他的神色舉止。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdHh1A8qPVu
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi0Fs16VCAH
「不考慮延長？」大叔表現出來的的關切絕對超過一個陌生人該有的限度。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdMKJ7HzAeC
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzvZbA5k6l7
「妻子信緣份。她認為努力過後仍沒能找到，證明彼此有緣無份，毋須強求。她還叮囑我要燒毀遺書。」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fYjacUqMU
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi0GrHt0VIY
大叔若有所思後，講出驚人的一句：「若果一年期限屆滿時仍找不到黃女士，介意給我看看遺書嗎？」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9cDaZ9AU0
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIiU0fgK5vF
「極度介意！」我心裡認定大叔有事隱瞞。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8ASElIO17
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOfGBAUB7kw
尷尬氣氛令大叔不再多話。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzgG45Icz2x
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPlfOYaQ8SJ
晚餐後，大叔在其他地方忙著，我則留在房間對著愛妻的照片痛哭一場。哭過以後，壓力得以紓緩，但心頭卻未能添加半分澄明，混沌混濁。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIACUI2plOd
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoFYpe5hoU0
我離房在寺內溜達散心。逛著逛著，忽爾看見大叔彎腰對著花園中的小樹喁喁細語，臉上盡是蜜甜。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqXVhjcPyUG
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ25WHTgHYD6
我上前跟大叔打招呼。他微笑回應，和顏悅色，渾身散發著慈祥氣息，沒有白天時的隔膜。我嘗試放下戒心，開心見誠與他聊天。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjH46wV5A3B
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbRCMALthJO
不知怎地，聊著聊著，話題竟牽到大叔的心事去。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNkW3YFaRHI
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOiioikGFPs
「貪，使人執著於一切順情之境。嗔，使人執著於一切違情之境。痴，使人不明白真理，致使生起貪嗔。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Gx2dMIFXB
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXzNArWptJv
我痴愚半生，痛苦不已。到此地求法，希望住持指點迷津。但他認為我凡心未盡，要我留在這裡靜思。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCRXv56I8gH
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwzIxuwvIyl
我在竹寺侍奉多年，住持依然不為所動。我以為他在敷衍我。今天遇到你，我才明白住持所言非虛：任何無關的人事物都可輕易勾起我對逝去伴侶的思念。」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUdcox5Is5P
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2YS4sJ5Z0
我終於明白初時大叔何以對我不太友善。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ45n1wgdX6c
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr5wv80ThS3
將心比心。喪妻之後，任何人事物均能勾起我和對太太的思念。我曾抱怨上天幸災樂禍，何解不讓我安靜避世。我已盡力放下身邊一切，辭掉工作，不聯絡親友，遷出愛巢，但偏偏愛妻的遺願就是要我去彌補她的畢生遺憾！我沒有一刻能放下她，因為我的分分秒秒就是為她而過。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6W3c2y82f
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwKVORQA2t3
那種痛苦實非筆墨所能形容。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYJ0FYP2yKf
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXB3u4K6ozG
「你的妻子真聰明，給你的痛苦設下一年期限。只要你在這一年裡拼命為她圓願，往後也就了無遺憾或悔疚。我可沒那麼幸運，不知要拖著這副臭皮囊乾等到哪年哪月哪日……」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccVWdqUnNU
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡslRKTaFCxf
說罷，他跟我和小樹說晚安，然後揚長而去。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡexdJ0chTNi
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZrRN4407tm
翌日，我翻遍整間竹寺亦找不到大叔，只在他的房間找到他留給我的手繪地圖。我跟著地圖的指示走了大半天，來到住持現處的寺廟。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8BzlOJcj1h
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfq7W5bOcew
住持聽罷我的經歷後，不禁黯然慨嘆：「黃女士始終凡心未盡……」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh0QFamoRoq
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhYFrkPKndn
黃女士當年拋夫棄女，與情夫私奔。豈料甜蜜日子不長久，情夫患急病逝世。黃女士大受打擊，認為是自己作孽甚深，連累情夫。她來到竹寺，望住持能指點迷津。住持認為她深陷激動情緒當中，容易作出錯誤選擇，逐要她在竹寺靜思己過。可惜她半夜逃離。當黃女士重臨竹寺時，她已花光積蓄在黑市做手術整容及變性，以情夫的外表現身……478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVN43yfJmRM
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5TLHxce1QX
「大叔就是黃女士？」我不禁驚呼。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdoKZ7tBNsz
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdR9AM2IyI1
震驚之情瞬間即逝，取而代之的是說不出的矛盾。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fT6FQJAas
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2GrBpI23Q
這個人，我恨不來，亦原諒不了。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRzj2rm80z1
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ZBQmf95Xe
翌日，我和住持往竹寺走一趟。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡURuXLJzDEt
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn3LZ1Vs7IJ
寺前，我倆不約而同抬頭望向匾額。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWORxLwVgV1
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3pkfLX9nup
「你知道『竹寺』何以得名嗎？」住持問。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeaESYwInmj
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡri7MrscLlc
「等？」我的猜想有如初來之時。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyr4YaYcrLG
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZouQcUqS3
「這名字只不過是客觀描述寺廟本身。」住持揚手指向全竹結構的寺廟：「大家實在想多了，對自己的想像投放情感，賦予它過多的意義，致使看不見眼前真象。」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDM2Rq9HpkK
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFNmdDxZR7h
我驀地憶起大叔前夜的說話。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf9pfjS2ste
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFdVsYTgOz6
住持直接走往花園。不出他所料，小樹已被連根拔起，樹下土地被挖出一個大坑，足以容納一個成人。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt2R6MvxtvO
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynKb3CfLA6
我心頭一涼，頓時明白那是甚麼一回事：多年以來，情夫的屍首一直埋在這裡。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPZbOy0BSlg
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN59p9VJfQP
我鼻頭一酸，淚如雨下。478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCdPgRUs87S
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4msV93EBmM
「『強逼自己放下執著』也是一種執著。」478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE88LH7YTPm
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWFTLWYdGKn
住持淡然望天，開始為一切生者亡者誦經。
