天亮,上班。802Please respect copyright.PENANAYPpp81g7f2
802Please respect copyright.PENANAv5QFLaq2mY
擠進人山人海的車廂,心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物,我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟,好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。802Please respect copyright.PENANAFEKIC5GBZY
802Please respect copyright.PENANAY9FD10xDBr
車廂一如往常,平穩中帶輕微搖晃,教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲,繼續進食,令人側目。802Please respect copyright.PENANANUesrLXjHs
802Please respect copyright.PENANAuDyvWXKE5j
食物的細碎,像沙子一樣,在人們毫不注意的情況下,悄然掉在地上,再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站,人們再肆意加以踐踏,令碎粉再度粉碎。802Please respect copyright.PENANAOkmsy2HQhp
802Please respect copyright.PENANABBgVfBuKVC
到站了,我有意無意地繞過人羣,「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉,心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上,我回頭望進車廂,想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉,但列車經已開駛。802Please respect copyright.PENANARnqshJmrti
802Please respect copyright.PENANAcdPuENFDcS
看不見,罷。
天黑,下班。802Please respect copyright.PENANAAbg29RsfHH
802Please respect copyright.PENANAWWxFNUHhs8
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂,繼續講上司的壞話。802Please respect copyright.PENANAbxCrenXAwb
802Please respect copyright.PENANAYycIwcSlTP
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。802Please respect copyright.PENANAEDHNAerS7v
802Please respect copyright.PENANAX8oQBp5fb3
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不!有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰?我看不見……我不想看見……802Please respect copyright.PENANA49X5UJXCKt
802Please respect copyright.PENANAlZqgRh9MIM
「啪」的一聲,男同事一手拍在我的小腿上,那隻螞蟻——扁了。802Please respect copyright.PENANAPczPMqiq8U
802Please respect copyright.PENANAlF1apErErP
「沒事了!」他笑了笑,問我:「你很怕小昆蟲?」802Please respect copyright.PENANAI9AEiftPGZ
802Please respect copyright.PENANAI0eqZYcT8y
「不,只是怕蟻。」我感覺到,我的唇還在顫抖,但卻仍勉力一笑。
公司,午飯時間。802Please respect copyright.PENANAegGnQbGCWN
802Please respect copyright.PENANAnL1hnVE3B9
甲小姐正在上網看劇;乙先生在打盹;丙小姐外出吃飯去;丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒;戊小姐……802Please respect copyright.PENANAimsa5p42hN
802Please respect copyright.PENANAN9r5RxlG1B
看著同事們的百態,我突然覺得自己和他們一樣,都是很渺小的生命體,小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事,尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌,不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎?那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別?802Please respect copyright.PENANAIpL2c1V2ao
802Please respect copyright.PENANAMwd3MENWrs
驀地,我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過,卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上,讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失,我感到自己也消失了似的。
其實,真正的我只是一隻螞蟻,不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己變成人類,過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活,是有目的的付出,有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑,多奢侈!無他,這就是意義。802Please respect copyright.PENANAUjTI1NN2Uw
802Please respect copyright.PENANAZAFFWMRSIc
還是……802Please respect copyright.PENANAeg07Kq5gUp
802Please respect copyright.PENANAGGqtFapjSc
其實,真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己是一隻蟻,過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味,只懂一味尋找食物。無他,這就是生存!
公司,工作。802Please respect copyright.PENANAZKnxqf49nT
802Please respect copyright.PENANAeqXN07RVk2
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。802Please respect copyright.PENANAEEPZEGAN8f
802Please respect copyright.PENANA3DgcpoLpi0
大家心知犯錯的不是我,奈何人是怕事的,只好把我推上斷頭台。事後,一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。802Please respect copyright.PENANAySPxa4Og0V
802Please respect copyright.PENANABD6cr7WedS
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。802Please respect copyright.PENANA8fxLaLsbbV
802Please respect copyright.PENANAvksA2GxxdM
剛巧,一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。802Please respect copyright.PENANArs3eMKieUd
802Please respect copyright.PENANAA0udq75k6n
快意,笑了。
酒吧,喝酒。802Please respect copyright.PENANAD6HQcMuitS
802Please respect copyright.PENANATPuHyRXTWA
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎?為何現在也怕酒起來?」男同事笑問。802Please respect copyright.PENANAmlU1c3at6T
802Please respect copyright.PENANAIWDxc7oIGO
「其實,我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。802Please respect copyright.PENANAJqBbBd24Rb
802Please respect copyright.PENANA7tLByp7qCV
「還是……你根本不會喝酒?」他哈哈大笑。802Please respect copyright.PENANA5rU5DFogzl
802Please respect copyright.PENANAp593MMAmBD
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲,我突然變得不大抗拒,乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。802Please respect copyright.PENANA0LhJRzxs3B
802Please respect copyright.PENANAMsnUXG3ohr
醉倒。802Please respect copyright.PENANAVoLyzMMuKK
802Please respect copyright.PENANA2alMBakJx2
迷糊間,我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體,不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲,想要到它的洞穴去……802Please respect copyright.PENANAQ1uSwsmWKa
802Please respect copyright.PENANAYjZFqnYYgl
「上天取走你的一扇門,定會留給你一扇窗。」802Please respect copyright.PENANAsjS72UxSK7
802Please respect copyright.PENANAWG89zKaplr
今趟,上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。
假期,醫院。802Please respect copyright.PENANAyGXYnJOao5
802Please respect copyright.PENANAYmf2XHtitb
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病,還未明確,因為報告要待下星期才會完成。802Please respect copyright.PENANAQhdhrPSl4K
802Please respect copyright.PENANAOV5d8Al1de
看見媽的時候,家中各人都是淚眼漣漣,很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。802Please respect copyright.PENANAWfXl4vLizX
802Please respect copyright.PENANAy8oO73MSWZ
「我覺得……」近幾天,媽的話都變得斷斷續續:「自己……」802Please respect copyright.PENANAGaB4dpdt3S
802Please respect copyright.PENANAxSLT4opuIw
大家都屏息靜氣,深怕這是她的最後一句話。802Please respect copyright.PENANAgzwR3xAR6z
802Please respect copyright.PENANAGUi1HtrjjA
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音,輕如柔絲,但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。802Please respect copyright.PENANApIi1RMeLad
802Please respect copyright.PENANA1SNKRtWVio
死寂。802Please respect copyright.PENANAjhDk3lTtSD
802Please respect copyright.PENANAHG6ES62Skx
出乎我意料,這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話,不論是肉體還是心靈上。
回家,晚飯。802Please respect copyright.PENANAtVBIsK7eHW
802Please respect copyright.PENANAzPzKoXD72m
一枱六椅,異常的沉默。電視的聲浪,掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意,繼續吃。802Please respect copyright.PENANAl1xH4g8HMr
802Please respect copyright.PENANASljODBjjdE
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子:「不如外出吃飯。」802Please respect copyright.PENANA9RKNhlEYGW
802Please respect copyright.PENANAOdlK9q6FHo
妹放下筷子衝進房內,甩門;姨低下頭來,但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見;婆呆了,眼眶紅潤;我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。802Please respect copyright.PENANADgQnARLBvw
802Please respect copyright.PENANAK86XAtdA7T
我心想:世界末日來臨後,地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻?
每次望著媽,心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣,彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。802Please respect copyright.PENANAItoCqqo48F
802Please respect copyright.PENANAoADOhy4SWH
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑!就是因為她是一隻螞蟻,所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭,去減輕她的負擔。802Please respect copyright.PENANAvTMJbZDbuy
802Please respect copyright.PENANA42lGprsQcz
久而久之,我每次一見到她,便會掉頭走。802Please respect copyright.PENANAMEsiUgRfsT
802Please respect copyright.PENANArwd48Phndv
但我知道,我永沒能走遠。
男友家,床上。802Please respect copyright.PENANAHO47aGduR7
802Please respect copyright.PENANABDWRrLPtBy
前奏後,男友進入極度興奮狀態,沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時,我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。802Please respect copyright.PENANAFLH0HEB7rz
802Please respect copyright.PENANAcyYlvUXWKK
産房內有一張床,床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了,是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示,她要生産了。不消一會,整張床上都是幼蟻,恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。802Please respect copyright.PENANA0DnjzC9jjT
802Please respect copyright.PENANAEdZTXLu4OJ
我驚恐萬分之際,耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音:「他朝君體也相同!」802Please respect copyright.PENANAxrI6AA6G8A
802Please respect copyright.PENANAcMxXrnk5Uf
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮,於是更用力……
舊生聚會,內地某酒家。802Please respect copyright.PENANAo83wEcOSdT
802Please respect copyright.PENANAfgZmt3e75P
說也奇怪,舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意,說會給我們驚喜。802Please respect copyright.PENANAtzJuDChugP
802Please respect copyright.PENANApCGWEFwStZ
「蟻宴?」我呆了,但逃不了。802Please respect copyright.PENANAid6TKx22Np
802Please respect copyright.PENANAP49KdmNAiM
「你有收看《天與地》嗎?」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。802Please respect copyright.PENANAxXELpRUtg0
802Please respect copyright.PENANARhloHt4DWm
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼!」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。802Please respect copyright.PENANA88L8BP33CJ
802Please respect copyright.PENANAv2AAct9ucm
「結局何如?」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。802Please respect copyright.PENANAFnmXghXMxG
802Please respect copyright.PENANAr0gwWuroKX
「沒好下場!」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。802Please respect copyright.PENANAWf4FXn2fCP
802Please respect copyright.PENANASvyrbZstKV
「對!沒好下場!」我在心裡重覆著,衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。
男友有很多恐怖的寵物:蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時,他都會放一些寵物在床邊,以增加他的性趣。802Please respect copyright.PENANAUHW2ds4bLW
802Please respect copyright.PENANAuSTNsonCBU
今趟,床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後,我不經意的問道:「你的寵物呢?」802Please respect copyright.PENANAoAGQpPBINB
802Please respect copyright.PENANAE5Ranhlp8B
「在你體內。」802Please respect copyright.PENANAT6pcbGC3m4
802Please respect copyright.PENANAtCghn13Hcn
「甚麼?」802Please respect copyright.PENANAtmyvDIo1GM
802Please respect copyright.PENANAoytHP4p3WL
「蟻。」
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。802Please respect copyright.PENANAafJb2fp8YG
802Please respect copyright.PENANAf7TyPfhGis
它平常會做甚麼?做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯,它會做的事真的很多,但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活!它最好立刻消失!802Please respect copyright.PENANABL0rlV8lEq
802Please respect copyright.PENANAcrL6lCj9I6
結果,我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。
靈堂上,我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。802Please respect copyright.PENANAtzBOa9vZrT
802Please respect copyright.PENANAmIru8B5PGO
「她真的死了嗎?」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊,但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。802Please respect copyright.PENANAjI5g3x1g92
802Please respect copyright.PENANA05i85swztr
「誰?」另一聲音反問。802Please respect copyright.PENANAlmAR46PYm6
802Please respect copyright.PENANA3qYcZxJYuZ
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道:「她……」802Please respect copyright.PENANASB5tMNcd1s
802Please respect copyright.PENANAvghYut7bSk
靜。802Please respect copyright.PENANAaaBAAWbccc
802Please respect copyright.PENANAquBRReC0pd
我回過神來,低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。
我:「我的耳朵有毛病嗎?為何會聽到螞蟻講話?」802Please respect copyright.PENANAryOFo4oher
802Please respect copyright.PENANAn1OuSWyKcq
醫:「不。是你的壓力過大,導致有幻聽。」802Please respect copyright.PENANAF531xIggZ8
802Please respect copyright.PENANAodQGRwpKgF
我:「我有精神病?」802Please respect copyright.PENANAtBOc3LzSch
802Please respect copyright.PENANArio4WbGqHK
醫:「是情緒病。」802Please respect copyright.PENANAlQ0pzJ374e
802Please respect copyright.PENANAFsM9OhbALO
我:「怎麼辦?」802Please respect copyright.PENANAkndiyiOHUM
802Please respect copyright.PENANAf9pL3McNBT
醫:「我會處方一些藥物,你要按時服用;另外,你也要多休息……」802Please respect copyright.PENANAS4ylmZHGDJ
802Please respect copyright.PENANAkifc02rBdJ
我:「謝謝醫生。」802Please respect copyright.PENANAd4k7I0lNwv
802Please respect copyright.PENANAyIKCiVSvkS
醫:「不用謝。」802Please respect copyright.PENANAMeGstV0KhM
802Please respect copyright.PENANAZreK36lh5h
離開診所時,我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。802Please respect copyright.PENANAohDucqgNJY
802Please respect copyright.PENANAoTBKjuE6zS
不,我走近細看,是「虫馬虫義」專科。
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻?802Please respect copyright.PENANAgijefq2ADS
802Please respect copyright.PENANAujpSfh84T7
醫生替我作身體檢查,一切正常;802Please respect copyright.PENANAxENE9v1C7K
802Please respect copyright.PENANAFLOFby9oPj
男友向我解釋,螞蟻之說,純粹幽默;802Please respect copyright.PENANA5JSOTn8yq7
802Please respect copyright.PENANA4mI9yJMmMR
同事都勸我休息,減少工作量;802Please respect copyright.PENANAmGOXDyTYpN
802Please respect copyright.PENANAp1gx6FGtg2
……802Please respect copyright.PENANABmdcWVdLYc
802Please respect copyright.PENANA7eE61fhBqB
「真的有蟻在我體內!」我尖叫,奪門而出,從天台一躍而下,肝腦塗地。802Please respect copyright.PENANAJO5C07GdUB
802Please respect copyright.PENANAA8NBzYzCWq
臨死前,我看見那東西了——不是蟻,是……