Zadia
Oh what y'all thought this was all about Nubia. You guys are funny. This isn't all about her and her struggle of what she went through. This is about all three of us. Nubia just got a little carried away and didn't want to share the spotlight. Stingy ass. As the youngest has told you we all went through our things while Nubia was gone yes I am the oldest but Nubia as the middle was the backbone of our little Trio sister group. Without Nubia, Zakia turn to me for help support and guidance. When she first came to me about have Seth rejected her I couldn't help her I feel so disappointed in myself she wanted someone to comfort and hug her and I was too rigid. Nubia she's good with all of that stuff but as time went on and the racial slurs corrupted Nubia she too became rigid stern and harsh.
When Nubia left we all spiraled out of control in our own way. Zakia shutdown and immersed herself into her art. She often locked herself in her room and our parents would have to go up to her room to give her dinner and lunch.
Myself, I'm not really sure how I spiraled out of control I know I hung out with the wrong crowd and then some things I'm not proud of. And at one point my parents threatened to take me to where Nubia was if I didn't calm down or do what they said. I didn't want to go so I did calm down a little bit but it was all a facade I just didn't want them to see what I was doing. But other than that I kept my grades up and try my best to pull away from the bad influence of friends that I had. It's easier said than done.
Where my parents found out what I was up to they sent me to a juvenile detention center for like a month. I'll tell you that set me straight period when I got back to school I didn't hang out with the wrong crowd and I had my sights set on being either a cheerleader a basketball player or a track runner. I have always been in the sports so I figured that I would make newer and better friends if I was in sports or something that was a good influence.
We didn't really visit Nubia much and by we I mean my sister and I. I guess we didn't want to face the reality that she was where she was and we were where we were. But when we did see her we never told her about any of the problems we were going through. I didn't tell her how I spent a month in juvenile detention center and zakiya just didn't say much at all about how she was feeling.
To be honest I don't think Nubia really thought out how her going to rehab would have affected us as sisters period I do admit that music I have been pulling away from Nubia period we're not exactly sure why but we have been period because before Nubia started fighting before any of this started happening we were very close. As close as sisters could be. They was like we had our own little Inner Circle and we only let a few people in but come to find out those few people weren't who they said they were. And we let them destroy our bond. But then now that I really think of it was Arbonne really that strong in the first place?
I am going to let you guys in on a little secret. Me and Jafaris...I did have a thing for him and I didn't really treat him right. I thought he....I don't know. He had so much money and it wasn't like our family didn't have money but the fact that such a young boy had it. It was amazing to me. So yeah I got caught up with what he could buy for me and do for me. I didn't really love him or even like him...ok...but I did kind of like him because if I didn't I wouldn't be so fucking jealous of Nubia being with him. Plus, she didn't know that I was with him in the first place. There is a lot Nubia doens't know...and I know that I will have to tell her eventually. Eventually....
ns 15.158.61.20da2
