Matty's POV
Cali at night is far cooler than cali by day, I pull my leather jacket around me and stride down the road. Walking past my 4x4 and chastising myself for caving into alcohol, once again. Leaving a party alone, no girls in tow, is new to me. How I've changed I laugh to myself. My mind tells me this is growth. I'm going to be a better man, she will do that for me.
Taylor has been in our lives for less than a week and has already managed to cause a stir. The girls are jealous of her and the guys want her. Betting against Ross, although it was wrong on so many levels, it was necessary to show him that I’m very much in the picture. Just like always alcohol is not my best friend and it allows me to let things go too far.
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Diverting my mind away from the betting conversation and the inevitable consequences of that I check my phone to find no new messages. This is how all of those girls in my past felt when I didn't message them back. Damn, what an ass.
Midnight, I glance at the time walking down the sidewalk with a slight stumble in my stride due to the alcohol. I have got to stop drinking, Jay used to tell me that it’s all about the pace of your drinking. You keep yourself in better control when you pace yourself rather than downing the brandy. We spent many evenings in his apartment pacing ourselves through bottles of brandy, and he always maintained his sobriety for far longer than myself, never did he stumble down the street like I am at this very moment.
Jay Gilbert Scott would conquest a girl like Taylor in a matter of moments. She is slightly more challenging than the girls that I am used to, but he would, with his charm and his tenacity take her over. Imagining him now in Australia most likely surfing the tallest wave on a private beach I wonder why he went back to Jen as a bed partner. His style is usually petite brunettes, or girls who are more likely to cave into his demands rather than feisty tall girls that wear too much makeup.
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Playing with my phone and deliberating, I start to wonder why she messaged Ross and not me. That's what it boils down to in my mind. Him or me. What has he got? What has he done that I haven't? I suppose he has the advantage of being a romantic sap, what with all of his pride and prejudice quotes and his blonde mop of hair. He looks like a romance cover model; kind eyes and a muscular body. It’s unlike me to be jealous of Ross, usually the girl just picks me. Or she picks Jay and I back down. There’s little to no point playing with Jay when he can just whisk her away to a private island and have his way. It’s imperative that I sort all of this out before he returns from his travels, I must secure my place in her life. In my alcohol fuelled state I decide I should just ask her. Right? be direct. Before I can stop myself I'm dialling her number.
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It rings. And I begin to imagine the different outcomes of making this call. If she doesn't answer that will be pathetic. I listen to the dial tone willing her to answer even just so that I can hear her sweet voice. The dial tone continues and I start to lose hope; I will not be Tom and keep calling all night long or hang outside of her house.
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More of the dial tone and I begin to question whether this is what she does to guys. Gets them hooked and then just plays them off. Surely not? We had a genuine connection, didn't we? Just as I'm rambling to myself she answers. And I strike gold hearing her voice. It's far more gentle than any of the girls I've ever known.
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"Matty?" She sighs sleepily. I yearn to be there. She sounds so relaxed, I imagine her laying in the dark and I want to be laying there my arm hooked around her waist like I did this morning on my sofa.
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"Hey, did I wake you? I'm sorry, I ugh..." I begin, feigning consideration for calling so late.
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"I was actually waiting for you to call but I kind of fell asleep" she says softly, chucking.
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"I'm sorry I kept you waiting" I smile down the phone, looking like a clown walking in the dark with a grin plastered on my face.
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I can tell she's smiling back, she pauses. All of my aggravation has drained away. I don't even m remember why I was angry and anxious.
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"I just wanted to be straight with you, this is unlike me okay?" I begin, I sound like such a catch. More like a complete head case. What would Jay say, I ask myself. Be cool, lay it on the line and then wait for her reaction. I decide to go with that.
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"Uh oh that sounds ominous" she says softly. I'm saying it all wrong as usual. I'm not good with words like Ross the poet, literature major.
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"No, not uh oh. I wanted to say that I like you, that doesn't even cut it really. I've just spent over five hours thinking about just you. And what to do about you. Which I don't ever do. I usually think about me and just what I want" I ramble on and she's still listening to my dribble.
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"Man this is coming out wrong" I laugh and she giggles. I want to make her giggle all of the time.
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"Are you just a little bit drunk" she teases me.
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"Maybe but no more than usual" I tell her.
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"I'm not doing this because I am drunk okay." I tell her and she laughs. This is not going well. I need to take charge stop beating around the bush and tell her how I feel.
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"No I mean it I would like to see how things go between us. That's if you'd like that too?" I say, being direct. I'm approaching my door so I light up a cigarette to finish my call with before I go in.
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She's quiet. Surprised maybe? I wait patiently for her response checking my phone to see if the call is connected. Counting up to ten, don’t keep talking Matthew I tell myself, I do that a lot.
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"Honestly Taylor, I was seeing someone just before I met you her name was Jen, and it was nothing compared to this. I want to be truthful, I'm not perfect but I want to try with you" I say ignoring my own advice. I must mention Jen, so that she can't stab me in the back and ruin my chances down the line.
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"I’ve never felt anything like this before. I’ve never wanted to see somebody so much. I understand if that’s not what you want and I just wanted to ask whether you would liked to give us a go " I implore her. That's it done, I've laid my cards out for her to see, I am exposed and the next choice is hers.
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"I'd like that" she says shyly and my tummy flips. Why am I so nervous? Building all of my hopes on her, and for it to come crashing down would send me into a spiral. For me they usually involve lots of alcohol. No more though, not with Taylor around.
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"I've been thinking about messaging you all night, Matthew, but I wanted to give you some space to think before contacting you" she says softly and I need to hug her. To hold her. This admission makes the fact that she message him back seem inconsequential. She blew him off as a friend whilst waiting for me to chase. She didn’t think about her reply to him. She thought about me.
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“I’ve been thinking about double messaging you tonight” I laugh and she chuckles again.
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“Look I know that maybe we didn’t start this off properly. But I want to do that now. I just want to give us the best chance” I tell her softly and she reassures me down the phone that we’re going to be just fine.
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Mine I think to myself, and I’ve never been possessive but I find myself wanting to guard her from any male that so much as looks at her. We hang up after all the cliches that new couples do when they don't want to stop talking to each other. I finally get her to hang up first and promise to text in the morning. Today has been a good start. Tomorrow will be perfect.
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