Taylor's POV
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"Matthew" I smile up at him and he strokes my hair.
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"That was so naughty" he whispers and I grin.
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"I can't believe you took me like that" he giggles and I smile up at him.
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"That was the best I've ever had" he says looking down at me. He helps me up and kisses me.
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"I'm going to handcuff you now" he says softly in my ear and my tummy flips. We had bought some handcuffs the other day whilst looking for party outfits. They are pink and fluffy and I laugh slightly as he pulls them out.
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"And then Taylor I'm going to pleasure you until you call out my name over and over" he says slipping his thumb into my mouth as I kiss his hands. Who could resist him? There's not a woman alive, that could say no to that.
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He slowly unclips my suspender belt, and pulls my thong off, maintaining my eye contact the whole entire time. Leaving the stockings on he kisses my own my lips urgently.
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"Do you trust me, Taylor" he asks.
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"With anything" I reply.
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He turns me around so I'm facing the other way and pats my bum.
"Okay get comfy on the bed" he instructs me in my ear. I climb on still facing away from him.
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I hear a clinking noise. I trust him. He's at my side and he cuffs me with the hand cuffs together. He clips them over my wrists checking they're not too tight.
"Told you you're all mine" he tells me.
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"Okay babe, this may be a bit more intense" he whispers caressing my tummy, my but sticking up in the air. Keeping his hand underneath me, first he strokes me in between my legs.
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"Mmmm" I say resting my head down.
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"Ready good girl" he says.
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"Yes, Matthew" I tell him.
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Maintaining a nice and slow pace Matthew possesses me from behind. I whimper and call out his name.
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"Okay babe ?" He asks me hoarsely.
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"It is intense" I tell him.
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"Good intense or bad" he says slowly.
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"Most definitely good" I whimper.
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"Good girl" he says
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Matthew picks up his pace a little. Thrusting harder and deeper, it feels like I'm going to reach my ending much quicker than I normally would.
His hands are holding my hips, he slips one of them down underneath me and starts playing with me whilst he's thrusting from behind.
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"Matthew" I call out as I finish.
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"Good girl" He says breathlessly as I feel him lose himself too.
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Matthew is masterful at sex I have decided. It makes me question where he acquired all of his skills. I've always imagined him to be more sexually experienced than myself, but it's not something I've asked him about.
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I do believe though since we have been discussing stuff like marriage and babies, that I should be able to ask him this.
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"Did that feel good babe?" Hd asks unsure of himself as he lays down next to me. I had been staring into space wondering about his sexual endeavours and he looks at me uneasily.
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"More than good." I tell him, attempting to reassure him.
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"You must have had practice" I hint laughing.
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"Are you suggesting I used to be a whore" he laughs. He turns everything into a funny comment it's one of the things that makes him so easy to be around.
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"Nope, but what's your rough ballpark figure" I pry, feeling just a touch insecure.
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"Of sexual partners I mean" I ask smiling up at him as he rubs my hips with his hands.
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"You want to know" he looks down at me.
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"Of course I do. Spill" I tell him and he laughs slightly. Just a hint of feeling uneasy.
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"Just to clarify you are my first relationship and sexual partner I've had that has meant something to me." He starts softening the blow. Now I'm sure that the number is high, I tighten my arms around my tummy telling myself that here's no need to feel insecure.
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"Including you it's 19" he tells me looking down at me. I'm blown away. Matthew has been around and then some.
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"Matty! That's ridiculous, you know that is like more than some people have in their lifetime right" I tell him.
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"That's like 6 ish girls a year for the last 3 years" I say doing the maths.
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"I know, it's kind of disgraceful." He admits.
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"You got around" I say slowly.
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"Okay it's not like I felt like this though, like each time I didn't feel anything for them. Like I said before I thought I would never love anybody, Ryan always had girlfriends and I just felt like I was missing something. I ended up hanging around with Jay, because he seemed the same as me. He was worse in fact" he tells me propped up on his elbow looking at me.
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"If it helps I'm not proud of it" he adds imploring me with his eyes.
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"I don't want to lie to you, you asked and I told you. Ross, he thinks that's what I'm doing right now and that's adding to how he's acting with us" he tells me. Why did I ask, I feel like my body is going numb.
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"Yeah but that's not what you're doing is it, Matty?" I ask him looking up at him.
He snuggles down the bed to lay with me. He pulls me closer to him.
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"Of course I'm not doing that to you, Taylor. I want you to know that this is real for me. I am happy being with you, more than happy. To be fair I never ever thought I would be with anyone. I think my mum was starting to think she would never have any grandchildren" he laughs.
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I must be calm. He does this a lot, he makes grand statements which make me so happy, so reassured.
Statements that make me forget why I'm questioning him in the first place.
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"I love you Matty, I do. But I need to know, is there any reason Ross knows of that would make him think you would be doing that to me?" I ask him, just be direct. Ignore the pounding in my ears. After all of this I will be his forever, I cannot imagine ever wanting to be with anybody else. Even Ross I admit to myself.
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My heart flutters as he threads his hands through my hair, looking into my eyes. I keep hearing Ross' words in my ear pleading with me to turn to him if I need anything, I realise he's worried about something, should I be ? Ross' admission at the party that he wanted to tell me something and him pleading with me to be careful. Why didn't I think about all of this before? Why didn't I follow it up?
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I look up at him as he speaks, carefully assessing his body language. Watching his eyes.
"There is nothing Taylor, I used to be a dick but meeting you has changed that. I know it sounds cliche but I mean it. Ross has known me for a long time and he can't imagine that I've changed. I love you, I will not let anything get in the way of that, nothing okay?" He tells me and I can see moisture in his eyes.
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I wipe at his eyes with my fingers and he watches me imploring me to hear him.
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"I believe you, I do. I don't think I have a reason to doubt you but I need to know now. I am happy to commit myself to us forever or for however long you will have me. But I want to just know it all first" I tell him holding his face in my hands.
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"I don't deserve you, I have been a complete asshole before and I know that. I know I don't deserve this kind of loyalty and commitment. I don't deserve any of it. Okay? I get that. But I want it, I didn't think I wanted anything like this. But I do. Please don't leave me." He begs me.
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"Im not leaving you Matty." I reassure him kissing him. He holds onto me and keeps me close.
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"I shouldn't have said some of the things that I said. I definitely shouldn't have done the things I did in the past. I just want to be with you, I will happily ditch everything for you. My friend's the lot just so we can be together like this." He explains holding onto my face and looking into my eyes.
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"I've been thinking lately about our relationship, and the things that I want from life. Our relationship has literally changed my perspective on the future. I want one now, I want a future with you. I want to spend time with you and celebrate dumb things like anniversaries. I want you to be at my family parties the ones I used to avoid because I never had a date. I want to put babies in your tummy, my babies. I want to share my life with you. And I know I'm young but I also know that this is what I want from life now" he finishes.
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I start to cry, ugly tears. Full blown blubbering. He just holds me close into him. And I never want to leave.
"I want all of that too, and with you. I can't imagine myself with anybody else ever. I've never felt this way about anybody and maybe I'm being somewhat naive but I know this is what I want. I feel safe with you and complete." I tell him.
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He is crying too. It puts me at ease, I see how emotionally impacted he is by this just as I am. That validates it for me.
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He kisses me once more and then runs his hands down my naked back as I shiver. Massaging my waist he then pulls me on top of him holding me.
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"I've got a plan, hear me out" he tells me a smile playing on his lips.
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"Go ahead" I tell him relaxing into his touch.
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"We go to this party, with everyone. Then we distance ourselves from that scene. I mean Ross is fine we'll see him at uni anyways and Rhea and Malachi that's different. We focus on university and our relationship" he says.
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"We can still do all the things we like. And have double dates like we did today but we just get rid of the craziness" he laughs.
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"Just us Taylor" he smiles as I gaze into his eyes, seeing a man that is happy to sacrifice his life for one with me. To sacrifice most of his friendships, in order to keep us safe.
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