Chapter 53
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The rest of the day and night ended up being uneventful and shortly after Leonard got discharged from the hospital the next day once his oxygen levels were stable enough and there were no lasting effects of the carbon monoxide left in his system Dakota spilled the beans about what she had told Leonard to the others including her family which resulted in everyone congratulating her and Leonard on conceiving their first child together. Even Gia, Simon, and Mrs. Rivers were notified of what had happened as well as The Fordyces in Savannah and even Mrs. Cooper, Missy, and Georgie from Texas which was a combination of concern for Leonard as well as excitement over Dakota’s pregnancy.
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“ Oh my god this is insane! I can’t believe you’re pregnant Dakota!”, Leo exclaimed as she clapped her hands together.
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“ I know Leo! I’m so excited right now that I can’t even contain it!”, Dakota exclaimed as she rested her hand on her stomach.
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“ Yeah well us too! Look, we’re shaking!”, Bernadette exclaimed as she was showing off the fact that they were all shaking uncontrollably over the excitement they were feeling about Dakota becoming a mother.
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“ Yeah I can see that Bernadette! I have eyes!”, Dakota laughed.
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“ Well regardless Dakota we are so happy for you and Leonard!”, Penny exclaimed.
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“ Thanks Penny!”, Dakota exclaimed.
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“ Well do you know what the gender is yet? Boy? Girl?”, Amy asked.
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“ I honestly don’t have a clue yet Amy. Like I said I just found out about this pregnancy a few days ago so it’s probably going to be a while before Leonard and I find out exactly what it is we’re having.”, Dakota said.
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“ Yeah well if it’s a girl I know exactly what your daughter’s name is!”, Leo exclaimed with a smirk.
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“ No, no you don’t Leo! Don’t say anything!”, Dakota said in a dismissive voice as she shook her head at her friend as a way to silence her from spoiling something special.
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“ Oh come on! You can totally trust Penny, Amy, and Bernadette! We’re all best friends here!”, Leo laughed.
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“ Totally! Now spill your guts bi*ch! What is it?!”, Penny exclaimed as her, Amy, and Bernadette moved in closer so they could hear this juicy gossip.
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“ Ok fine! I’ll tell you but none of you are to say a word about this to Leonard until we find out the official gender of our baby! Comprende with a pinky swear?!”, Dakota hissed with a sigh as she held out her pinky to her best friends.
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“ You got it!”, Bernadette said as she and Penny wrapped pinkies with Dakota.
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“ Our lips are sealed!”, Amy said as she did the same thing.
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“ Alright I’m counting on that! Anybody who breaks that promise is getting their skull busted up for it because they don’t call me Skullbreaker for nothing you know!”, Dakota interjected.
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“ Yeah we get it. So go ahead, tell us. We’re listening.”, Bernadette said.
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“ Alright, the name that Leo is talking about is it’s a character from the movie Tomorrowland and I’m pretty sure that you have an idea of what name it is just by me saying the movie title.”, Dakota said with a sigh.
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“ Athena?”, Amy asked with a smile.
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“ Bingo! That’s it Fowler!”, Dakota exclaimed as she pointed at her.
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“ Oh my god I love the name Athena! That is so beautiful Dakota!”, Penny exclaimed.
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“ Thanks Penny, I just hope Leonard likes it.”, Dakota said.
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“ Are you freaking kidding me?! He’s going to absolutely love it!”, Bernadette exclaimed.
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“ Are you sure about that?”, Dakota asked.
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“ Oh to hell he will, he freaking loves you Dakota! If Leonard doesn’t think that female robot’s name is beautiful then he’s a freaking dumb a**!”, Penny exclaimed.
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“ Second it!”, Amy exclaimed as she nodded her head.
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“ Oh my god Penny I can’t believe you actually just called Leonard that!”, Leo laughed.
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“ Well it’s true Leo, sometimes he acts like it because his ego gets a bit too big for his britches! Like this one time he got pissed at me for letting an old friend of mine who’s a guitar player stay the night on my couch and kept telling me to tell the guy to go find another place to stay which began to piss me off because he was trying to tell me who I could and couldn’t have on my couch!”, Penny said.
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“ Well that’s interesting! He’s never once done anything like that to me since we’ve been together!”, Dakota said in surprise.
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“ Well then you’re lucky Skullbreaker.”, Penny said.
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“ Yeah I guess I am. It’s not every day that you get to nail a romance ninja like him who you ended up marrying a while ago and conceiving a child with a few days ago even before and after this whole carbon monoxide incident that happened last night.”, Dakota said with a smile.
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“ True.”, Leo, Amy, Penny, and Bernadette said as they nodded their heads in agreement.
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“ Speaking of that, how’s he doing today since getting back home from the hospital?”, Bernadette asked.
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“ Slow but he seems to be doing ok with no lasting effects which is a really good thing because honestly things could have been a lot worse last night. He could have lost his life and that would’ve absolutely crushed me if I had to bury someone I love.”, Dakota said.
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“ True but he’s still here so as you said that’s a good thing.”, Penny said.
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“ Yes it is. Anything else you want to add to this conversation?”, Dakota asked.
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“ Um yeah let’s talk about Athena!”, Penny exclaimed.
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“ What about Athena? Where are you going with this?”, Dakota asked in confusion.
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“ Well have you thought of a middle name for her yet?”, Bernadette asked.
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“ No not really, I’ve only thought of the first name at this point. I haven’t gotten that far yet. I don’t even know what would sound good with it.”, Dakota said.
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“ Well that’s not a problem at all, we can help you figure that out… that is if you want us to!”, Amy butted in.
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“ That’s sweet Amy but like I said Leonard and I don’t know what the gender of our baby actually is yet so it’s kind of hard to think of middle names when you don’t know exactly what’s growing inside of me at the moment.”, Dakota said as she placed her hand on her stomach again.
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“ That’s true. It might make much more sense if we just wait until we find out exactly what the gender is before we jump to any conclusions right away.”, Bernadette said in agreement.
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“ Great observation Bernadette.”, Dakota said as the other women agreed with her.
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*apartment front door opening and closing*
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“ Hello, we’re finally back from the store.”, Sheldon said as him and Leonard were carrying in bags of groceries.
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“ Hi Sheldon, hi Leonard. What took you guys so long?”, Leo asked.
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“ Yeah I thought you said you were just going to one store.”, Dakota asked.
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“ Well we were but then we ended up driving around to several other stores because the one store didn’t have everything on the list we needed but we’re back now so it doesn’t really matter.”, Leonard said as he set the armful of bags that he was carrying down on the kitchen counter with Sheldon doing the same thing as he then started going through every bag to make sure that they didn’t miss anything.
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“ Cute. How are you feeling after this whole CO incident from last night?”, Dakota asked.
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“ I’m fine, although I feel a bit exhausted now from all the driving around I did while listening to Sheldon constantly talking about ridiculous nonsense.”, Leonard said as he took his glasses off for a moment to rub his eyes before putting them back on his face.
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“ Well can’t say I blame you honey. Why don’t you go lay down for a while, it might help bring some of your strength back.”, Dakota said as she placed a hand on Leonard’s shoulder.
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“ Thanks for the suggestion Dakota, I think I will. I love you.”, Leonard said as he kissed his wife.
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“ I love you too. Have a good nap Leonard.”, Dakota said with a smile as she kissed him back.
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“ Thanks.”, Leonard said as he started walking down the hallway to get to his and Dakota’s room.
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“ Well good Lord what am I supposed to do now?! Put everything away myself?!”, Sheldon condescendingly interjected in the hallway.
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“ Sheldon don’t start, I’m exhausted and I’m not in the mood for this!”, Leonard groaned as he kept walking away before he disappeared into his and Dakota’s bedroom, shutting the door behind him.
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“ Well fine, be like that! See if I care!”, Sheldon shot back which immediately received a chorus of shocked gasps coming from Dakota, Penny, Amy, Leo, and Bernadette over what he just said.
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“ Are you f*cking kidding me right now?!”, Penny shrieked in a somewhat angry voice as she stared at Sheldon.
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“ I got this Penny. Sheldon can I speak to you out in the hallway in private for a moment?”, Leo said to Penny before she looked at her husband with an angry expression on her face.
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“ Why? What do you want Leo?”, Sheldon asked in confusion as he stared at his wife.
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“ Just go! Now!”, Leo shouted as she pointed her finger at the door.
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“ Alright, fine. If you insist.”, Sheldon said as he then headed to the door and stepped out into the hallway with Leo following, slamming the door shut behind them.
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“ Ok I want to know what’s up and I want to know now! What the hell was up with what you just said to Leonard?!”, Leo angrily asked as she crossed her arms in front of her chest.
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“ I’m not understanding what you’re asking here.”, Sheldon said in confusion.
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“ Oh shut up, yes you do! Do you realize that what you just said is completely condescending and insensitive?! Where is your common sense and human decency?!”, Leo hissed.
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“ Um…”, Sheldon said as he was trying to read the situation.
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“ Don’t ‘um’ me mister! Do you not understand what just happened last night?! Leonard was poisoned by carbon monoxide and you’re acting as if it’s not a big deal when in reality IT’S A HUGE DEAL! He’s your best friend and he could’ve suffocated to death due to Anoxia in addition to his Asthma! Do you not get that because it seems like it hasn’t hit you in your egotistical brain yet about the real possibility that you could have lost your best friend who’s now about to become a father due to the fact that Dakota’s now pregnant for God’s sake!”, Leo hissed.
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“ Well I don’t know what you want me to say here. I can’t tell if you’re mad at me or what. Are you mad at me?”, Sheldon asked in confusion.
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“ Oh my god, that’s the question you ask me right now?! Am I mad at you?! You know what you are very lucky that our daughter Cayela is hanging out with her best friend Florence at her house right now because I guarantee you that if she was here this would absolutely kill her with what I’m about to scream at you!”, Leo hissed.
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“ Which is what?”, Sheldon asked.
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“ YOU ARE BEING A COMPLETE SELFISH JERK! TO HELL WITH YOU!”, Leo shouted as she then stormed back into the apartment past Bernadette, Dakota, Amy, and Penny to start heading towards hers and Sheldon’s room.
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“ What the…? Leo?”, the other 4 women asked in confusion as they looked around at each other and in the direction that Leo stormed off to.
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“ No wait, Leo come back here! Where are you going?!”, Sheldon shrieked as he started running after her after he slammed the door shut behind him.
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“ Don’t talk to me right now you bi*chin’ bastard! Just leave me alone!”, Leo screamed as she then stormed into their bedroom slamming the door in her husband’s face as she started to cry.
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“ Oh son of biscuit.”, Sheldon hissed under his breath as he pressed his head against the door.
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“ What the hell did you say to your wife?”, Penny suddenly hissed when she, Amy, Bernadette, and Dakota entered the hallway outside the bedrooms.
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“ I didn’t say anything Penny. I don’t understand what’s going on here.”, Sheldon hissed.
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“ Ok it’s obvious that something’s bothering you so Amy, Bernadette, and Dakota if you guys don’t mind could you go across the hall to my apartment for a moment so I can talk to Sheldon in private?”, Penny said with a sigh.
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“ Sure bestie, come on let’s go.”, Amy said as she started ushering the two other women with her towards the front door.
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“ Don’t kill him.”, Bernadette called out as they opened the door.
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“ No promises.”, Penny called back as the door then slammed shut leaving Penny and Sheldon alone to talk to each other.
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“ Ok what’s your deal Mr. Spock? What’s your trouble on The Enterprise?”, Penny asked in a Star Trek reference with narrowed eyes once her and Sheldon walked back out into the living room.
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“ There’s no trouble, it’s just… I don’t know how to react to this situation.”, Sheldon said with a sigh.
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“ What do you mean by that?”, Penny asked with a frown.
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“ I mean I’m in a state of shock, I don’t know what exactly it is I’m feeling about this. I’ve never had to deal with something as serious as one of my friends getting attacked by the silent killer before. I don’t know what the social protocol is.”, Sheldon said.
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“ Sheldon there’s no social protocol for carbon monoxide poisoning, you just have to be there to support your friend! It’s what any normal person would do at a time like that!”, Penny hissed.
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“ Yes but I’m not normal.”, Sheldon said.
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“ And there’s nothing wrong with that! It’s what makes you, well, YOU but… look, you’re not the only one in a state of shock over this! We all are because none of us were expecting this! It’s just like the RV bomb incident that destroyed half this building a long time ago! We weren’t expecting that either but at any point during that time did we ever once act insensitive towards each other?! No! We just supported each other through it because that’s what friends do no matter what!”, Penny hissed.
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“ Wow, I guess I didn’t really think about that.”, Sheldon said.
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“ Of course you didn’t because it hasn’t fully hit you yet! Leonard really could have died last night if Kripke and Leslie hadn’t been there to carry him out of Caltech the way they did! They saved his godd*mn life! Do you understand what I’m saying to you?!”, Penny hissed.
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“ I do now… oh god this is awful! I don’t know what I was thinking!”, Sheldon sadly said as he then slumped into his spot on the couch and started to cry.
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“ It’s ok.”, Penny sadly said with a sigh as she sat down next to him and pulled him into her chest.
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“ Of all the people to have this happen to in this world why did it have to be Leonard?! It’s not fair!”, Sheldon cried.
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“ I don’t know but it’s going to be ok. We just need to remain positive.”, Penny sadly said.
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“ Are you insane?! Are you out of your mind?! How can I remain positive when my best friend nearly lost his life like you said?! This is just like losing my Meemaw all over again and I don’t know I just… oh god, Leonard!”, Sheldon cried.
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“ Shhh, calm down. It’s ok.”, Penny whispered as she started to rub his back just as Oreo was coming out of her hiding spot underneath Leonard’s armchair to see what was going on.
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Meow!
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“ Oh hi Oreo, what’s up?!”, Sheldon sniffled when Oreo suddenly jumped up into his lap, gently headbutting him in the face as she started to pur.
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“ I think she senses that you’re upset sweetie and so she’s trying to make you feel better.”, Penny said with a smile.
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“ Well she’s not doing a very good job of it!”, Sheldon sniffled.
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“ That’s a Bazinga right?”, Penny asked.
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“ One of my best, don’t you think?!”, Sheldon said with a slight laugh and sniffle as Oreo kept rubbing herself on him while purring up a storm. Things then began to calm down after a while with Amy, Bernadette, and Dakota coming back over to 4A and shortly after he made up with his wife Leo he then apologized again to Leonard for the way he acted once Leonard woke up from his nap.
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Ring ring ring!
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“ Dakota your phone is ringing.”, Bernadette said.
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“ Oh thanks Bernadette. Hello?”, Dakota said before she answered her phone.
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“ Hi Dakota, it’s Leslie.”, Leslie said with a smile.
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“ Oh hi Leslie, what are you calling me for?”, Dakota asked in shock.
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“ Oh no reason just wanted to ask you how Leonard’s doing. Is he ok from what happened last night?”, Leslie asked.
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“ Yeah he’s fine, he actually got released from the hospital this morning so we’re back home now. No lasting effects which is very remarkable considering the fact that things could have been a lot worse due to his Asthma.”, Dakota said.
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“ True, well that’s good.”, Leslie said.
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“ Yeah it is. Anyway, when you get the chance to talk to Kripke I just want to let both of you know that I really appreciate you saving my husband’s life… especially now since I’m pregnant.”, Dakota said.
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“ No problem and really?! When did you find that out?!”, Leslie asked in shock.
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“ A few days ago, I kept it a secret for the sole purpose of telling Leonard first before letting everyone else know.”, Dakota said.
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“ Well that’s great, congratulations Dakota! Tell Leonard that I said that to him too!”, Leslie said.
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“ Thanks, I will.”, Dakota said before the two women hung up.
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“ Who was that?”, Leonard asked.
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“ Oh that was Leslie, she just called to ask me how you were doing since this whole incident last night.”, Dakota said.
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“ Oh well that’s sweet. What else did you say to her?”, Leonard asked.
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“ I told her that I’m pregnant and she said congratulations.”, Dakota said.
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“ Well I’ll have to say thank you to her.”, Leonard said.
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“ Of course you will, come here!”, Dakota said with a giddy laugh as she pulled her husband in for a kiss.
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“ I still can’t believe this! We’re going to have our first child together!”, Leonard exclaimed.
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“ I know, it’s really exciting!”, Dakota exclaimed.
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“ I love you Dakota.”, Leonard said with a smile.
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“ I love you too Leonard.”, Dakota with a smile as they resumed kissing each other.
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Ring ring ring!
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“ Oh god who’s calling now?!”, Dakota hissed as her and Leonard pulled away from each other.
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“ It’s my phone this time. Hello?”, Amy said before she answered her phone.
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“ Hi Amy, it’s Peter. Listen, can you by any chance come over to my house and unlock my door for me? I accidentally just now locked myself out while trying to get my mail from my mailbox.”, Peter said as he stood on his front porch with his mail in his hand.
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“ Oh god, really?! Did you try calling Paul to come do it?”, Amy asked as she rolled her eyes.
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“ I did but he’s not answering right now so I don’t know what the hell he’s up to. Look can you please just get over here? My legs are starting to get bit up by mosquitoes at the moment and it’s really itchy and painful. Ow, go away you stupid little suckers!”, Peter hissed as he was trying to swat at the horde of mosquitoes that were biting his exposed legs.
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“ Ok just calm down I’m on my way. I’ll see you in a few minutes.”, Amy said with a sigh as she picked up her purse.
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“ Ok thank you, love you. Bye.”, Peter said.
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“ Love you too, bye.”, Amy said before she hung up and said, “ I’ll be right back you guys.”
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“ Well where are you going Amy?”, Penny asked her best friend who was heading to the door.
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“ Peter’s house to let him back in Penny because apparently my Forensic Files narrator boyfriend accidentally locked himself out while trying to get his mail and apparently Paul wasn’t answering his phone when he tried to call him! Not to mention Peter said his legs are currently getting bit up by mosquitoes at the moment so wish me luck!”, Amy said as she opened the door.
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“ Good luck.”, Bernadette, Leonard, Leo, Dakota, Penny, and Sheldon said.
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“ Thanks.”, Amy said before she left and shut the door behind her. She drove over to Peter’s house moments later to let him back in and visited with him for a few before heading back to apartment 4A. Then a few weeks later as Dakota’s stomach began to grow her and Leonard then found out from their OB/GYN that they were having a daughter to which Dakota revealed to Leonard what she wanted their daughter’s name to be to which he said he loved it resulting in the married couple to come up with the name Athena Makenzie Hofstadter due to Leonard suggesting that it would be a great way to honor Dakota’s sister who passed away if their daughter Athena had her aunt’s first name as her middle name which Dakota loved and thanked him for it. It was also around this time that the gang all found out what the cause of the carbon monoxide leak at Caltech was which was a faulty furnace that was then immediately shut down and repaired by the gas company to prevent the situation from happening again. Despite this when Leonard and the others returned to work shortly after that Leonard began to feel a bit on edge causing him to stop in the middle of what he was doing to press his ear against the closed laboratory door which immediately caught Howard’s attention who was working in there with him.
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“ Leonard what the hell are you doing?”, Howard asked as his friend as he looked up at him.
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“ I’m just listening to see if I can hear any alarms going off in the hallway for some reason. You can never to be too cautious now.”, Leonard said in a concerned tone as he kept pressing his ear into the door and listening to the noises out in the hallway.
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“ That’s true but why? For cripes sake is this still about the whole carbon monoxide incident that happened to you?”, Howard asked.
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“ Honestly, yes it is Wolowitz. I don’t know what it is about this whole thing but to me something just still doesn’t feel right.”, Leonard said in concern.
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“ Buddy you’re just being paranoid, the issue’s been fixed already. It’s not going to happen again.”, Howard said with a sigh as he went back to working on what was in front of him.
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“ Yeah well you try going through what I went through and then say that because I guarantee you that you won’t be saying that if it happens to you!”, Leonard hissed as he moved slightly away from the door to look at his aerospace engineer friend.
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“ True but I don’t obsess over stupid things like this, not like the way you seem to be right now.”, Howard shot back.
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“ Oh puhlease, that’s a bunch of malarkey! You obsess over stupid things all the time! Like for instance, need I remind of the time that you completely freaked out over the fact that you thought that the government was out to get us after they took over our guidance system project?! It was like you were acting exactly like Sheldon when he gets pissy about certain things and refuses to let them go no matter how many times we tell him to stop!”, Leonard shot back.
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“ What the f*ck does that have to do with what we’re talking about here?”, Howard asked in confusion.
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“ It doesn’t have anything to do with it Howard I was just making a point! Gahhh!”, Leonard hissed as he started to pace the floor while gripping his head with his hands as if he was about to rip his hair out of his scalp.
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“ Ok ok ok look, we all get it that this situation was scary considering the fact that you almost lost your life but it’s over and done with! Instead of continuing to focus on something that’s now in the past, why not just focus on Athena! You know, your daughter-to-be that’s currently still on her way to being born soon! That’s what your attention should be focused on while you’re working! Because believe it or not I actually overheard what you said to Simon about the only thing that was going to matter to him was his second daughter when he was having that freak out about him and Gia losing their house in a fire as well as everything else bad that happened to us in the recent years which to be honest I think is very true, even for your situation!”, Howard said with a sigh.
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“ You’re right, that’s the only thing I should care about at the moment. There’s really going to be nothing better than the day when I finally get to see my first precious daughter in the eyes. Man to me it still doesn’t feel real that I’m actually going to be a dad soon.”, Leonard said as he returned to his work with a smile on his face.
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“ Well don’t worry it will, eventually.”, Howard said with a smirk as he slapped Leonard on the shoulder.
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“ Oh shut up!”, Leonard laughed as he shook his head. He then began to think about all the possibilities of what his daughter would look like and about who she would look like when she’s born as he continued working on his laser.
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‘ I can’t wait to meet you soon my sweet beautiful baby girl Athena Makenzie. Daddy already loves you so much.’, Leonard thought in his head as his work continued with Howard doing the same thing before they took their lunch break with Sheldon, Raj, Leo, and Amy. They all then got back to work for the rest of the day before they went their separate ways with Leo, Sheldon, and Leonard going to pick up Cayela from school who had Florence with her to hang out for a while due to the fact her parents were still at work and wouldn’t be back until around 6 to come pick her up.
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“ Hey Dakota we’re home!”, Leo said with a smile when she walked in the door with Leonard, Sheldon, Cayela, and Florence.
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“ Hey what up Leo?”, Dakota said as she sat on the couch with a blanket draped over her legs and Oreo curled up on top of her lap while watching tv.
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“ Not much just picked up Cayela and Florence from school and oh… hi Artemis, what are you doing here?”, Leo asked in shock when she suddenly noticed Artemis walking around in the kitchen.
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“ Oh hi Leo. I just thought I’d come over here to hang out with Dakota for a few hours considering the fact that she can’t really do much right now since she’s pregnant.”, Artemis said with a smile as she grabbed a glass of water and walked over to Dakota, handing it to her.
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“ Yeah thanks for pointing out the obvious!”, Dakota laughed.
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“ Ah just zip your trap Skullbreaker and drink your water! You don’t know what you’re talking about anyway!”, Artemis laughed as she waved her hand off at her friend.
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“ Well neither do you half the time!”, Dakota laughed before she took a sip of her water.
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“ Quit it!”, Artemis laughed.
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“ Well good Lord what kind of obnoxious social convention is this?! It’s starting to make my ears bleed!”, Sheldon butted in as he started walking away.
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“ You know Sheldon it seems like everything does which there’s nothing wrong with that, except that sometimes it can be a bit annoying.”, Artemis said as she tossed her hair over her shoulder.
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“ Well that doesn’t surprise me one bit Artemis because I’ve heard that word my whole life.”, Sheldon said.
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“ You want to just go to my room Florence? It seems like the adults want to have a conversation with themselves.”, Cayela asked as she stood next to her best friend with her backpack slung over her shoulder.
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“ Sounds good to me Cayela.”, Florence said.
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“ Well ok. We’re just going to my room now and you guys can talk about whatever you want.”, Cayela said as her and Florence started walking to Cayela’s room. Oreo instantly jumped up from Dakota’s lap to follow them.
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“ Watch out girls, Oreo’s right behind you!”, Dakota called out.
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“ Thanks for the head’s up Auntie Dakota! Come on Oreo!”, Cayela called back before her and Florence disappeared into the room, shutting the door behind them after Oreo followed them in, meowing at their heels.
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“ So anyway, how was work today?”, Dakota asked.
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“ It was alright although I did feel a bit on edge for a period of time about this whole CO incident but Howard managed to snap me out of it after he told me to think about Athena.”, Leonard said as he walked over to his armchair and sat down.
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“ Well that’s nice honey. How thoughtful of him.”, Dakota said.
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“ Yeah. So how was your day?”, Leonard asked.
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“ BORING as HELL! Not to mention I feel like a pile of crap because I’ve been constantly getting up off and on to go throw up in the bathroom, what for like, how long would you say I’ve been doing it for?”, Dakota asked Artemis.
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“ Um you’ve been doing it for the past 2 hours Skullbreaker so yeah you’ve been a total crapshoot.”, Artemis said as she nodded her head.
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“ Thanks.”, Dakota sarcastically said as she rolled her eyes.
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“ Oh what fresh hell is this?! What are you trying to do Dakota?! Infect this whole apartment?!”, Sheldon shot back as he did a head rotation.
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“ No I’m not trying to infect anything Sheldon, it’s just my hormones firing off from my pregnancy with Athena! Leo did the same exact thing when she was pregnant with Cayela so who are you to complain about what I’m doing?!”, Dakota hissed at her friend.
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“ Yeah lay off buddy! We’re not in the mood for this!”, Leonard hissed at his best friend.
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“ You continue to underestimate me my good man!”, Sheldon responded.
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“ Gahhh somebody just kill me please!”, Leonard hissed as he threw his head in his hands, shaking it in disbelief.
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*text message tri-tone sounds*
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“ Text message Artemis?”, Leo asked.
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“ Yeah Leo, hold on one second.”, Artemis said as she took her phone out to look at the message she just got. She then said, “ Ok… we got a problem even though this is really laughable.”
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“ What? What is it?”, Dakota asked.
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“ You are not going to believe what Kenner just texted me! He said that he just got a letter in the mail from the family of that French woman that you beat in the international championship stating that you cheated! Can you believe this nonsense?!”, Artemis hissed.
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“ WHAT?!”, Sheldon, Dakota, Leonard, and Leo shrieked in surprise as they all stared at her.
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“ Are you frackin’ kidding me right now Artemis?!”, Dakota shrieked with a dropped open mouth.
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“ No I swear to God I’m not Skullbreaker, he fricken texted me that! This woman and her family are literally claiming that you cheated with the use of steroids and they’re currently trying to expose you to the press as a fraud! That’s absolutely ridiculous!”, Artemis hissed.
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“ Um to hell it is! She ain’t got nothing on me, that’s ludicrous! I haven’t done any drugs in my entire life! That’s complete bull! I won that fight fair and square, no doubt about it! You know what I think it is?! I think she’s just jealous that my fighting skills are better than her’s! You know what I’m saying?!”, Dakota hissed.
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“ I do and you know what I think another thing she’s jealous of is the fact that you’re married to a genius and she’s not!”, Artemis hissed.
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“ Yes well I got one thing to say to her if that’s what’s she is feeling at the moment, as far as I’m concerned she can go suck a lemon because she is nothing but a piece of crap!”, Dakota hissed as she threw her arm down.
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“ Damn right she is girl! You got the right attitude with that trash talk! You ain’t got nothing to hide!”, Artemis hissed.
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“ Yeah go ahead, try to screw me bi*ch! See if I care!”, Dakota hissed as she stood up and stormed to her’s and Leonard’s room.
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“ Mom what’s going on out here?”, Cayela asked when her and Florence suddenly popped their heads out through the door of Cayela’s room.
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“ Nothing you need to be concerned about at the moment Cayela! Just go back into your room and continue playing with your best friend. I’ll be coming in there in a moment to change your diaper since it’s been a few hours that you had it last.”, Leo said as she tucked her hair behind her ear.
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“ Ok.”, Cayela said with a sigh as her and Florence ducked back into her room and shut the door again.
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Knock knock!
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“ Danny? What are you doing here?”, Leo asked in confusion when she opened the door to see Danny standing there in his police uniform.
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“ Hi Leo, where’s Dakota? I need to talk to her about something really important.”, Danny said in a serious tone.
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“ Um she just went into her’s and Leonard’s bedroom, hold on one second. Dakota get out here! Danny’s here and he wants to talk to you!”, Leo called out.
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“ Oh god what the hell is it now?! This better be good for what it’s worth Metcalf or I swear to God I’m gonna wring your neck!”, Dakota hissed as she came storming back out of the bedroom to meet Danny’s gaze.
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“ That’s not appropriate right now so please don’t threaten me and I wanted to talk to you about what Artemis already obviously told you.”, Danny said in concern.
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“ Yeah yeah yeah I know, that French woman’s claiming I cheated in the fight which is total bogus! Get to the point dude!”, Dakota hissed as she crossed her arms.
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“ Ok ok! It’s actually gotten much worse now. Not only did she make these claims to the press but she also made them to the DGSE and so they’re now sending a few agents from the embassy to talk to you.”, Danny said in concern.
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“ What?!”, Leonard asked in concern as Leo and Sheldon dropped their mouths open.
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“ You got to be f*cking sh*tting me! Seriously?!”, Artemis and Dakota hissed in surprise and anger as they looked at each other.
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“ I wish I was.”, Danny said in concern as he shrugged his shoulders.
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“ Ok you know what girl it’s official now! This bi*ch has so got to go!”, Artemis interjected as she jerked her head and finger around like Hannah Montana did when she was trash talking Mikayla Skeech in the Hannah Montana tv series on the Disney Channel.
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“ I know that Artemis Maxson but what am I supposed to do?! I can’t fight her, I’m pregnant with Athena for God’s sake! Are you out of your mind?! You want me to harm my precious unborn daughter just to settle a score with some snobby woman who apparently can’t handle and/or accept the fact that she lost to me fair and square?! I think not!”, Dakota shot back as she placed her hand on her stomach.
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Knock knock!
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“ Ouvrez, c'est la DGSE!”
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English translator: “ Open up, this is the FBI!”
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“ Oh fudge it’s the French authorities! What do I do?!”, Dakota groaned.
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“ I believe that I will handle this! Excuse me a moment!”, Sheldon said as he opened the door and ducked out into the hallway, shutting the door behind him.
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“ No wait Sheldon…gahhh! Well there goes my freedom as well as my reputation! He’s going to ruin it with whatever’s going to come out of his mouth! Sh*t!”, Dakota hissed.
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“ Ah ah give it a minute.”, Leonard said as he shook his head. They all stood there for the next few minutes not saying a word until Sheldon walked back in after his brief conversation with the French authorities with the help of the translator.
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“ There, problem solved.”, Sheldon said as he walked past his wife and their other friends.
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“ Really?!”, Leo, Danny, Leonard, and Artemis asked in shock.
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“ You got them to leave?! What did you say?!”, Dakota asked in shock.
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“ I simply told them that the other woman has no case against you and that this whole thing is too petty to be worrying about and wasting time on versus other things that are much more important. I also told them to go tell the truth to the press that what this woman is claiming is completely false and a bunch of malarkey.”, Sheldon said.
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“ Wow, that is not what I expected! You may be a weirdo at times but man you are a great friend! Thanks for having my back.”, Dakota said with a smile.
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“ No problem.”, Sheldon said.
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“ Ok well now that’s over I’m going to go take care of Cayela’s needs.”, Leo said as she headed to Cayela’s room.
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“ Well ok Leo. I’m just gonna head out of here now. Bye you guys, later.”, Danny said as he headed to the door.
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“ See you Danny.”, Leonard, Artemis, and Dakota said before Danny left and shut the door.
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“ What the freak was going on over here? Why was I hearing a bunch of English and French language outside my door?”, Penny asked when she came over from across the hall.
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“ That was Sheldon talking to the French authorities about the validity of the claims against me of cheating from one of the fighters I went up against in the international championship.”, Dakota said with a sigh.
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“ Oh god are you serious Dakota?! Is this that French woman that you beat that’s making these ridiculous claims?!”, Penny hissed as she rolled her eyes.
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“ Yes it is Penny because she’s just trying to screw me and ruin my reputation as a fighter to which I don’t appreciate and I swear to God if she was here right now I’d want nothing more than to punch her lights out because she is being the most petty snot ever about this! Seriously, who the hell does that to somebody?!”, Dakota hissed.
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“ Um I don’t know but that’s very weird and as you said very petty! What a sick skanky ho she is!”, Penny hissed.
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“ Exactly!”, Dakota hissed. Leo came back out moments later and the conversations continued for a bit longer before everyone went their separate ways. Then a few months later Dakota was suddenly rushed to the hospital in the middle of the night and after a few hours of painful contractions Dakota finally gave birth to Athena Makenzie Hofstadter who was then cleaned off and examined before she was handed back to Dakota all swaddled in a pink blanket with a pink hat on her head. She was completely healthy and looked absolutely perfect.
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Wahhh!
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“ Oh my God, I’m gonna cry!”, Dakota exclaimed as she began to feel the happy tears forming in her eyes.
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“ Me too! I can’t believe this, she’s finally here! We’re finally parents Dakota!”, Leonard exclaimed as the same thing was happening to him.
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“ I know Leonard! I’m so freaking happy!”, Dakota happily cried as she gently kissed Athena’s head with Leonard doing the same.
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“ Congratulations you guys! She’s absolutely beautiful!”, Leo happily cried when she walked up to see her goddaughter to which Dakota and Leonard recently named her and Sheldon as Athena’s godparents 2 weeks prior to the delivery date considering the fact that they were Cayela’s godparents and this just made a whole lot of sense.
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“ Thank you Leo! You want to see her?!”, Dakota happily cried.
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“ Of course I do! Hi Athena, it’s Auntie Leo! You are absolutely precious!”, Leo cooed as she gently held the baby in her arms. Everyone then got a chance to hold her and talk about how much they loved her already. Then a few days later shortly after Dakota and Leonard brought Athena home from the hospital and getting settled into a new routine that every first time parents go through their happiness was suddenly shattered when Dakota, Leonard, Sheldon, Leo, and Cayela were suddenly woken up in the middle of the night by Dakota’s phone ringing.
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Ring ring ring!
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“ Oh god who’s that calling at this time of night?!”, Leonard groggily hissed as he began to sit up in bed with Dakota doing the same as she picked up her phone on the nightstand.
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“ It’s Axel. Let me see what he wants. Hello?”, Dakota groggily said before she answered her phone.
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“ Son of a bi*ch I hate my life right now Dakota! You’re not going to believe what just happened to me!”, Axel hissed at his cousin on the other end of the phone.
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“ Oh fudge what is it now? Why are you freaking out at the moment like the world is ending and someone’s going to get killed?”, Dakota groggily said as she threw her head back.
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“ Cuz, this is serious! I’m freaking out because some lowlife just stole my f*cking van and all my work equipment right out of my driveway!”, Axel shouted as he was trying to catch his breath.
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“ What?! Someone stole your van and all your equipment?!”, Dakota shrieked in concern which immediately caught the attention of her husband as well as their two friends and goddaughter who all came running into hers and Leonard’s room while baby Athena was still sound asleep in her crib in the nursery.
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“ WHAT?!”, Leonard, Leo, Sheldon, and Cayela shrieked in concern as well.
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“ Yes, I’m not freaking kidding! I was sound asleep in my bed when all of a sudden I heard noises coming from outside my house prompting me to peek out my window through the blinds to see two huge dudes jumping into my van and driving off with it after one of them must have hot-wired the engine! Oh god this is awful! What do I do now?! I have to work tomorrow but now I have no way to get there and no equipment to do my job! Butternuts!”, Axel hissed as he was pacing around outside his house due to the fact that he was forced to go back home after he chased the robbers for several blocks before losing sight of them.
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“ Dude you’re a volcanologist studying volcanoes! What equipment could you possibly need for this?!”, Leonard butted into the conversation when he hit the speakerphone key on his wife’s phone.
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“ Leonard I don’t have time to answer these questions! Gahhhh I’m so freakin’ mad right now! Seriously what is with people?! Why is it that they feel like they have to steal things that aren’t theirs from others all the time?! This kleptomania thing is getting out of hand!”, Axel hissed.
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“ I very much agree with you Axel! This is chaos if you ask me!”, Sheldon interjected.
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“ Thank you Sheldon!”, Axel hissed.
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“ Ok ok that’s enough of that! Axel just calm down, everything’s going to be okay! Just call the Santa Monica Police and they’ll go track your van down in no time!”, Dakota interjected as she scratched the back of her head.
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“ I already did that Dakota just before I called you and they said they’d get here when they get here which I don’t know what the hell that even means!”, Axel hissed.
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“ Ha, I don’t know what the hell that even means! That’s funny!”, Cayela laughed as she leaned against the open doorway wearing just a t-shirt and diaper.
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“ Cayela Rachelle Fordyce-Cooper zip it! That’s not appropriate!”, Leo and Sheldon scolded their autistic 14 year old daughter.
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“ Aww come on Mom and Dad, cut me some slack would ya?! That was so funny what Cousin Axel just said!”, Cayela laughed.
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“ We don’t care if that was funny to you or not young lady! Go back to bed! It is way past your bedtime and this is not a conversation you need to be listening to at the moment! So go on, get! Scram!”, Sheldon scolded as he started ushering her back into her room to put her back to bed.
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Wahhhh!
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“ Oh fudge!”, Leonard groaned as he threw his head back.
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“ What was that?”, Axel asked.
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“ It’s just Athena, she woke up crying which means she needs something. Leonard can you please go see what’s wrong with her?”, Dakota said with a sigh.
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“ Yeah I’ll go take care of it Dakota, hold on one second. Daddy’s coming Athena.”, Leonard said as he got up and headed to the nursery to see what was wrong with his daughter. Athena’s crying lasted for about a minute longer before it stopped shortly after Leonard changed her diaper and put her back to bed. Dakota continued talking to Axel on the phone a little while longer before she hung up and headed back to bed with Leonard, Leo, and Sheldon following suit. Then the next day shortly after the guys left for work Leo and Dakota decided to go run some errands, bringing Athena and Cayela with them as well as Sawyer who was hanging out with Cayela at the time due to the fact that both Mr. and Mrs. Mullinex were at work and they didn’t want their daughter staying home by herself for the whole day.
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“ I know you’re lyin’, ‘cause your lips are movin’! Tell me do you think I’m dumb! I might be young, but I ain’t stupid! Talkin’ ‘round in circles with your tongue! I gave you bass, you gave me sweet talk, sweet talk! Sayin’ how I’m your number one! But I know you’re lyin’, ‘cause your lips are movin’! Baby, don’t you know I’m done!”, Cayela and Sawyer sang together in the backseat of Leo’s car to the song playing on the radio which was Lips Are Movin by Meghan Trainor as they were bouncing around making baby Athena who was sitting in her car seat next to them start cooing and smiling in amusement at what they were doing.
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“ Ok ok let’s tone it down back there girls!”, Leo said with a giddy laugh as she kept driving.
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“ Yes please before somebody gets hurt in this car!”, Dakota said.
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“ Oh come on y’all, give us a break Mrs. Hofstadter! Cayela and I are just trying to have a little fun plus it looks like your daughter Athena’s loving it! She’s just sitting in her car seat making really cute sounds and smiling in amusement at what we’re doing!”, Sawyer laughed.
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“ Yeah she is and it’s absolutely adorable!”, Cayela laughed.
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“ A ba ba ba!”, Athena cooed happily as she was wiggling around in her car seat just smiling like any other child would do if they were happy.
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“ Well I guess I can’t argue with that.”, Dakota said before she cooed, “ Whatcha doing Athena? Are you having fun back there? Is Mommy’s precious little girl having fun?” which made Athena start smiling even more when she heard her mother’s tender loving voice.
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“ I’m so happy I gave birth to her.”, Dakota said with a smile.
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“ I think we all are.”, Leo said with a smile as she kept driving. They then got to the store moments later and began their shopping spree carrying on conversations as normal before they headed home. Sawyer’s parents came to pick her up a few hours later shortly before Leonard decided go driving around with Paul and Peter to go hang out with them for a while after they all got off work, dragging Sheldon with them despite the fact that Sheldon thought that this was a bad idea since it was nearly dusk when they left and he never felt safe going out at night.
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“ Guys Night Out, yeah! Let’s do this!”, Leonard exclaimed with a smirk as he was smacking his palm against the ceiling of the Medstar Television Studio van that Paul was driving. Music was playing on the radio as well to which the tune was Don’t Bring Me Down by Electric Light Orchestra.
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“ What is with you Leonard?!”, Sheldon interjected as he gave his best friend a weird look while they were sitting the back seat next to each other.
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“ Oh come on buddy, don’t be like that! This is going to be fun! We’ve been working all day!”, Leonard shot back.
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“ Yeah what he said, quit buzzkilling it Sheldon! You’re just being a wuss!”, Peter laughed as he motioned his head back at Leonard while sitting in the front passenger seat next to Paul. Instantly Leonard, Paul, and even Peter started laughing in amusement while smacking hands with each other which immediately made Sheldon give them an unamused stare with narrowed eyes.
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“ Excuse me but I am most certainly not and that was very rude what you just said!”, Sheldon shot back.
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“ Sheldon we’re just messing with you! We’re friends, it’s what friends do!”, Paul laughed.
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“ True Paul but I’m still not amused by that remark Peter just said! I feel as if I’m sitting in the middle of a chaotic circus or something like that!”, Sheldon interjected.
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“ Well then that’s your opinion Sheldon Cooper which you’re entitled to but that’s not the point. We didn’t come out here to start bitchin’ ok, we came out here to have a little bit of fun with two of our friends and for you and I to get away from our wives and daughters for a bit. So let’s just have a good time rather than you trying to suck the fun out of it.”, Leonard hissed.
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“ Alright if you insist Leonard Hofstadter although I still feel like this is a bad idea.”, Sheldon huffed.
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“ Shut it you crazy bastard!”, Leonard shot back.
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“ How many times do I have to tell you all that I’m not crazy, my…!”, Sheldon shot back only to be interrupted by Leonard, Peter, and Paul interjecting, “ We know your mother had you tested, now quit saying that!” as the music kept playing on the radio. However as the 4 men continued cruising through the city they were suddenly struck on the side of the van by some unknown force that instantly took one of the side mirrors off causing a loud boom and screeching sound from the tires as it skidded to one side of the road for a brief moment that the 4 of them immediately took notice to.
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“ Holy sh*t! What the hell was that?!”, Peter shrieked.
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“ I’m not sure Peter but if I had to guess I would say it’s probably those same two idiots that almost killed us at our studio and tried to kidnap Cayela, Florence, Charlotte, Mckenna, Sawyer, and Racy when we were watching them after they got out of school a long while ago!”, Paul shrieked.
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“ Ivas Stormbender and Twister Screech?! Are you fucking kidding me right now?!”, Peter shrieked.
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“ No I swear to god I’m not! Who else do you think I’m talking about?!”, Paul shrieked.
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“ Good Lord this doesn’t sound good at all! I thought those two were in jail!”, Sheldon shrieked.
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“ That’s what we all thought Sheldon but apparently… OH FOR GOD SAKES, PAUL MOVE! There’s someone speeding right at us!”, Leonard screamed as he he could see another set of bright headlights speeding right towards them almost in a head-on collision.
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“ Yeah I see it Leonard, it’s Ivas and Twister!”, Paul screamed as he was trying to steer the van away out of the path of Ivas’s van.
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“ Prepare for trouble!”, Ivas evilly shouted out his window with an evil smirk on his face.
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“ Make it double!”, Twister evilly shouted doing the same thing out his window.
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“ You’re history Dowling and Thomas! Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!”, Ivas evilly laughed as he slammed his van into Paul and Peter’s van.
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“ Ahhhhhhh!”, Leonard, Sheldon, Paul, and Peter screamed in terror as the van violently jerked while Paul was still trying to divert it out of the way.
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“ Why don’t you take a tornado too you idiots! Errahhhhhh!”, Twister evilly screeched as he threw another tornado at the van as well while his friend was repeatedly ramming his van into it trying to run the 4 men off the road to their deaths into a ditch.
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“ I don’t think so! Why don’t you take this back Screech! This is for taking off our side mirror with that stupid vortex you psycho!”, Paul shouted out his window.
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“ Yeah what he said! Eat this!”, Peter shouted out his window before he reached over to grab the steering wheel and made a hard left with it to bounce the tornado back at the two villains making them spin out for a brief moment before they went right back to ramming into them.
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“ Why I oughtta shut you up permanently Peter including your stupid friends and that stupid girlfriend of yours!”, Ivas evilly shouted as he took another shot at the van.
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“ WHAT?!”, Paul, Leonard, and Sheldon shouted in shock and anger at what Ivas just said.
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“ Oh ho ho ho, you did not just go there jack! Nobody insults my friends like that and gets away with it, especially MY AMY! You are so dead for that Stormbender! And I’m not talking about your good-natured relatives Delia, Alvin, Arista, Raciella, Blaze, and Dexter! I am straight up talking to YOU!”, Peter shouted.
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“ Yeah well I don’t care! They’re going to be dead when I get done with them after I get done with you two as well as pathetic Sheldon and Leonard back there too!”, Ivas shouted.
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“ No you and Twister are going to be dead! Hit ‘em again Peter!”, Leonard shouted.
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“ With pleasure Leonard! Suck on this Ivas Philbin Stormbender and Twister Malakai Screech!”, Peter shouted as he reached over and took the wheel from Paul again to ram their van back at Ivas and Twister again which didn’t really do a whole lot of anything in terms of making them back off because they just continued going at it relentlessly to which really began to make the 4 men scared that these guys were going to kill them.
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“ Oh what fresh hell is this?! It’s like these guys won’t ever give up! They’re acting like The Shredder and The Foot Clan from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!”, Sheldon screamed.
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“ Exactly Sheldon except both of them are fictional and Shredder is a metal-faced jack a**!”, Leonard screamed.
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“ Wait, Shredder is a what?!”, Peter interjected.
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“ Never mind!”, Leonard screamed.
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“ Last episode of Forensic Files, EVER! You’re going to oblivion!”, Twister evilly laughed.
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“ No we’re not! You and your stupid friend are!”, Paul shouted as he rammed the van this time into Ivas’s van again making him spin out a bit more only for him to quickly regain traction again and continue his rampage like a relentless stinging hornet.
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“ For God sakes this is getting ridiculous now! I’m calling Danny!”, Leonard screamed as he pulled out his phone to call Danny.
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“ Hello?”, Danny groggily answered after the first few rings as he sat up in bed with Molly doing the same considering the fact that April was crying on the baby monitor and needed attention.
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“ Danny it’s Leonard! We have a serious problem going on right now!”, Leonard screamed.
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“ Wait, what? Leonard what’s the problem? You woke me up out of a dead sleep.”, Danny groggily asked in concern as he was rubbing his temples.
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“ The problem is we’re being attacked! Ivas and Twister apparently escaped from jail tonight and they’re now repeatedly ramming Ivas’s van into Paul and Peter’s Medstar Television Studio van trying to run Peter, Paul, Sheldon, and I off the road into a ditch! They’re trying to kill us!”, Leonard screamed over the loud banging and screeching tire noises that were still going on.
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“ What?! Oh not on my watch they’re not! Hang on a moment Leonard, I’m coming!”, Danny screamed as he quickly jumped up out of bed, threw on his uniform and started running out of the bedroom after he hung up his phone, running to the front door hissing, “ You’re dead Stormbender and Screech! Here comes Officer Danny Leroy Metcalf to kick your a**es!”
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“ Wait woah woah woah, Danny where the hell are you going at this time of night?! What’s going on?!”, Molly shrieked at her husband when she suddenly came out of the nursery holding their infant daughter in her arms trying to get her to fall back asleep.
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“ I can’t talk right now Molly! Ivas and Twister are screwing with our friends Paul, Peter, Leonard, and Sheldon by trying to run them off the road into a ditch in the Medstar Television van using Ivas’s van! I got to go!”, Danny shrieked as he then bolted out of the house, got into his police cruiser and sped off with sirens and lights going calling for back up from the department after he explained the situation leaving Molly standing alone in their house confused and worried.
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“ Oh skeet shootin’ hell!”, Molly hissed as she rolled her eyes and smacked her face against her palm while still cradling April in her other arm.
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Weewoo weewoo weewoo weewoo weewoo weewoo weewoo weewoo weewoo weewoo!
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“ Pull over now in the name of the law you creeps!”, Danny interjected out his window at Twister and Ivas through a blow horn as he was approaching the scene with several other officers following suit.
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“ Oh sh*t Twister, it’s Officer Metcalf and the rest of the stupid Five-O! What the hell are they doing here?!”, Ivas evilly shouted.
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“ I don’t know Ivas but they are so dead! Back off jacks! Errahhhhhhh!”, Twister evilly shouted as he threw a tornado at Danny’s car out his window but Danny quickly dodged it shouting, “ I don’t think so pal, come here! This is for screwing with my friends!” as he then sped up barreling straight towards the two villains, ramming into the side of Ivas’s van at a 45 degree angle just as Ivas struck the Medstar van again causing Ivas to spin completely out of control making the two men scream in absolute terror as they went crashing into a roadside ditch which immediately made the front of the van go up in flames as it came to a dead stop.
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“ Oh you’re dead for that fuzz man! I’m gonna…!”, Twister evilly shouted as he immediately jumped out of the van and was about to throw another tornado back at Danny and the other cops who began to surround them only for Ivas to quickly book it shouting at his friend, “ Yo would you just book it Screech?! What the skeet shootin’ bullfightin’ f*ck do you think you’re doing?! We got to go man! Catch us if you can stupid cops!”
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“ Oh would you shut up Stormbender?! Later creeps, ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!”, Twister evilly shouted as he took off running after his friend too laughing like an evil maniac just as Paul, Peter, Sheldon, and Leonard stopped in the middle of the road to see what was going on.
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“ Oh no you don’t, come back here! Get ‘em get ‘em get ‘em!”, Danny shouted as he and his fellow officers quickly got out of their cars and took off running after the two men with their weapons drawn.
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“ Come on you guys let’s go get’em too!”, Paul shouted as he then pulled forward and off the road, putting it in park before he started booking it too, following after Danny and the other officers.
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“ Are you freaking kidding me right now man?! This is nuts Dowling! What do you think this is, a Forensic Files moment?!”, Peter shouted as he got out too and started running.
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“ Oh will you shut it Thomas and just get! Come back here you wackos, I’m gonna kick your a** for bashing the buckwheats out of our van!”, Paul shouted at Peter before he shouted after Ivas and Twister.
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“ Hey wait up you guys we’re coming too! Come on Sheldon let’s go!”, Leonard shouted as he booked it too.
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“ Oh dear, I really don’t like the looks of this!”, Sheldon shrieked as he reluctantly followed after Leonard just the Pasadena Fire Department was showing up to put the fire out on Ivas’s van.
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“ Shut up!”, Leonard hissed.
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“ Why don’t all of you shut up! In fact, this oughtta do it! Come here!”, Ivas evilly shouted as he suddenly turned around and captured Sheldon around the neck with his arm causing the theoretical physicist to scream in terror, “ Oh good Lord what is this?! Danger danger, threat upon my person! THREAT UPON MY PERSON!”
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“ Sheldon!”, Leonard, Paul, Peter, and Danny screamed as they tried to intervene only for Gidget to suddenly appear barking and growling at Twister and Ivas as the rest of the officers caught up to the action.
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Grrrrrrrrrrufffff!
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“ Gidget!”, Paul and Peter shrieked.
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“ Get out of here you stupid mutt!”, Twister evilly shouted as he was about to hit the dog with a tornado.
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“ Ah ah ah I don’t think so! What do you punks think you’re doing?! Get your filthy hands off Sheldon now before I take you down in two seconds flat!”, Mrs. Fordyce shouted when she suddenly showed up wearing her police uniform as well with her weapon drawn.
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“ Why don’t you bite me bitch and call off your attack mutt before things all go to hell starting with him! He destroyed my family including my father!”, Ivas evilly shouted as he kept his strong grip on Sheldon despite the fact that Sheldon was trying to get away from him.
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“ You are not touching my son-in law! Get off of him or you’re dead after I sick Gidget on you and your stupid friend! I’m not playing here Ivas!”, Mrs. Fordyce shouted. A scuffle suddenly ensued which ended with the two villains getting caught and Sheldon ending up with a bullet in his side from Mrs. Fordyce by accident after she tried to shoot Ivas with her weapon and missed.
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“ Ow ow ow ow!”, Sheldon shrieked in pain as Leonard, Peter, Paul, Danny, and Mrs. Fordyce were walking Sheldon into 4A moments later with Gidget running in behind them after stopping at the hospital to take care of his injury. This immediately caught the attention of Leo, Dakota, and Cayela who all gasped in horror at what they were seeing.
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“ Oh I know it hurts honey! I am so sorry! I didn’t mean to do that to you!”, Mrs. Fordyce shrieked in concern as she and the others carefully helped him sit down in his spot on the couch.
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“ It’s alright Mom Fordyce, I know you didn’t! God I hate that Ivas punk so much I want to shove him in a graveyard!”, Sheldon hissed in pain with gritted teeth as he was pressing his hand against the side of his ribcage where the bullet wound was covered up by a bandage.
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“ Oh my God!”, Dakota shrieked in horror as she was holding baby Athena in her arms.
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“ What in the hell just happened tonight?! Mom did you accidentally shoot my husband?!”, Leo shrieked in horror as she stared at her mother.
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“ Yes I did Leo and I feel terrible about it! I was trying to shoot Ivas Stormbender because apparently him and his stupid friend Twister Screech escaped tonight and attacked him, Leonard, Paul, and Peter by ramming his van repeatedly into Paul and Peter’s van trying to run them off the road!”, Mrs. Fordyce shrieked in horror as she then went on to explain the rest of the story while pacing back and forth.
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“ Oh god, Dad!”, Cayela shrieked in horror as she ran up behind the couch to wrap her arms around her father.
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“ Stay put, I’m going to get some ice!”, Leo shrieked as she quickly ran to the freezer to grab an ice pack just as the rest of the Fordyce family came walking in the door.
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“ Way to go Miranda! How could you shoot our son-in law with your firearm like that?!”, Mr. Fordyce scolded his wife.
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“ Oh will you shut up Robert, I didn’t do it on purpose! It was an accident! That Ivas Stormbender punk tried to use him as a human shield when I was trying to shoot at him to begin with but at the last moment he shoved Sheldon at Twister and I missed where I was aiming, shooting Sheldon in the ribcage instead!”, Mrs. Fordyce hissed at her husband.
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“ Yeah sure you did Mom!”, Amanda sarcastically said as she rolled her eyes.
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“ Amanda zip it, this is not the time for this! Oh god this is just great, this is a disasster! What am I supposed to tell Mary, that I accidentally shot her son while trying to shoot a criminal?! She’s going to think I’m a total bi*ch for this!”, Mrs. Fordyce hissed.
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“ Miranda that’s a bunch of hooha and you know it! Why on Earth would you ever think that?! She’s family!”, Aunt Sylvia shot back at her sister-in law.
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“ I don’t know what I’m thinking at the moment Sylvia! This kind of mistake has never happened to me in my entire life, ever! I feel like an absolutely totally lousy person for shooting Sheldon now! Son of a bi*ch!”, Mrs. Fordyce hissed as she shook her head.
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“ Wait, what’s this about Sheldon getting shot by Mrs. Fordyce?! What the hell is going on?!”, Penny hissed when she suddenly stormed in from across the hall.
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“ Penny not now!”, Leo hissed as she walked back over to Sheldon and handed him the ice pack.
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“ Thank you Leo! Ah!”, Sheldon hissed as he then placed the cold compress against his ribcage.
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“ Of course honey, I love you.”, Leo said as she kissed him.
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“ I love you too.”, Sheldon gasped as he kissed her back.
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“ Nice going bitch!”, Penny hissed at Mrs. Fordyce.
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“ Penny that’s not helping!”, Mrs. Fordyce shot back.
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“ Well what about this? I believe I can fly! I got shot by the FBI…!”, Junior sang at the top of his lungs with a stupid smirk as he was jumping around in a circle like an idiot causing everyone to start staring at him including his mother.
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“ No! That’s not helping either Junior Clyde Fordyce! Cut it out young man!”, Mrs. Fordyce scolded him.
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“ Smooth bro! Mom told your ass!”, Garrett laughed as he pointed at his younger brother.
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“ Garrett Tyson Fordyce shut up!”, Junior shot back.
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“ Both of you shut up!”, Kennedy butted in.
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“ Kennedy Louisa!”, Stephen, Garrett, and Junior hissed at their sister.
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“ What?!”, Kennedy hissed.
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“ Your input is not needed at the moment young lady! Zip the lip!”, Mr. Fordyce scolded her.
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“ Alright fine! Geez Louise!”, Kennedy shot back as she rolled her eyes. The rest of the gang was notified of what happened not long after that and they all showed up to figure out what to do next until baby Athena started crying prompting Leonard to go see what was wrong with her. Then a few years later as things were seemingly getting back to normal and shortly after Athena had turned 13 just a year younger than Cayela and her friends Florence was at her gymnastics meet doing warmup exercises with her boyfriend Terrance while the rest of the team was doing the same with each other when all of a sudden Coach Bixler blew his whistle to catch all of their attention, making them stop what they were doing to look at him only to discover that there was a new girl standing next to him.
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“ Listen up boys and girls, I have a wonderful announcement to make! We have a new teammate joining us tonight! She’s a sweet, smart girl from Bridgeport, West Virginia who just moved here recently 4 weeks ago but still hasn’t made any friends yet so without further ado I would like to introduce you all to Theora Eleven Wavebird! And Theora these are your new teammates Jason Dugayne, Tara Batista, Kristen Shaddows, Terrance McFalcon, twin sisters Cammi and Carina Witzfield, Deidra Mackabee, and Florence Crenshamezki!”, Coach Bixler said as he introduced them all to each other.
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“ Hi it’s nice to meet you!”, Theora exclaimed with a smile as she waved her hand. She was 14 years old, caucasian, stood about 5 feet 5 inches tall, had bright banana yellow eyes, long straight emerald green to blue ombre hair, and was wearing a bright yellow t-shirt, a pair of dark navy blue gym shorts, and white tennis shoes.
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“ Nice to meet you too!”, Florence, Cammi, Carina, Kristen, Tara, Terrance, and Jason said with a smile as they waved back.
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“ Lame!”, Deidra rudely said as she blew a raspberry at Theora, making it clear that she didn’t like her even though Coach Bixler just introduced them.
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“ Deidra!”, Florence, Cammi, Carina, Kristen, Tara, Terrance, and Jason hissed at her, crossing their arms.
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“ What?! What are you idiots staring at me for like that?!”, Deidra hissed.
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“ Don’t do that! That’s not nice! You are a gymnast and this is not how gymnasts behave! I’ve told you that countless times before!”, Coach Bixler scolded.
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“ So I don’t care Coach Bixler!”, Deidra shot back as she crossed her arms.
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“ Yeah well I do so apologize to Theora right now for that remark you just said or I’m going to put you in the corner again for another penalty timeout!”, Coach Bixler scolded.
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“ But that’s not fair! Why am I always the one getting penalties?!”, Deidra complained.
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“ Because you’re constantly being rude to everyone, that’s why! You make every single meet we have like it’s an illegal dog fighting ring and it’s so annoying! It’s like you’re saying, “ Place your bets on who you think is the alpha dog in this match people!”, Cammi hissed making her other teammates including her sister immediately start snickering at what she said. Even Theora started snickering a little bit too.
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“ I do not say that Cammi, shut up!”, Deidra shouted.
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“ Hey I thought I told you to stop screaming at my sister!”, Carina shouted.
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“ Who asked you Carina?!”, Deidra shouted.
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“ ALRIGHT THAT’S ENOUGH! Deidra apologize to Theora now or you’re going in timeout! I’m not dealing with this crap right now!”, Coach Bixler shouted in a loud booming voice causing the 3 girls to immediately shut up.
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“ Fine! Sorry!”, Deidra hissed in reluctance. Theora then accepted it and joined everyone else on the mat doing what they were doing as well. Then by the end of the meet as everyone else was talking to each other Florence ran up to Theora and said, “ You did great tonight Theora!”
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“ Thanks Florence, you did too!”, Theora said.
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“ Thanks and don’t listen to Deidra, she’s just not a nice person and never has anything nice to say to anybody unfortunately.”, Florence said.
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“ Yeah I kind of figured that by the way she was acting towards me when we first met tonight but it’s ok, I guess some people just aren’t meant to be nice.”, Theora said.
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“ That’s true.”, Florence said.
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“ I would agree with that too babe.”, Terrance said with a smile as he walked up to his girlfriend and the new girl who were talking to each other while waiting for their parents to come pick them up.
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“ Of course you would, you agree with everything I say!”, Florence laughed as she kissed him.
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“ Well there’s nothing wrong with that! I love you!”, Terrance laughed as he kissed her back.
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“ I love you too!”, Florence laughed.
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“ You two are in a relationship?!”, Theora asked in shock.
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“ Yeah, he’s my boyfriend. We’ve been together for, would you say about several years now Terrance?”, Florence asked as she looked at Terrance.
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“ Yeah that’s about right Florence.”, Terrance said as he nodded his head before he grabbed Florence’s hand and held it in his.
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“ Wow, that’s nice. I used to have a boyfriend too but he cheated on me with another girl shortly before I moved away and came here. His name was Jay Blanchard and the girl he cheated on me with was Jovie Valensen, not that it even matters anymore.”, Theora said.
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“ Aww Theora that’s awful, what a jerk he must have been for breaking your heart like that!”, Florence gasped in horror.
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“ Oh believe me Florence he broke my heart in ways I can’t even imagine! He basically secretly cheated on me with Jovie and slandered my name on Facebook several months into his relationship with this girl pretty much calling me crazy and a bunch of god awful things that I only found out about from my brother Carlos when he was strolling through his newsfeed and saw it which absolutely pissed him off. Like he really wanted to rip Jay’s eyes out for that but I told him that it wasn’t worth getting a possible jail sentence if he went through with it so he backed off and just let me handle it.”, Theora said.
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“ Well that’s just messed up. It’s a good thing Kirby doesn’t do that.”, Terrance said.
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“ True. He’s such a great guy.”, Florence said.
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“ Wait woah woah woah hold up a minute! Did you just say Kirby as in Kirby Rossfire?!”, Deidra interjected when she suddenly overheard the conversation and walked up to them.
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“ Yes, why?!”, Florence hissed.
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“ How the hell do you know him?!”, Deidra hissed.
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“ Um he’s my friend who’s dating my best friend Cayela! Why do you ask?! How do you know him?!”, Florence hissed.
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“ I know him because he’s my cousin you bimbo!”, Deidra hissed.
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“ What?! Kirby Blake Rossfire’s your cousin?!”, Florence gasped in complete shock as she stared at Deidra.
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“ Yes he is, he’s the son of my dad’s sister who’s my aunt by the way! Kirby’s sister Anna is also my cousin too even though I rarely see her due to her being on deployment in Iraq a lot!”, Deidra hissed.
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“ Oh my god I can’t believe this!”, Florence hissed.
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“ Yeah well do me a favor Crenshamoron and stay away from my cousin!”, Deidra hissed.
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“ Ok first off it’s Crenshamezki and secondly that’s impossible to do! I just said he’s dating my best friend!”, Florence shouted.
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“ Then get her to break up with him! I don’t want you talking to him!”, Deidra shouted.
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“ Are you insane Deidra?! I’m not doing that, EVER! Kirby is a great guy to her and he’s a great friend to me as well as my boyfriend Terrance too! I’m not going to hurt them like that so you can just forget it and stay out of my friendships!”, Florence shouted.
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“ Fine you want to fight?! Let’s go right now!”, Deidra shouted as she threw her fists up in front as if she getting ready to punch Florence only for Coach Bixler to intervene by blowing his whistle and shouting, “ Hey, no fighting in this gym! Now what’s the problem here?!”
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“ The problem is that Crenshamoron here is friends with my cousin Kirby Rossfire because apparently he’s in a relationship with her stupid best friend!”, Deidra hissed as she pointed at Florence.
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“ How many times do I have to tell you to quit calling me that Mackabee?! It’s Crenshamezki and fyi, my best friend is not stupid! She’s a great special needs girl and I love hanging out with her every chance I get!”, Florence shouted.
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“ Oh puhlease, don’t make me laugh! How could you possibly like hanging out with a girl who’s a complete baby freak due the fact that she wears diapers?! You are so pathetic!”, Deidra laughed which immediately caused everyone to gasp at what she said including Terrance and Florence who both took immediate offense to that.
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“ Oh you did not just go there! No one talks to me like that!”, Florence shouted.
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“ Yeah well I just did!”, Deidra shouted back which instantly sparked a screaming match between the two girls while Terrance and Theora were standing there watching it, unsure of what to do. The fight was eventually broken up moments later when everyone left the gym with Theora following Florence over to 4A to hang out with her and Cayela after their parents told them they could. The three girls had a great time with each other and shortly after they went their separate ways Cayela decided to watch some tv in her room with Oreo curled up next to her while Leo, Sheldon, Leonard, Dakota, and Athena were out in the living room watching a movie when all of a sudden Cayela’s phone started ringing which prompted her to answer it when she saw it was her boyfriend.
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“ Hey babe.”, Kirby said in somewhat of a serious tone.
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“ Oh, hi Kirby. What are you calling me for?”, Cayela asked.
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“ Oh no reason except to tell you that you might want to talk to Summer ASAP. She just sent a group text to all of us saying that she’s really upset about something.”, Kirby said in that same tone.
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“ Well that’s odd, what do you think she’s upset about?”, Cayela asked as she briefly looked at the text that Kirby was talking about.
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“ I don’t know but whatever it is it doesn’t sound good so you might want to talk to her.”, Kirby said.
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“ Well ok, thanks for letting me know. I’ll talk to you later after I find out what’s going on.”, Cayela said.
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“ Sounds good to me. Love you, bye.”, Kirby said.
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“ Love you too, bye.”, Cayela said as she then hung up with Kirby before she called Summer.
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“ Hi Summer.”, Cayela said.
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“ Hi Cayela, did you get my text?!”, Summer cried when she answered the phone.
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“ Yes I did, what’s going on?”, Cayela asked in concern.
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“ My heart is completely shattered right now… I just lost my dad!”, Summer cried.
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“ What?! Your dad died?!”, Cayela gasped in shock and horror at what her friend just said.
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“ Yes he did! It happened just about 3 minutes ago! Oh God why?!”, Summer cried as she grabbed a tissue and blew her nose into it.
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“ Summer that’s horrible! What happened?!”, Cayela shrieked.
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“ He was driving home from work when all of a sudden he was hit by a drunk driver who was going about 70 miles per hour which sent my dad’s car flying about 75 yards down a hill into a pond! The impact killed him instantly!”, Summer cried.
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“ Oh man, I am so sorry. I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better about this.”, Cayela sadly said.
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“ I wish that too but nothing is ever going to help make this better! This is the absolute worst night of my life!”, Summer cried.
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“ I don’t blame you. Are your mom and your sisters ok?”, Cayela sadly asked.
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“ No, they’re an absolute wreck! Meghan and Micayla are currently out in our garage crying and punching things and my mom’s just screaming! They’ve been doing that for the past few minutes since your Uncle Danny told us about the accident! This feels like a freakin’ bad dream that I can’t wake up from!”, Summer cried.
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“ Want me to come over to see you?”, Cayela sadly asked.
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“ If you want to that’s fine!”, Summer cried. The two girls then hung up before Cayela walked out of her room with Oreo following behind her and asked, “ Hey Mom can you please drive me over to my friend Summer’s house?”
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“ At this time of night Cayela? Why?”, Leo asked in confusion as she looked at her daughter. Leonard, Sheldon, Dakota, and Athena looked at Cayela as well when Leo asked this question.
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“ Because I just got off the phone with her and… she said her dad just died.”, Cayela said.
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“ What?!”, Leo and Sheldon gasped in shock and horror.
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“ For God sakes!”, Leonard gasped in shock and horror.
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“ Mr. Langenstein’s dead?! Cayela what the hell happened?!”, Dakota gasped in shock and horror.
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“ Summer said that her dad was driving home from work when he got hit by a drunk driver who sent him flying 75 yards down a hill into a pond. She said it happened about 3 minutes ago.”, Cayela said.
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“ That’s horrible!”, Athena shrieked.
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“ Ok you know what we’re all going over there right now. Come on.”, Leo sadly said as she got up to grab her purse and Cayela’s diaper bag. The others followed her out the door moments later and when they were heading to the stairs Penny suddenly popped her head out of her apartment and asked, “ Where are you guys going?”
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“ We’re going over to the Langenstein’s house Penny. Cayela just told us that Summer’s dad just died in a car accident tonight.”, Leonard sadly said.
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“ What?! Ok wait up I’m coming too! Son of a bitch!”, Penny hissed as she quickly grabbed her purse and locked up her apartment before she followed her friends and two nieces down the stairs.
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“ What does that mean?”, Athena asked.
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“ You don’t need to know what that means right now Athena Makenzie! Keep walking sweetheart!”, Dakota scolded her daughter.
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“ Ok whatever you say Mom.”, Athena said as she kept walking. They all got to the Langenstein residence moments later and walked in the door to hear screaming and crying as well as a bunch of pounding noises coming from the garage.
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“ Hello?! Anyone home?!”, Dakota called out.
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“ Oh, hi!”, Mrs. Langenstein cried when she emerged from her bedroom.
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“ Oh Melina, Cayela just told us what happened. We’re so sorry you lost your husband.”, Leo sadly said as she walked up to Mrs. Langenstein and gave her a hug.
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“ Thank you Leo, I feel like someone just crushed my heart into a million pieces! Oh god, Willard!”, Mrs. Langenstein cried as she threw her arms around Leo.
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“ Come here it’s ok.”, Leonard sadly said as he embraced her too along with his wife Dakota, Penny, and even Sheldon too.
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“ This is the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my entire life! My husband was such a good man! Why did this have to happen to him?! He didn’t deserve this!”, Mrs. Langenstein cried as she shook her head.
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Bang!
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“ God this sucks! Why did you have to leave us Dad?! It’s not fair!”
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“ Meghan shut up! You’re not helping!”
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“ Well you’re not either Micayla! You shut up!”
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As the crying and banging sounds continued from the garage Summer suddenly came down from her room, stormed into the garage and cried, “ Both of you shut up! You guys have been doing this for the past 3 minutes and it’s driving me nuts! I can’t take it anymore!”
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“ Well Dad just died Summer! What the hell do you expect us to do?!”
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“ I don’t know Micayla!”, Summer cried as she then came back into the house, slammed the door shut, stormed into the kitchen crying, “ This is just a load of bullsh*t!” as she then kicked the fridge as hard as she could, sobbing loudly as she then threw herself face down on the counter.
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“ Summer please don’t do that! You’re just making this worse!”, Mrs. Langenstein cried as she entered the kitchen to console her daughter with Leo, Leonard, Sheldon, Penny, Dakota, Cayela, and Athena following and gathering behind her.
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“ I don’t care Mom, I already miss Dad so much! I want him to come back!”, Summer cried as she threw herself into her mother’s chest.
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“ I know baby! I want him to come back just as much as your sisters do too!”, Mrs. Langenstein cried.
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“ Mom!”, Meghan and Micayla cried as they came back in from the garage.
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“ Oh my girls! I love you so much!”, Mrs. Langenstein cried as embraced all 3 of her daughters.
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“ We love you too!”, Summer, Micayla, and Meghan cried as they just held onto each other and their mother.
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“ I know your father loved you very much too! All 3 of you were his entire world! He was so proud of you!”, Mrs. Langenstein cried as she then kissed her daughters on their heads while gently rubbing their backs with her hands. They stayed like that for a few minutes before they let go of each other.
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“ Come here dude.”, Cayela sadly said as she held her arms out.
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“ Thank you for being here for me Cayela! It really means a lot to me!”, Summer cried as she threw herself into her friend, crying into her shoulder. Athena also threw her arms around Summer too in sympathy and for the next few more minutes the three girls held each other as Summer just continued to cry along with the rest of her family.
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To be continued…
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