816Please respect copyright.PENANAp5LcDShbQS
816Please respect copyright.PENANAxDQiC3jf0x
緊接著韻味主播的報導是現場訪問,首先的受訪對象是在三樓被老酒保打敗的長髮肌肉白鬼,他正哭得像個女人一樣,走哂音地說出以下這番話:816Please respect copyright.PENANAsxoD0qG9Ey
816Please respect copyright.PENANAkGOStFVWp0
「那個中國人非常邪惡!他懂得用暗殺拳法……居然……一腳就將我的朋友踢死了……嗚嗚嗚嗚……(英語)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAho6xgfCpDX
816Please respect copyright.PENANAnU1glLmyhm
這種反應實在讓我非常驚奇,肉體強壯到這個地步的男人,內心居然會如此脆弱,實在非常搞笑。大概是懷著過份的自信,所以承受不了失敗吧?816Please respect copyright.PENANAPb9Rxs7Ig3
816Please respect copyright.PENANAefYIcinnmS
接著訪問,是白車送被我爆袋的肌肉白鬼入院的畫面,男聲以旁白解說道:816Please respect copyright.PENANA3JkSNO2Q9Y
816Please respect copyright.PENANApldDU6TCQN
「下體受傷的病人今晨被送到醫院時已經昏迷,經搶救後證實不治……(英語)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAwaW3uzC7tv
816Please respect copyright.PENANAVl8yzxtEi3
下?死撚左?我個心即刻寒一寒,踢一下個春袋就死鳩左?有無搞錯?我以前都踢過唔少人,但從來無踢死過人!816Please respect copyright.PENANAxf51BXdiBI
816Please respect copyright.PENANADQRKm52Wib
「病人的XXXXX與XXXXX受到不能修復的重創,相信下體當時應該受到一下非常強大的衝擊。(英語)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAeEJrJOJ3hh
816Please respect copyright.PENANAY5YcZiYUiD
畫面轉到一個醫生,專業地解釋爆袋白鬼的死因。816Please respect copyright.PENANAbp0q6ow8MS
816Please respect copyright.PENANAMKd6joAzOt
起初我非常懷疑爆袋白鬼是否真的死於爆袋……但見個醫生努力保持冷靜,但依然因為雄性本能難掩心中的恐懼,一路講一路標冷汗。我就知道爆袋白鬼個春袋應該真係爆得好徹底,所以話唔定我應該真係踢死左人。816Please respect copyright.PENANALEkGK8KFEV
816Please respect copyright.PENANAWZ07jqkiF4
另一方面,我終於知道剛剛怪錯了長髮白鬼,他如此傷心的原因不是因為打輸了,原來我真係一腳踢死左佢個Friend。816Please respect copyright.PENANAGYFDubL0DB
816Please respect copyright.PENANAy7AcW5CYMi
不過可能之前殺死首領的時候已經驚夠,所以而家話我聽原來殺多左個人,我心又面都無乜特別淆底的感覺。816Please respect copyright.PENANAApiey4CYGh
816Please respect copyright.PENANALPqEX8jBVE
畫面一轉,一名男性記者站在被警察封鎖的3K黨大屋前報導:816Please respect copyright.PENANA7zeXqjocu1
816Please respect copyright.PENANAPmM0wN3svT
「另一方面,於頂樓的死者頭部中槍,即時死亡,經確認後,死者是該3K黨的一名頭目。(英語)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAQZx55lQpoh
816Please respect copyright.PENANA3mvgoFT6Z3
然後記者又訪問了幾個人,首先是哭到不似人形的大富翁三人組其中一人:816Please respect copyright.PENANADHDRKCg69D
816Please respect copyright.PENANANlkzHx0RXl
「首領對我們很好啊……嗚嗚嗚嗚……(英語)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAKBBBnwP9Rn
816Please respect copyright.PENANAk0ctLIJsFg
之後是一個我未見過的光頭白鬼,他眼有淚光在老酒保的酒吧裡,非常感性地說:816Please respect copyright.PENANAdUxrN7WKRX
816Please respect copyright.PENANAfHxkntcyyJ
「當時我們被一群黑人追打,是首領為我們解圍的,毫無疑問,他是個好人來的……(英語)」我還見到老酒保在他後要抹杯……816Please respect copyright.PENANAfdmrxMmQK5
816Please respect copyright.PENANAXGLxxroaNf
我即時有個疑問,其實點解得我一個比人通緝,老酒保就無事!?真係點諗都唔明。可能因為佢無殺人?定係大家白人圍威喂,當無事發生?816Please respect copyright.PENANAoaDHoSI6GM
816Please respect copyright.PENANA8vRJEjEMB6
是鳩旦,唔撚理鳥。816Please respect copyright.PENANA38hN6vvMqa
816Please respect copyright.PENANAUI6cvo2b7J
最後,是在太陽下變得非常純良的奶鏈白鬼,他用詭異的公雞聲,正經八本地說:816Please respect copyright.PENANA8WkQfXeEC8
816Please respect copyright.PENANALsqddFkuIu
「那個凶殘的中國人是駕駛一架好古怪的粉紅豹車來的。(英語)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAUyfAQjnf9W
816Please respect copyright.PENANAK7LD9xEmNr
回到主播室,韻味主播作個總結:「警方相信今次事件應該是幫派仇殺,以下是疑犯的樣貌拼圖。(英語)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAm6nT18COcj
816Please respect copyright.PENANAcnr5jbsrEX
一幅疑犯(我)的拼圖馬上就出現。816Please respect copyright.PENANA8ASSfEUrBS
816Please respect copyright.PENANAOXOB1T0JYy
但我第一個反應是:816Please respect copyright.PENANA19wcemtXMV
816Please respect copyright.PENANApLZSSruRve
邊鳩個黎嫁?816Please respect copyright.PENANAXZMJ0KioZC
816Please respect copyright.PENANApXl4SWfDMC
圖中人與我根本是兩個不同的人,條友似成吉思汗多過似我,成個額頭重要係光頭,然後好似清朝人咁有條辮,重要連眼鏡都無戴,相信依個通緝對我應該是完全沒有威脅。816Please respect copyright.PENANAFOZnwZlLss
816Please respect copyright.PENANAxZR4KNUu45
『我』的拼圖出了五秒後,主播就報導下一段新聞:「接下來,同樣是華人新聞,一群華人現於市中心遊行,爭取……(英語)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAXlRjYbHfCE
816Please respect copyright.PENANAheTkItwSta
816Please respect copyright.PENANAe2mG13DmOA
既然有關我的新聞已經播完,我都無理由睇落去,於是繼續諗方法解決一個更重要的問題。816Please respect copyright.PENANA8hsF2cOl93
816Please respect copyright.PENANAe6AZtECD2u
盧卡斯張單其實我有能力找到數既,不過我將具有這能力的白金信用卡以及提款卡遺留了在香港。因為不習慣帶太多東西遠行的關係,所以我現在身上就只有一張得50000蚊信用額既垃圾卡,以及幾百元美金。816Please respect copyright.PENANAkmYxi5x3fa
816Please respect copyright.PENANA975NSFshDC
五萬蚊港紙距離搞惦條數重有好遠路。心入面既魔鬼同我講,其實我可以一走了之,不過諗深一層,諗到之後盧卡斯會比人丟出街,就真係有少少唔忍心。816Please respect copyright.PENANAhZ1RxX6diV
816Please respect copyright.PENANASteVGS9ulR
加上聽講佢屋企係拎綜緩過活,相信都無能力幫佢找左依條數,如果找唔到條數,醫院之後應該會搵佢追數。816Please respect copyright.PENANAIlOaFahy3K
816Please respect copyright.PENANAG0H1HBCd82
如果問我,醫院會用乜野方式去追返條數既話……我只諗到盧卡斯健康既內臟,將會同幾個唔同既有錢佬合體……雖然美國是法治社會,但法治唔到的地方依然是存在的。816Please respect copyright.PENANAH01Zo1Zl44
816Please respect copyright.PENANA0rMrXxvj1f
算喇……我都係盡一盡長輩的責任,諗計幫佢搞惦條數佢。816Please respect copyright.PENANAUQcoAhw671
816Please respect copyright.PENANAChkXniGoeT
可能你會問,而家我身上得咁少錢,想幫都幫唔到嫁?不過我要話你知,依個世界有樣野叫做「出外靠朋友」!816Please respect copyright.PENANAIHmxS4bJJc
816Please respect copyright.PENANANFeCgFualP
所以我現在立即致電一個人,請她幫我解決現在的問題,對她來說,這個小銀碼根本就不是錢。816Please respect copyright.PENANA0QJHqXgXcv
816Please respect copyright.PENANAksWjyFUscj
響了兩秒,終於有人聽電話,她不帶尾音地說:「Who.」一聽聲音我就知道是阿花本人,於是立即就開門見山地請求:816Please respect copyright.PENANAoCuHhsZdd4
816Please respect copyright.PENANAgVo2S1MMj2
「阿花,是我,有點事想找你幫個忙。(普通話)」我特登用了普通話,首先我們上次溝通是用普通話,無疑這已經成了慣例。816Please respect copyright.PENANAynumLsBnjO
816Please respect copyright.PENANAcJPBp2JOjx
再者,有求於人都是不要太自我,太有骨氣,帶有過多原則比較好,所以這一刻,為了使她順耳一點,我為救盧卡斯放棄了自己的母語。816Please respect copyright.PENANAeDTbbaD26b
816Please respect copyright.PENANANwTKh1gyOM
她沒有問我是誰,相信在芝加哥會同佢講普通話既人唔多,加上我把聲其實好鳩易認,唔講你唔知,我歌喉重非常之好。816Please respect copyright.PENANAp6QjsAZCKo
816Please respect copyright.PENANA2x39Wa6z11
「你才剛駕我的車去殺完人,又想我幫你做什麼?(普通話)」她以皇帝那種高傲得黎,又帶點微微輕佻的語氣反問我。816Please respect copyright.PENANArYLWhJBjBf
816Please respect copyright.PENANAMVutIrI6EC
唔知點解我覺得她應該正躺在一張高級梳化,一邊讓女僕為自己修甲,一邊說出以上的話。816Please respect copyright.PENANA3xcxDTAKnW
816Please respect copyright.PENANAWECHoSSKt9
但她居然會知我殺完人,這使我有點驚訝:「你怎麼會知道?(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANA9P4B2xgzHO
816Please respect copyright.PENANAu2WQ0uzzuK
「新聞才剛播過嘛,別說這個,我都有事要找你幫忙。(普通話)」她以很高的速度說出以上的話,同時命令我。816Please respect copyright.PENANAC4qspUETLb
816Please respect copyright.PENANABIpj20KTlQ
這個緊急時期,我沒有拒絕的理由:「什麼事?(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAnkYLXtOgV5
816Please respect copyright.PENANAupB2XZ26eb
她沒有回答,大概懶得向我解釋。她很清楚自己有能力秒殺我的要求,所以直接了當,以沒有疑問語氣地問……其實應該說,她又在命令我,這樣可能會貼切一點:816Please respect copyright.PENANASXu9D7Yp71
816Please respect copyright.PENANAQGydNGNjEw
「你有什麼麻煩。(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAyJm8yXFMFY
816Please respect copyright.PENANAADzy1Bqk72
我很清楚遊戲規則,所以跳過無謂的開場白,誠實地說出對她來說連蚊咬都不如的要求:816Please respect copyright.PENANA170uvZrdH4
816Please respect copyright.PENANABq0s2HoybE
「我要借點錢。(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAH51mCWe6bP
816Please respect copyright.PENANATbSglftlGJ
她立即就問:「多少?(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANA6mTI47RzXT
816Please respect copyright.PENANAW4YfbciF8O
這含有答允的意思,所以我馬上說出銀碼:「三萬,美金,我朋友住醫院了……所以……(普通話)」對於我所補上的原因,她完全沒有興趣知道,所以打斷順便正式答應道:816Please respect copyright.PENANAwULgwU1A22
816Please respect copyright.PENANAjKLvBoHiCG
「好吧。(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAkyqMGvF7f5
816Please respect copyright.PENANAw74CVrcGbS
為保形象,我必須表達自己以朋友的身份向她借這筆錢,留條線讓我以後有個理由,可以搵返依個『有錢』的『朋友』:816Please respect copyright.PENANAbxrsdZjCuj
816Please respect copyright.PENANAdzA6jMojri
「我回香港再還給你。(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAVaoSN57pn1
816Please respect copyright.PENANAPqMia20tg3
她即時拒絕,然後繼續命令我:「不用還了,你立即回來,明天幫我做一件事就可以了。(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAxSO7935sju
816Please respect copyright.PENANA3ilpoo1sxb
其實我都預左唔洗還,而家佢自己話唔洗還就最好喇!咁就幫我慳返筆,真係多鳩謝哂。既然係咁,d錢愈早到愈好,我都唔想再繼續留係醫院:816Please respect copyright.PENANAq6M0x8ZzNf
816Please respect copyright.PENANAHtVhUDwKa2
「但那些錢我現在要,你可以怎樣給我?(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAV9EwPaQrXG
816Please respect copyright.PENANA2N2CZoRTdS
她非常踏實地,用有錢人的方式回答:816Please respect copyright.PENANAgYAPgli7do
816Please respect copyright.PENANAZyjGg4WojM
「等等有人會聯絡你,到時你給他醫院與你朋友的名字,就會有人幫你解決。另外,你最好一小時內給回來。(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANAwbZ0HqJw3e
816Please respect copyright.PENANAhkZtdYh5gV
趕在她收線前,我問最後一個問題:「你那架車要我駕回來嗎?(普通話)」816Please respect copyright.PENANA1YaV2Qn1Ht
816Please respect copyright.PENANALPzgpBpaZl
睇過新聞,我肯定D差佬靠張清朝成吉思汗既拼圖係無可能拉到我。不過佢地唔認得我一件事,佢地依然會認得停在樓下停車場的傻豹號。816Please respect copyright.PENANAnHVlQRG87M
816Please respect copyright.PENANAW3QHuPbP8K
當然我不會再回傻豹號,但我也不能讓車入面的東西變成證物,這對我非常不利,所以我必須要阿花幫我解決埋這個問題。816Please respect copyright.PENANADJu8cDZ6VB
816Please respect copyright.PENANAcpLtasK2zx
她爽快地回答:「不用,有人會處理。(普通話)」然後就收線。816Please respect copyright.PENANAl1W9ZjOplJ
816Please respect copyright.PENANA4E9FmRPicH
今次談判得到重大勝利!我讓她在不知不覺間幫我解決哂所有麻煩。雖然要我講普通話有少少唔開心,但諗返個成果,就知道一切都係值得既!816Please respect copyright.PENANA5LJ6DF44cV
816Please respect copyright.PENANAE1SeNWH0lA
816Please respect copyright.PENANAnJ1KuGPJ4W
兩分鐘後,一通電話打來,是阿花派來的人,有錢人辦事速度真係好快,我講返醫院同盧卡斯個名,再叮囑佢解決傻豹號,他就忠實地向我保證一切都會妥當地解決,然後就非常有禮地收線。816Please respect copyright.PENANAbI5hKnwxFH
816Please respect copyright.PENANAOS4EpGtZt7
體驗到這種服務態度,我心入面不禁讚歎:有錢真係好西正啊!816Please respect copyright.PENANAiRtH90DiKx
816Please respect copyright.PENANAnUpqrwcSKf
我光明正大地從後門離開醫院,打算走出馬路截架的士回去阿花的豪宅,怎知道走了兩個街口都沒有的士。816Please respect copyright.PENANAkzFlbnjqYC
816Please respect copyright.PENANASuB1BGap56
去到第三個街口的時候,我見到一大群遊行示威的人群,本來我打算等人龍離開後就繼續搵的士。816Please respect copyright.PENANA0XLhiUpR4o
816Please respect copyright.PENANAo9qyhY0n3B
但有遊行的地方,就一定會有警察……所以兩秒鐘後,我發現自己已經被幾個差佬包圍……816Please respect copyright.PENANAPgB0f0lm6p
816Please respect copyright.PENANAs1YF5Yh3pp
他們盯著我,看起來非常嚴肅,半秒後一個痴肥白鬼差佬上前,來到我面前兩米的距離。816Please respect copyright.PENANAGBVBGs99Bj
816Please respect copyright.PENANAhDHSaBafzo
佢望住我,我望住佢後面碌電燈柱,心諗:唔鳩係咁樣都認得我啊!?但無事既!無事既!行走多年江湖既經驗話我知,佢無意思拉我。我身上又無槍,D槍我全部留哂係傻豹號,所以就算搜身都唔驚!816Please respect copyright.PENANArgCoIP1B2B
816Please respect copyright.PENANAUGC6ta1AUY
敵不動,我不動。816Please respect copyright.PENANAK4HBSAMRRD
816Please respect copyright.PENANA0w1qIZY4r3
敵一動,我都唔撚動!因為我根本就唔柒知可以點動!咁多個差佬圍鳩住我,你叫我動去邊撚度?定係打鳩佢?唔好玩野啦!佢地五個人有五支炮,我就得條撚,重打?你當我真係痴撚線嫁?816Please respect copyright.PENANANSvmvZ4E7q
816Please respect copyright.PENANAoLtit40U2O
仆街!我成日係新聞見到美國D差佬好鐘意亂鳩咁開槍,而家見到佢地個個都好唔鋸咁望住我,我就好鳩淆底喇!816Please respect copyright.PENANAKa9nNxF7cY
816Please respect copyright.PENANAQiGMNV6y99
媽啊!耶穌佛祖真神,求下你地一定要打救我啊!!今次無事既話,我初一十五食齋啦,好唔好!?816Please respect copyright.PENANAmVozW0l8JW
816Please respect copyright.PENANAyuIPwhbHKd
見到痴肥差佬依然非常凶狠地啤住我,我立即再加注:最多我兩個禮拜唔打飛機!816Please respect copyright.PENANAsjBFqdkIjh
816Please respect copyright.PENANAgFPha5CD34
816Please respect copyright.PENANAnwdvtb6CrD
下一秒……他開口鳥……
816Please respect copyright.PENANAUItWDLkHFf
816Please respect copyright.PENANA6dgUkLywmO