回到工作地方,幹著十多二十年相同的工作,如果我想的話,我用一小時左右已能做好一天的事情,如果我連這個也做不到的話,枉我是個四十五歲的區經了。999Please respect copyright.PENANAjAOZB6lGdo
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而且,大部份瑣碎項目我都會交給阿權做,阿權是副區經,是我的得力助手。999Please respect copyright.PENANAmJkB04836p
999Please respect copyright.PENANAp7sDVYp0Cz
但阿權同時是我一生中最痛恨的人,他除了終日想我早死之外(因為我死了,他順理成章就會晉昇成區經),另外他做過一件我無法原諒的事情。當然表面上我們相處融洽、共同進退,我們甚至被下屬稱呼為「杏加橙二人組」,這個名字好似「達明一派」,我想,如果我們不是區經和副區經,我們會是黃耀明和劉以達。999Please respect copyright.PENANAMRgUOEpNKy
999Please respect copyright.PENANAYYYi14k6Km
還未到中午,我已把手頭工作做好,剩下的時間,我會用來調查「魚柳包」的真相。999Please respect copyright.PENANAwK7x2cqiNC
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「果個乜鳩志宜家係唔係都攪緊依壇野?如果佢果日係無鳩聊聊問下,事後又冇撚左件事,咁我咪好戇鳩?」999Please respect copyright.PENANAG6tZXmS6Pr
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「戇鳩?」沒有問題,反正我一生都做了不少「戇鳩野」。人類又有誰「唔戇鳩」?999Please respect copyright.PENANAG6YPxnLLTg
999Please respect copyright.PENANAYx4nGireOU
你會話,奧巴馬唔戇鳩!劉華唔戇鳩!李嘉誠唔戇鳩!咁梁振英戇鳩掛?董建華戇鳩掛?999Please respect copyright.PENANA6vtF31Cfhg
999Please respect copyright.PENANAf2e2BElfvH
「你戇鳩!我戇鳩!你戇鳩!我戇鳩!」從前有隻枚也是這樣猜的。999Please respect copyright.PENANAtjqKUEdBs4
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戇鳩的我打開電腦,進入總公司那戇鳩的網頁,開始查閱只有區經以上職員才有權限閱讀的戇鳩資料,找尋關於魚柳包芝士尺吋的問題。999Please respect copyright.PENANAiTuxZ5zAzo
999Please respect copyright.PENANAyuHFe2Z7cW
調查結果如我所料,根據單據紀錄,公司的魚柳包一直都是用「半塊芝士」做的,從一九七五年第一間M記在香港建立開始一直如是。999Please respect copyright.PENANAH6V1Eoz5cQ
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「係咩……?」我這樣反問自己。999Please respect copyright.PENANApnweJB8Jun
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我努力回想起過去二十多年腦中關於魚柳包製作的印象,對!曾幾何時,我是親手用一塊芝士做過魚柳包的。999Please respect copyright.PENANARk9m4YIoBt
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再查閱其他資料,由於成本效益問題,公司食材的尺吋一直有所變化,例如盛載薯條的硬紙盒容量在2001年暗中減少了百份之五、上世紀八十年代後漢堡扒的直徑也縮小了百份之七點四、面包比從前更鬆軟是外判商加入了雙倍的發粉、蘋果批的長度也比上世紀短了百份之十,早晨全餐的炒蛋也由上年九月開始減少了百份之十四……等等。999Please respect copyright.PENANAtxBq0anulv
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但無論公司如何透過「偷工減料」增加盈利,總會有跡可尋,留下數據在電腦資料庫裏。999Please respect copyright.PENANAOV52TVcSGR
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但魚柳包偏偏沒有。999Please respect copyright.PENANACOxWovXRw3
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即是說,如果公司從前用過一塊芝士做魚柳包,某年某月改用半塊的話,這個日子我應該可以在資料庫裏查得。999Please respect copyright.PENANALD6YEMFU1F
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但一切我看見的資料和單據都告訴我,魚柳包從來都是用「半塊芝士」做的。999Please respect copyright.PENANAStv6DNWMYc
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問題來了,公司所有材料改動的數據都被機械性地保存下來,唯有魚柳包芝士尺吋的變化被刪改?999Please respect copyright.PENANAnaNyUkHS7c
999Please respect copyright.PENANAXMdCsU6YLX
當然還有一個可能性,就是我和那個「乜鳩志」都記錯了,世上從來沒有一塊芝士做的魚柳包存在過……999Please respect copyright.PENANAkuvoMkQrjF
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午飯時間,我和阿權去了「大X樂」食特價飯。999Please respect copyright.PENANAek37EVUsBA
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我將我早上做的東西和他分享,阿權就這樣說:「波叔,我諗你要返大陸屌多D西,咁可以唔諗咁多無撚謂野!有人話太多精響碌鳩處人會痴撚線!」999Please respect copyright.PENANA9yO8mE0NGe
999Please respect copyright.PENANANxMWlws4uZ
阿權把口好臭,一直如是,我想在他三十六年的人生裏,所說過的「性器官」數量會比他體內的細胞多。999Please respect copyright.PENANA84PQpwUdUM
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然後他繼續說:「屌你老母講開屌西,波叔,記唔記得果個留羊咩鬚既飛哥,佢執鬚仲濃密過西毛果個呢,尋晚我同飛哥去左觀塘襟鐘仔,屌你丫,插破西皮無力處,得來全不費功夫!咁都比我撞到隻一線西……哇!一線西呀,幾撚罕見呀!如果男人碌撚有八吋開外叫百人斬,咁女人有一線西就係終極武器勒!屌你老母!」999Please respect copyright.PENANAYBzW3yRHvg
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我感覺很寂寞,我的人生有十份一就是和阿權口中的「性器官」和「屌你老母」中共同渡過的。999Please respect copyright.PENANAB7VBJoMZYa
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大概由於被阿權這樣以「西、鳩、撚」等「性器官」把我魚柳包的龍門搬走,我更加決定不放棄,我會繼續查下去。999Please respect copyright.PENANAL6nlNPvOeG
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過了幾天,我用盡一切方法調查,事情再沒有任何進展,就彷彿魚柳包一存在,就只有半塊芝士伴隨於世,這時候,我想到去美國的念頭。999Please respect copyright.PENANAoRhHW1lXMM
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我填好假紙,Fax去總公司人事部。我要用我儲了三年的二十一日大假去美國更深入調查魚柳包事件。999Please respect copyright.PENANAL5WqKBnMeZ
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臨走前,我要做多一件事-----999Please respect copyright.PENANA2K3nUQjftt
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我要殺死阿權,胡紹權我屌你老母!