Taylor's POV
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Shuddering, I think to myself, as I shake visibly. Looking down at my hands under the sunlight and up again to the cloudless sky. Shaking my head imperceptibly I discount my worries and lounge back on my elbows. The daisies around me, shooting up from the grass as my dress sways around my thighs. A chain of the pretty daisy flowers looped around in a circle, a gift from him.
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Another shudder, knocks the daisy chain off the side of my cream linen dress as I look up at the sun glistening just behind the clouds. The sound of giggling just in the distance, small patters of feet and a little tiny voice squealing and laughing with daddy.
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A final jolt which makes me blink looking up at the sky before it fades to black.
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***
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Gasping for air as I wake up, the sky is black outside of the small plane window and the lights are off. The plane jolts and I shudder, holding onto Jays arm.
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"It's just a bit of turbulence. We're over the North Atlantic jet stream." Jay murmurs as I watch Henry suckling on his pacifier, the film is on low as Jay keeps watch of both of us.
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The seat belt sign flicks on and we both make sure that we are clipped in alongside Henry who is both swaddled and harnessed. The plane resumes a steady lull as we keep our belts fastened. Jay holds onto me and rubs my arm.
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"Next to the equator maybe?" He suggests as the plane dips a little.
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"Mhmmm" I say kissing his neck as he chuckles.
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"Mon amour" he whispers as I reach down his chest rubbing him as I kiss him.
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"I cannot help it; you are so sexy and we have a privacy curtain" I laugh as he strokes my hair.
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"Mhmmm says you; wearing no bra next to me for hours" he laughs his hand slipping down under my leotard as I gasp slightly.
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As soon as the seatbelt sign flicks off he unclips us and I giggle unfastening his Levi's. His eyes light up as he watches me.
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"This is risky, they'll be serving dinner soon" he chuckles as I kiss his neck my hand just reaching down.
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"I want you over the Atlantic Ocean" I smirk and he laughs.
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Jay does not have to be told more than once, his hands explore me and I sigh against his chest.
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"Mon amour you're naughty" he whispers as I feel his fingers move.
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"Jay" I gasp and he shh's me holding my head into his chest with his free hand.
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"Lord darling" he sighs but I can only smell his aftershave, feel the warmth from his chest as I lose myself. The worry of the hostess serving our caviar whilst we're in the moment very much disappears as I breathe him in, knowing that he's close.
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"God" he exhales as I breathlessly kiss him.
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"Mmm" I say softly and he smirks removing his hands as he kisses me.
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"Mrs Gilbert Scott that was hot" he whispers doing up his jeans. After a whole stream of kisses I disappear to the rest room first, with the hold-all. Changing into my spare leotard, a maroon one and some black leggings before I comb out my long hair and apply some moisturiser. Feeling the afterglow of Jays expert fingers, I smile at myself in the mirror before sashaying back to first class, taking in the scent of the dinner being served. I wonder briefly what Jay has ordered for me and smirk imagining two steaks being delivered to our little booth in the sky.
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"Shhh" Jay coos at Henry as I take a seat.
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"I can take over" I offer smiling down at Henry as he enjoys his bottle.
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"Here Jay I've got him" I tell him as he kisses my forehead passing me our baby. Crossing my legs I wrap Henry up in his blanket and hold the bottle for him.
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Jay appraising me before he freshens up himself, smiles and tells me he will only be a few minutes. Henry finishes his entire bottle, I offer him more from the source, in order to fill him up, he accepts gladly as I rock back and forth slightly feeding him whilst looking out over the ocean. Imagining all of the depths of water below. The deep aquatic life, the orcas and the sea turtles.
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Our food is served and I smile down at my pan fried beef tenderloin and the chocolate tart, alongside a glass of Dom Perignon.
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"Such a cute little one" the waiter smiles down at Henry and I nod.
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"Thank you" I smile and he nods setting out Jays steak and single brandy.
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"Must be only weeks old" he smiles, I look up noticing that he is an older gentlemen who could have his own children.
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"He's a week and a couple of days" I tell him and he nods.
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"He's doing very well to be on a plane for this long." He comments and I couldn't agree more as Jay returns in his camel chinos and a white shirt.
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"Your mains sir" the gentleman smiles and Jay takes a seat, scooping his hair back and smiling up at him in thanks.
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"Congratulations what a beautiful baby" he comments before he leaves, tucking the curtain around again behind him.
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"I have to say I think I may just be the luckiest man alive" Jay comments and I kiss him.
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"Oh no, I am the luckiest" I say looking down at Henry as he unlatches and I rock him in my arms.
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"He finished both the bottle and me" I laugh as Henry closes his eyes. Jay scoffs rifling through the hold-all and retrieving diapers and pjs.
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"Here I'll change him, I'll enjoy parading him around the cabin" he explains grasping hold of Henry as I brush his arm before he leaves. Hearing the awes and coos of the other passengers as I tuck into my beef tenderloin, with sweet potato mash. The food is divine, the most succulent beef I've had in a long time. My phone connected to the WiFi illuminates on the side and I check my message.
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Placing my silver fork down, I pull up the notification from Matthew. Opening up his message I cannot help but to grin.
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Taylor, so we're both on planes in the sky, most likely both above the Atlantic Ocean. How's Henry? I hope he's okay on the plane. I'm counting down the days until I get to hug him again. Missing you both, Matthew xxx
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Instantly reading his message I think about my daisy chain in the dream I had earlier, lying on the grass and hearing the giggles of a child. I hadn't seen Matthew, yet somehow I know the dream was about him. It's somewhat strange that I keep having dreams about a place that I haven't even visited, I have no idea what London or any place in Britain looks like yet somehow my subconscious has coloured it as a place that contains bounding meadows, amber bark trees with leafy green woodlands. Scattered with daisies for me to lay in.
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Truly, it's as though my subconscious is playing out scenarios that could have or would have been my reality should I have not miscarried our twins. I shake my head and set on replying to him.
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Henry has slept mostly the whole time, even through the turbulence. He's pretty happy, did you know that planes have safety bassinets? I'll take a picture to show you when we see you next. How's your flight? We all miss you. Xx
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Imagining Matthew seated on a different plane on a different flight course taking him to an altogether new location. I imagine him pushing his brunette locks back and most probably thinking about everything. I review my message and feel the term we is appropriate, it clubs us together as a family unit. Rather than me saying I miss him.
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The curtain swings and Jay rocks Henry returning back to his seat next to the window. I watch as he cradles him into his chest in his white sleep suit and smile.
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"Your chest is amazing to sleep on" I smile and he giggles as Henry softly snores.
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"The attendants love him" Jay smiles.
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"It's like walking around with a celebrity isn't it" I smirk and he nods.
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"When we visited the store, I was stopped so many times because of his cuteness" I laugh as Henry sleeps soundly in the bassinet. I snap a picture of him deciding to share with Jay that Matthew has messaged.
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"Matthew messaged me asking how he is, I explained all about the bassinet." I smile and he nods holding onto my hand as I watch over Henry.
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"He will miss you guys" Jay says softly and I nod.
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"He will, but he will be in London" I say to him.
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"He will be busy, and the change of scenery will be great for him. I'm glad he's focusing on his portfolio, and his life" I tell him and he agrees.
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"He's great at art, always has been" Jay says quietly.
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"He used to draw comics when we were young. All hero stuff" he laughs as I look up at him smiling. His blonde hair falling loose over his forehead, a small smile over his face.
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"What was the hero he used to draw" he laughs to himself racking his brain.
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"Incredible hawk? Incredible laser hawk?" He chuckles and my eyes widen in amusement imagining them sitting around as adolescents, messing around.
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"Yeah laser hawk. The story lines were awful but I always remember thinking that the drawings were amazing. Super skilled." He laughs and I rub his hand in my own.
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"He's skilled and he doesn't see it. Maybe we'll be investing in his art one day" I laugh and he chuckles.
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"Maybe" he smiles looking over at the movie as I rest my head into his chest, he stokes my hair whilst taking a bite of his steak.
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"Oh I'll move" I smirk and he laughs holding my head back into his chest.
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"No I like having you close, I've missed us over the past couple of days. And I can eat and have my wife at the same time" he chuckles.
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"I missed you Jay, I kept freaking out" I whisper as he strokes my hair back.
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"I'm sorry Taylor I know I never should have left when it was all so fresh" he whispers.
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"I don't mean it like that" I say back to him.
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"I should not have abandoned you, when he was days old, I am sorry. I can make up for that. I don't want you to feel anxious, or worried about anything" he says softly.
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"I'm here I'm not leaving" he whispers and I nod huddling into his warm chest.
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"I know Jay, I love you" I whisper.
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"I love you, I will not be leaving okay? You're stuck with me" he smiles down at me and I nod looking up and into his blue eyes.
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"Please I need you" I whisper and his eyes soften.
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"I said we could manage, I know that, I said it and I meant it. But when you were gone it felt different. And I need you, he needs you." I say softly.
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"I shouldn't have left" he whispers placing his fork down and pulling me practically onto his lap.
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"Next time and it won't be for ages" he whispers looking into my eyes.
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"You're coming with me" he smiles gazing into my eyes.
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"I can show you Palm Jumeirah. The penthouse. Mom often stays in Dubai" he giggles pushing my hair back.
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"She can babysit" he says tickling my sides as I laugh.
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"And I am going to take you dancing and then I'm going to..." he smirks his hands resting on my hips.
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"I'm going to take you home back to our penthouse with the views over the palm" he smiles.
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"And I'm going to kiss your whole entire body" he whispers.
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"And make love to you all night long" he smiles and I catch his excitement as I kiss him fervently.
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"Now, we have so many things to dream about together" he smiles up at me and my gut almost twists as he mentions dreams. As if my subconscious has been cheating on my own life. My own future with Jay and our family that will blossom here in Italy. I've never questioned my future with him before, not even once.
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