Matty's POV
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🎧cardigan - taylor swift
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"It's okay I'm pretty sure that once, isn't going to do anything, plus I pulled out anyways" I'm telling Olivia. She's crying in the car and I'm the least romantic one night stand anybody could ever dream of.
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"But I've never done it before" she whimpers and I resist the urge to groan, instead I open the window and light up.
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"Yeah so pulling out basically means, before I, you know, I removed my" I explain looking at my cigarette and not at her.
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"Oh right, I'm such an idiot" she says and now we move onto the second issue. I'm not experienced like you, I feel like an idiot. I groan internally.
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"Not at all, but don't worry" I say softly, be kind I tell myself. Patient. This is a big deal for her.
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"Ok, no worrying" she says and she wipes her face. Her eyes slightly red and puffy.
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"I am sorry" she says and I push my hair back not wanting this conversation before nine am.
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"For what?" I venture and she notices my short tone.
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"For making you pissed at me, this morning" she explains. And I didn't foresee this, Olivia seemed so self assured. Now she's just coming across as emotional, clingy and dependent. I've only had sex with her once and she's convinced she's having my babies.
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"You didn't, I was just being an ass" I say attempting to bring this conversation to a close. Shouldn't she be going into work? This is tedious.
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"Hey, do you want too" she asks and I look over at her. Do I want to what? I wonder. I take a long drag on my cigarette, and exhale out of the window. Indifferent to her.
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"Umm it's just I finish at the same time" she begins and my plan is working, I should be happy although I am not. Looks like I'm entertaining Olivia again tonight. Be spontaneous I tell myself, girls love that it's sexy.
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I take my hand and stroke her hair back, resting my palm on her chin and neck. She softens at my touch and I breathe in a little before I lean into her. I kiss her lips softly.
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"You want more, Olivia" I whisper my face close to hers.
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She breathes in sharply and I smirk. She watches me like I'm dangerous, and I am. If she had as much sense as I thought she did, she would have bolted by now.
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"Yes" she says simply. Totally naive, just like a virgin.
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"Well you know where I'll be at the end of your shift" I whisper, my other hand reaching down to her thigh.
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She clears her throat and I continue to stroke her thigh.
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"Mmm" I say slowly in her ear.
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"This is ready for more now" I tell her stroking her lightly. She shh's me and looks around the parking lot frantically. I laugh unable to contain myself.
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"Don't worry just a load of old couples" I say removing my hands.
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"I kept watch" I wink at her and she laughs slightly before collecting her stuff and opening the door.
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"See you later" she says before leaving my 4x4. Visiting hours aren't until midday which means that I have a few hours to kill before I'm back here, at the hospital. Where I seem to spend all of my living moments recently.
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I reverse off and out of the lot, besides there's a few things I need to check off of my list before I end up with Olivia again later.
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First step is to clean out the car. However difficult it is for me to get rid of Taylor's things, no matter how inconsequential, hair bands and even her rubbish. It must go, if I'm supposed to be showing Olivia that I like her and that I'm interested.
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I text Rachel, I can just imagine her face when she receives a message from me first. Utter disdain at first most likely, and then curiosity will get the better of her and she will read it.
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Can we please have an old school party tonight. Make it happen. M
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This will be intoxicating to her, a party means alcohol and dancing and they're her favourite things. I feel a pang of jealousy at just not being able to see Taylor tonight; what she's wearing, how her hair falls over her shoulders, and how she would turn every head in the room at a party. Ingratiate herself and make everybody laugh with her silly jokes. Stop Matthew I tell myself, focus.
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I pull into a valet and pay for the car to be completely cleaned. It's like wiping a slate clean, only I very much preferred it dirty. I laugh to myself and the guy looks at me with an expression of incredulity on his face.
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"Yeah man sorry what did you ask me?" I say to him.
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"Sure, did you want the gold clean or silver, sir" he asks and my silly brain tells me that if Jay gets it gold standard then so do I.
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"Gold please" I say trying to be normal again. I pay the fare wondering if I'm going through a very early midlife crisis. Why I'm suddenly comparing how myself and Jay clean our cars is beyond me. Plus he has far more vehicles than myself. Maybe Taylor likes fancy cars, my cynical brain tells me and I beg my head to shut up.
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"Sure thing" the guy says clicking away at the till.
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I leave him alone, and wait for them to clear my car of all of Taylor's belongings, not able to do it myself. I push my eternity ring on. Take my phone out from my jeans pocket and decide it's time to bite another bullet and change my wallpaper.
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Scrolling through my photos I find a nondescript photo of all of us in Australia just before the wedding. It's just the guys, and actually it should keep Olivia happy.
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Rach messages me back and I open it, it’s a simple message. Rachel and myself aren’t on great terms. We tolerate one another.
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Joshua Morelli's ? From 7. What's got your party on ?
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The girl is fast, you've got to give her that. Smiling I begin messaging her back. Noticing a notification coming through from Taylor, I abandon Rachel's message and read Tay's.
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Matty, hope you're well. Is Ross okay ? I'm worried again. Please when you can just let me know he's alright. Taylor x
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I look up at my car feeling the irrational urge to go and collect all of her stuff and put it back as if she never left me. I suppress my needs and compose myself. Stroking my hair back I type my reply, reassuring her entirely about Ross. Telling her not to worry. At all. I sign it off as I usually do with an m and three kisses.
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"Cars done" the rather burly man calls out and I nod to him. Walk over and step back into my now Taylor free car. No lingering perfume and none of her belongings.
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I text Rachel and tell her thanks, at least later it won’t just be myself and Olivia. I need to settle her into my friendship group a little, that’s a green flag to most women and she will appreciate it. It might even loosen her up a little.
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Pulling off I check the time and head back to the hospital, Maggie Roger’s coming on over the sound system reminding me of Taylor. And how she would sing along to any of her songs. I briefly wonder what she’s getting up to in Italy and decide that maybe that’s not something I should be thinking about in order to remain calm. I’m going to be picking up lunch for Olivia on my way in. To make up for this morning of course, and to show her that I’m honourable.
