Taylor's POV
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He drove us to the hospital. For a second I truly believed he would drive us straight to the airport, purchase two non returnable tickets and beg me to get on a plane. I sigh wiping my eyes. "What a mess, Taylor" I imagine my mum saying to me. A grin on her face just knowing that I will work everything out in the long run.
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I have married Jay, committed myself to him. I glance at my wedding finger remembering my mum eyeing Matthew at the wedding, he had asked me to dance. Jay, entertaining his mother with a dance whilst Matthew took me in his arms. My mum across the room, watching us inquisitively, a glass in her hand which she occasionally sipped.
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She remembered him of course, no mother forgets the first man her daughter brings home. However for Matthew the memories were fond. Matthew never stepped out of line with any women, and even though he alluded to being a "bad boy" before he met me I'm sure that he always had this soft side just laying in wait.
I sigh, wiping my eyes slowly, there's a fair bit of cleaning up to do this time around. This has become messy. Two things I'm absolutely sure of; firstly Matthew and I never managed to end our relationship, we walked away from a situation that was fraught with despair and loss. Not each other.
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Second, without a doubt I need to tell Jay. It's the right thing to do, even so early on in our marriage. He may hate me, but he will hate me even more if he finds out from somebody else. I consider the pain this has caused all of us, and chastise myself for the entire thing.
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I glance down at Ross, asleep in his new hospital room. Matthew has gone to retrieve food, reminding me that I must eat. I evaluate Ross' injuries with my unprofessional eyes and see the leaps and bounds he is taking even in this short time.
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Following his motorbike accident, several years ago, Ross and I went to a tattooist to cover the scars on his thigh. He fell off of his bike in the snow, knocked himself out then too. I had found him, having driven around, in a blizzard for around an hour trying to locate him.
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Matthew and I had been together at the time, and he kept me on the phone when I was searching for Ross. Upon finding Ross unconscious in the snow on a quiet road his bike strewn across it, Matthew grounded me talking me through what to do and what not to do. I did as he instructed checking his breathing and leaving his helmet on. And Matthew, he grounded me with his voice and his calm instructions. At a time of heightened emotion, he was calm and collected.
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Matthew returns pushing the door open and I glance up at him. Our history has been extensive, we've experienced most of the things a man and women can experience with one another and it's no wonder we feel this connection still. The nurse, Olivia, follows him through and he looks surprised but he holds the door for her.
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He approaches me placing his arms around me, moving his hands down to bump and smiling. I blush slightly as the nurse looks away and back at her clipboard.
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"Cheese pasta with pickles, like you asked for and chocolate, lots of it" he says setting the food down and removing his leather jacket.
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"What did you get for you" I ask softly and he laughs, his hands grasping a small takeaway box.
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"A burger" he sighs and I chuckle.
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"You didn't have to get me cheese pasta and pickles" I laugh.
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"You could have just grabbed a burger and told me to get over it" I chuckle forking up some of the pasta.
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"What kind of person would I be to keep a pregnant woman from her cravings" he smiles.
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"You heard the midwife, now eat" he smirks standing next to Ross' bed.
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As far as hospital beds go, the ones in the private suites are luxurious. This room, apart from the hospital bed is a kin to being in a hotel. Large flatscreen, even a few sofas and a dining set complement the space. The typical light green paint that hospitals use on their walls has been replaced with light oak panelling and fitted with spot lights and reading lights for the patient. A large window showcases the view over the surrounding area.
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"Mmmm" I say taking a first bite.
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"Taylor it's food not sex" Ross coughs from the bed and I laugh.
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"That's why I got you the pasta" Matthew smiles and he kisses my cheek lightly, before Ross opens his eyes. It's cheeky, and totally him, I blush and Olivia pretends to not see a thing.
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"Ohhh shhh it's the next best thing" I reply laughing, smirking at Matthew. Just one more night of us. One more night of playing pretend together.
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"Man, how are you" Matty smiles down at Ross. The care between them is evident, like two brothers who fight but equally love each other.
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I look up briefly at Olivia, notice her checking out Matthew, and smile at her openly. It's not difficult to see the allure of a man such as Matthew James Henderson. Many women have become soft for his brunette curls and green eyes, myself included.
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Olivia, with her flaming red locks, looks back at me tentative at first, but a small smile comes over her as she watches Matthew sit down at the dining table with his burger and tuck in. I roll my eyes and have some more pasta.
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She's pretty, small features I decide watching her do her job. Matthew described her as obnoxious but I think he was just picking at straws. Shes opinionated and self assured, but she's allowed to be. She's a nurse. She has a professional job that she studied for, I imagine Olivia going home and sticking her feet up to watch sex and the city after a long day at work.
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I smile again, catching her eye and the expression she returns surprises me. I imagine she always felt out of step with other women, and I feel sad about that. I want to take her out for shots, and make her dance all night long, not that I can touch alcohol considering my current state of pregnancy. I just feel like she deserves a bit of a laugh.
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"I'm telling you Ross, it's the best pasta, want some" I ask laughing.
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"Will you be feeding me it" he laughs.
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"Sure" I say.
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"Well I'm sure it's better than Rachel, she got the breakfast everywhere" he laughs again and I chuckle.
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I scoop up some pasta and spoon it into his mouth.
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"Good huh" I ask him.
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"Thanks yeah you got all the pasta in my mouth, unlike the porridge this morning." He smirks and I laugh with him.
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"Taylor" he begins and his voice takes on a dream like tone.
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"When we had pasta that night do you remember in the fancy kitchen" he begins and I look up at Olivia alarmed. He's practically delirious.
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"It's the Tramadol" Olivia says and I nod.
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"It's strong stuff, he's a bit spaced out" she explains.
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"Got it" I laugh slightly.
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"Eat" she says surprising me and I smile at her, forking up more pasta. Her concern for me is a shock, but she is a nurse. So really it's not that out of the ordinary.
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"Note to self Rachel is not feeding my baby" I laugh slightly and everybody chuckles.
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"That pasta you made in my fancy kitchen, I do remember" I laugh looking down at Ross feeding him some more.
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"3am wasn't it" he looks up at me a slight smile on his lips.
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I smile and he returns my expression. The door swings and we all wince at the shrill voice entering the room.
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"Guys you have to stop buying food without me" Rach sighs sitting down on one of the sofas crossing one leg over the other and smiling. Nate follows in after her.
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"Hey man" Matthew says to Nate and he nods back at him.
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"Let's make sure next time we get enough just in case Rachel turns up." I laugh looking at Matty, and he winks at me. Rachel rolls her eyes.
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"Oh hey, I have a baby picture from my appointment" I say heading to my purse.
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"Let's see!" Rachel smiles.
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"How'd you get a picture" Ross says delirious and we all laugh. He protests telling us to shut up. He's sensitive, and almost asleep again.
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"Here" I say handing it to Rachel.
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"Aww" she swoons, loudly. Her lips curved in a smile, eyes alight.
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Ross stirs and huffs and then drifts back to sleep, I chuckle and pace back over to him. Stroke his hair lightly and he smiles eyes closed.
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"You see the little nose" she says.
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"Yeah" Nate sighs, he looks over at Matty and rolls his eyes. Still wearing his football jersey from the team he plays for at uni.
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"He's got your nose Tay" she smiles and I laugh slightly.
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"I hope he looks like Jay" I say as she passes the picture back to me and I place it in my bag.
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"He will be such a beautiful little baby" she smiles.
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"You two are next right" I say cheekily and she all but laps up the idea.
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"Woah there Taylor, that's quite a jump" Nate says hastily.
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"But our babies could play together" Rachel laughs.
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Nate sighs, looks between his shoes. It's clear that being a daddy isn't something that he feels will happen to him for a long time.
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Matthew stands binning his takeout stuff and walks over to me, standing by Ross. He glances down at him briefly satisfied he turns his attention back to me.
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"Leave soon yeah" he whispers but everybody can hear him. He's itching to get back and be with me. Who knows when the next time will be or if indeed there will be a next time after I tell Jay.
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"Sure" I smile up at him.
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Almost kissing me in front of everybody, out of pure habit. He styles it out and we take a seat on the other sofa watching some mindless TV. Olivia leaves quietly, and the selfish voice in my head tells me that she will always be the nurse that helped his friend. Not the woman he cares for. Every now and then he glances down at me and I pretend not to notice.
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