Taylor's POV
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Collapsing back into the cream sofa with Ross, he looks up at me expectantly and shows me the work he has done already and I look over it smiling. Jay has joined Jane in the chair. She's on his lap, his arms are around her, he gently kisses her occasionally, I see each kiss and wonder what his lips would feel like on my body. He eyes me when I look up from reading and I look away from them.
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"Hey you know we're almost there with this, if you want me to just type it, I'll have it done by next lecture" Ross says to me smiling.
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"Here let me start" I say taking the laptop from him and smiling back.
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The Chinese arrives and I carry on typing as Jay hands out the boxes. I instruct Ross to eat as he tries to argue but I win focusing on the laptop. Pulling my phone out of my bag to check it briefly smelling the glorious Chinese food, I message Matthew telling him I love him and that I will be back soon before tucking into some sticky sweet and sour.
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Jane has got real housewives on, and I grimace before eyeing Jay with a scowl, he laughs briefly. I focus my eyes on another painting on his wall as he catches my eyes again smiling. I watch how he holds her in his lap and look away from his hand clutching at her breasts and hips.
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"Tay you watch real housewives right?" She says looking over at me and I smirk.
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"Actually no I don't" I admit eating some more chicken. Ross strokes my arm, sitting back with one leg crossed over his knee.
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"What?! What girl doesn't ?" She says abashed and it makes me feel insecure.
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"What do you watch?" She insists baffled by my lack of knowledge on the shows she likes.
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"I watch films mostly. Stuff from different directors." I say counting again in my head, trying desperately not to be rude to her again.
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"Ugh boring" she laughs and I smile considering that conversation over.
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"You watch romantic comedies though ?" She continues eyeing me again.
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"Not really no" I say focusing again on Ross. He keeps me calm and I'm thankful that he is here to buffer this whole encounter, I can't look at Jay he's kissing her ear.
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"Right, weird" she says, giggling at Jay and his constant stream of affection.
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Ross safely places the laptop on the side and smiles. He stretches his arms above his head and I can't help but to drink him in. Gazing at the way his shirt rides up next to me. He catches me and places his hand on my back smiling. Jane begins stroking Jay's hair her fingers going through the delicate blonde strands as she smiles down at him. Occasionally Jay kisses her neck, and I look away. Hearing them kissing makes me feel sick and I shuffle awkwardly looking over at Ross.
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"Right we're almost done here. I'll just save it and email it to you both" he says tactfully shutting down the laptop.
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"Thanks Ross" I say to him and he smiles happily heading to the cloakroom to retrieve my jacket as I slip back into my boots avoiding eye contact with Jay. He watches me from his chair, I can feel his stare and I just wonder what his mother would think of his silly behaviour. I laugh to myself openly as I collect up mine and Ross' plates and take them through to the kitchen. When I return I head back out to the elevator briefly looking at Jane. She just stares at me like I’m a crazy girl that laughs to herself for no apparent reason, her eyes just raking over my attire and long hair.
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Ross shrugs on his leather jacket and places my jacket over my shoulders, he carries the laptop out under his arm and holds onto my bag for me. Looking down at me he presses the call button grasping my hand in his as we wait for the elevator and our getaway from the sexual noises behind us.
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"Thanks Jay" he calls over his shoulder looking down at me into my eyes. He allows me in the elevator first and as the doors close he shields my vision from them, standing in front of me as I hear Jane giggling and moaning from the sofa.
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"That was awkward" I say looking up at him as the elevator descends.
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"He's a dick" he comments, I rest my head in his chest briefly, the tiredness suddenly making me feel exhausted. He lightly kisses my hair, and strokes it down my back.
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"Next time wanna be in a group with just us?" he laughs, and I feel his chest rise and fall as he giggles.
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"Definitely I do not need to see them practically fucking in a chair again" I laugh back looking up at him.
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"I believe that Jay wanted you to see that somehow" he says slyly and I laugh.
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"I don't think I care" I say as he quickly bends his head and brushes his lips against mine slowly. I clear my throat looking away from him.
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"Ross, no I'm with Matthew" I tell him as he pushes his hair back. I must set him straight otherwise I’ll have another irresistible blonde guy coming onto me all the time.
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"I'm sorry my bad" he says softly.
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"Sometimes I look at you and I just forget" he says absentmindedly.
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"Like I already consider you and I to be" he begins before cursing under his breath.
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The elevator bleeps and the doors open as we head out to the car. The Aston martin gleams under the lights in the garage and I take in the shiny maroon paint job. He presses the key and I climb in happy for the comfortable seat. Ross climbs in the drivers side turns it on as the engine roars to life as the heater comes on and I sigh ready for sleep.
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"Sorry" he says once we're driving through to the highway.
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"That was heavy handed of me" he says stealing a glance at me.
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"I can't hurt you, I won't lead you on" I tell him and he nods.
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"I understand Taylor" he smiles looking out through the windshield at the falling snow.
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"It's just like through your body language and the way you are around me you're like my girlfriend but technically you're not" he says as I rest my head back and watch him drive.
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"Taylor it's so difficult because I fell for you the second I saw you and I've wanted you since" he adds.
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"You touch me and hold my hand, you make me feel secure and happy. You told me you loved me so many times after the accident and in the hospital" he says softly reaching for my hand and holding it lightly in his own.
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"You heard all of that?" I ask nervously.
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"Yes I just couldn't speak. And I love you that much too. I would do anything Taylor" he says softly. Taking a slip road, he pulls over in the dark, placing his hazards on so that nobody crashes into us. I eye him curiously as he secures the car and turns to face me.
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"Okay" he breathes out and settles his gaze on me.
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"You have a lot going on, that's fine. You have lots of guys who are into you Taylor, I mean fuck you're with my best friend" he explains.
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"But I love you, have done since we met. Since I saw you it's like my world changed, I'm only concerned by you, only moved by you, I want you in every way possible. And I don't know where you are with that or what position that puts you in but I mean it. My world stops for you" he says and I get the feeling he has been waiting to say it aloud for sometime.
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Peering through the dark and over at him, I search his eyes and see the sincerity behind them. I take his hand briefly in my own, meaning to console him. I have led him on entirely, and even though I have loved him and cared for him it has never been enough.
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"Ross when I found you after the accident, I couldn't imagine that I would be in a world where you no longer existed. You were laying still on the roadside and I blamed myself for the whole damn thing. I was so worried and my emotions really came out" I tell him, attempting to explain my perspective.
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"I thought you were gone forever Ross, and I absolutely freaked out. I care so much about you and I thought I'd lost my best friend" I tell him and he nods.
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"And yes I've loved you and I've cared for you since I met you, but it's unfair of me to lead you on" I tell him and he listens carefully.
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"I'm with Matthew." I say failing to find another way of expressing it.
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"I understand Taylor" he says clasping onto my hand and refusing to let me go.
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"I don't want to complicate things, I just want to tell you how I feel" he says softly.
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"I know" I say looking down at the dash.
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"Okay enough with the heavy" he says after a brief pause. Turning to face the wheel again he indicates and rejoins the highway safely before continuing to drive me home.
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"Milkshake" he asks as we pass a service sign ahead.
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"Always" I smile over at him. I sip my strawberry cheesecake special shake in his passenger seat before we even arrive back at Matthew's.
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