When we enter the cafeteria I clock Jay straight away. He eyes me, and Matthew. I am still soaking wet, from the rain, I walk straight up to him and give him the biggest hug I possibly can. Clinging onto him like I never ever want to let him go.
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"You okay" he smiles down at me breathless.
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"I love you so fucking much" I say.
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"I love you too" he replies.
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"So fucking much" he adds.
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"What's going on then. Spill" Rachel asks soaking up the atmosphere. Everybody is eating lunch, Jay hands me a bowl of pasta and I smile.
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I turn to her with a look of crazed excitement on my face.
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"Jay and I are getting married in a couple of weeks, you're all invited" I say not looking at Ross.
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"I need you, for dress shopping. Plus you're my bridesmaid" I say laughing.
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"I'm only having one and you're it" I laugh.
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Rachel gets up and embraces me in one of the biggest hugs I've ever received from her.
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"Where is it?! Oh a July wedding! What am I wearing" she balls and I laugh sitting down next to Ross. I glance at him and he is taking it all well, smiling even.
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"It's in Australia, I'm going to fly you lot out" Jay says sitting down opposite me.
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"For real" Rachel laughs, ecstatic.
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"I mean if you're all up for it? It would be easier to book the plane tickets if I know for sure" he laughs.
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"We own a place out there so I was going to suggest we all stay there" he adds.
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I look over at him, smiling. I love that place, the gardens and the pool. The sun, the memories of our trip and how he proposed to me on the most beautiful pristine beach I've ever seen in my life.
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"Well I'm in and I'd be honoured to be your bridesmaid" Rachel says.
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I smile at her, tears falling down my cheeks. It's been an emotional morning for me. I scrunch my hair up self consciously as it's drying off into waves. I remove my jumper which is soaked through revealing my camisole underneath.
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"I'll be there" Matthew says smiling at Jay. He stands and embraces him.
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I’m sure he whispers something in Jays ear but it's indiscernible from where I am seated.
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"Wouldn't miss it for the world" Ross says turning to face me.
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He hugs me, I cry some more. So many happy tears. He nods to Jay which is the guy way of saying congratulations.
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“I haven’t decided what I’m wearing let alone what you’re wearing” I laugh looking at Rachel. She smiles.
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“We can decide later” she says back.
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“What colours will coordinate with the place?” I ask Jay.
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“You don’t know where !?” Rachel laughs.
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“Nope it’s a surprise” I smile.
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“Wow that’s a lot of trust” she says.
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“Of course or I’m just crazy” I laugh.
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“Don’t fuck it up” I say to him and he bursts out laughing. He sweeps his hair back and the smile returns, the one I’ve fallen in love with.
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“Never” he smiles.
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“If I were you I’d wear white” he laughs at me. I practically stick my tongue out.
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“Bridesmaid wise go for like pastel colours” he says.
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“Pale blue?” I smile.
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“Would fit perfectly” he says and I stand and go and sit in his lap.
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“July is warm in Australia by the way” he smiles looking at me.
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“I’m going strapless that’s all you’re knowing about my bridal gown” I laugh, I’m also planning on extensive sexy white lingerie for afterwards.
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We finish eating and Jay rubs my thighs the whole time. Having explained the plans to Matty I’m feeling better about the whole situation. Not that it would have changed our plans, but just having that discussion has settled my mind and heart.
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I glance over at him and I smile at him genuinely. He returns my gesture and I look down at my food. We have psychology last, with Ross. And then I plan on meeting Rach for dress shopping and dinner. The guys are heading into town at the same time and I’m only assuming that Jay will ask one of them to be his best man.
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