Matty's POV
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There's a subtle change in the way that she walks, in the way that she leans into his side just that little bit more. Her hands entwined with his. I'm walking behind them, with Ross. And I can't help but to try to think in my head, try to work out what event could solidify her mind into being with him.
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Before there was wiggle room. I could sense it, I was picking at it and trying desperately to make her see that I was the right choice. Not Jay.
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I notice how his hand temporarily rubs her lower back before returning to her hands and I start to begin to wonder.
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The harsher cooler air hits me as we leave the canteen. It's a chilly day today, unseasonably. As if the mere weather is picking up on my mood. Touched out, all out of hope and positivity.
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I head over to my car. I'm sure that Ross will be over later, we will smoke and wallow in our miseries together. Rach sniffs around us as we're saying our goodbyes trying to work out what our plans are for the night. I notice Nate looking uncomfortable, he just wants to spend some time with her. Lord knows why?
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"So" she says inquisitively. Her puffer jacket pulled tightly around her.
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"So" Ross smiles.
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"What is the plan" she says exasperated.
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"Why must I always ask!?" She laughs.
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"And you two" she calls out to Jay and Taylor.
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"Are not getting away that easily" she explains.
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Jay hesitates and Taylor turns around smiling.
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"Matty's at 7" she calls out moments after just watching our expressions.
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"We didn't even have a plan" I admit laughing.
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"It's always 7. And one of your places" she laughs back at me.
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I climb into my car slam the door and I'm out of there. I wouldn't mind Taylor coming over of course. Just not with everybody else.
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Eventually after listening to some pretty heavy music in my car and trying not to think about Taylor. I park up at my home. The one which myself and Taylor used to share.
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I stumble through the front door, chuck my keys down and head upstairs to my room. I have updated it since Taylor, purely because I couldn't stand living in our memories.
I gave all of her stuff back and binned our sheets and bought new ones. Ones that didn't make me think of her every single time I roused from a hazy sleep in the morning. It didn't work of course but it was a crucial step to take in order to move on. Not that I have.
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I strip off, shower and dry off. I grab a soft jumper and jeans to put on. I spray some aftershave and ruffle my brunette curls. Heading down the stairs I go to check if I've got some Prosecco for the girls, well for Rach.
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It's half 6 already and I check my fridge to work out what I can cook for the lot of them when they are here. I haven't had everybody over in so long and even though I'm trying to deny it, I'm happy to have the company.
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I head over to the fire and get it going. Just when it starts to pick up the door knocks and after putting a playlist on I head to the door and open it.
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Standing in the glow of the porch light is Taylor. Her brunette hair long down her side, blue eyes looking into mine. She’s changed into a dress, a black strappy dress which highlights her cleavage and shows off her legs.
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“He’s parking” she comments when she sees my eyes look around.
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“I wanted to say” she begins.
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I look back at her and invite her in. She knows where to go, straight to the fire. She takes in the front room and a hint of a smile spreads across her face.
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“I wanted to say that I will miss you, Matty. That I will..” she begins and a few tears prickle at her eyes.
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Instantly I am next to her. She wipes the tears away, and smiles.
“That I will be happy for you no matter what” she says.
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“Me too” I say looking at her as the bell rings.
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She goes to the door just like she used to when she lived here. She opens it and it’s him, and Ross. I’m left standing by my fire just wishing I could have more than a second alone with her.
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“I picked up Ross on the way” Jay laughs. And they stand there, the two blonde dudes that have been a part of my life for as long as I can remember and I just want to shut the door in their faces and never let her leave.
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“What would you both like to drink” I say instead casually heading to the kitchen.
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“I’m driving” Taylor chimes in.
“so can I just have a mocktail” she adds.
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“Beer for us two” Ross says looking at Jay.
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I grab two beers and hand them to the guys then I set to work on a mocktail for her. I remember what she likes and put some fruit in my blender. She smiles and sets herself between Ross and Jay.
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They begin talking about the moving in process and their new home, but I’m replaying our conversation in my head and picking it apart. Every now and then I glance at her and she will be looking somewhere in the room. Thinking.
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I hand her the sex on the beach mocktail and she thanks me.
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“Hey does everyone want some food too I’m gonna cook” I say.
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“What you thinking” Ross asks.
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“You lot are lucky, I’m gonna make a curry” I say smiling.
We used to make curry together before, when we were together. I catch her staring at the table, the table where countless times we made love to each other.
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“Nice one” Ross says. The door goes and we can all already hear Rach before we have even let her in.
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