I take my dress off intending to bin it. Call it dramatic but I don't want to remember my hen-do.
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"Sorry for throwing you a shitty hen-do" Rachel says and she looks at my tears which just don't stop. She grabs me some pjs from the dresser and hands me them.
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I flinch moving out of my dress, looking down at my hips which are marked again. Remembering how I hit the table as I fell down to the floor. This is my fault, of course it is. I should have been clear with Ross, I shouldn't have led him to believe that anything could happen between us.
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I'm eyeing it in the mirror how the old bruise has popped back up and no doubt there will be a fresh one in the morning. Jay comes in and we're both stunned looking at him because he's crying. Rachel hasn't ever seen Jay cry but he's always magnificent. He gets down on both of his knees. Inspecting my skin and the marks on my hips and he just cries.
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"I'm sorry" he kisses my waist.
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"Are you okay, is baby okay?" He asks looking up at me, protective tone to his voice.
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"Baby is okay" I tell him and I notice Rachel busying herself. Shes staying near, to protect me ? To have my back?
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He kisses my bruises over and over, again. Stands and then cups my chin in his hands.
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"I'm not good at this, I love you and I thought I was losing you and I just reacted" he says.
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"I'm not good at this either. I was trying to tell you before, but because we were having such a nice evening and because I'm going to marry you and not Ross I didn't want to ruin it" I say sobbing.
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"I'm sorry I ever even doubted you" he says and he's crying.
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He searches my eyes. And it's the most I've ever melted looking into his own.
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"That was careless, and reckless and stupid" he says tracing lines on my hips.
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"Taylor Elena Harris" he says and he gets back down on his knees. Rachel gasps and I assume she's watching in shock.
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He indicates that I give him the ring again.
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"Will you still do me the honour of being my wife, for the rest of our lives" he asks me.
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"Will you keep me, have me and hold me every day and every night" he says tears escaping his eyes. This is actually the third time that he has proposed and I've said yes every time.
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"Will you bare all of my children and live with me for the rest of our lives watching our children grow up" he smiles and wipes his eyes.
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I place the ring back on my finger laughing slightly at how I'm in suspenders and lingerie, a marked dress on the floor.
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"Yes always, forever yes" I say crying and he rests his forehead on my tummy. Kisses me lightly and breathes out a long steady breath.
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“I’m so sorry Jay for holding that information from you. I never ever wanted to hurt you or for you to have to go through that” I say softly.
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“I understand, I love you. I was more worried you had changed your mind” he says and he kisses bump.
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“I love you. I’m having your baby Jay” I say looking at him.
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He stands and kisses my lips wiping my eyes. Looking at me with amazement and wonder. He laughs slightly looking over my shoulder.
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"Pull yourself together Rach" he laughs and she splutters laughing and crying her eyes out at the same time.
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"That was beautiful" she sobs.
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“Pass me those pjs” I smile. I pull them on and he links his arms around my waist cupping my belly.
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“Lord I hope Nate proposes to me like that one day” she laughs.
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“That’s the third time Jay has proposed” I laugh.
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“First time was here on the beach, second was after that punch up at the party when we were in the lake house. This was my favourite” I smile at him.
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“You really really love each other.” Rachel smiles.
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“Shall I talk to Ross” Jay says
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“I won’t punch him” he adds smirking.
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“I owe it to him to clear it all up” I say.
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“I need to do it” I say.
I pull my hair up in a ponytail and sigh in my sleep shorts.
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“Wow this is a lot for a hen do” I sigh.
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Rachel laughs.
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“Sorry again for the shoddy hen do” she smiles.
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“No need to apologise” I smile.
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Walking downstairs you could hear a pin drop in the living area everybody is on edge. Jay waltzes in and takes a seat with Matty. Matty looks up at him and he knows I’ve chosen Jay. He looks at me carefully, I can always tell what he’s thinking even still. He’s concerned because he knows that I will now be telling Ross, and his expression tells me that he’s here if he needs me. I smile at him weakly.
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“Can we talk” I ask Ross.
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“Of course” he says and my heart sinks.
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